PLAGIAT MERUPAKAN TINDAKAN TIDAK TERPUJI

PLAGIAT PLAGIATMERUPAKAN MERUPAKANTINDAKAN TINDAKANTIDAK TIDAKTERPUJI TERPUJI

THE LIVED EXPERIENCE OF NOVICE ENGLISH TEACHERS AT A PRIMARY LEVEL

A THESIS

Presented as a Partial Fulfillment of the Requirements to Obtain the Magister Humaniora (M.Hum) Degree in English Language Studies

by Adesia Kusuma Wardani Student Number: 126332030

THE GRADUATE PROGRAM IN ENGLISH LANGUAGE STUDIES SANATA DHARMA UNIVERSITY YOGYAKARTA 2014

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STATEMENT OF ORIGINALITY

This is to certify that all ideas, phrases, sentences, unless otherwise stated, are the ideas, phrases, and sentences of the thesis writer. The writer understands the full consequences including degree cancellation if she took somebody else‟s ideas, phrases, or sentences without proper references.

Yogyakarta, February 10, 2014

Adesia Kusuma Wardani

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LEMBAR PERNYATAAN PERSETUJUAN PUBLIKASI KARYA ILMIAH UNTUK KEPENTINGAN AKADEMIS

Yang bertanda tangan di bawah ini, saya mahasiswa Universitas Sanata Dharma :

Nama

: Adesia Kusuma Wardani

Nomor Mahasiswa

: 126332030

Demi pengembangan ilmu pengetahuan, saya memberikan kepada Perpustakaan Universitas Sanata Dharma karya ilmiah saya yang berjudul :

THE LIVED EXPERIENCE OF NOVICE ENGLISH TEACHERS AT A PRIMARY LEVEL

beserta perangkat yang diperlukan (bila ada). Dengan demikian saya memberikan kepada Perpustakaan Universitas Sanata Dharma hak untuk menyimpan, me-ngalihkan dalam bentuk media lain, mengelolanya dalam bentuk pangkalan data, mendistribusikan secara terbatas, dan mempublikasikannya di Internet atau media lain untuk kepentingan akademis tanpa perlu meminta ijin dari saya maupun memberikan royalti kepada saya selama tetap mencantumkan nama saya sebagai penulis. Demikian pernyataan ini yang saya buat dengan sebenarnya. Dibuat di Yogyakarta Pada tanggal : 10 February 2014

Yang menyatakan

Adesia Kusuma Wardani

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ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS

This thesis would not have been completed without the help and support from many people. Therefore, I would like to express my sincere appreciation to the following people who have assisted me in completing this thesis. First of all, I would like to express my sincere gratitude to Jesus Christ for His guidance and never ending love in finishing this thesis and in breaking all problems I had during my thesis writing. Thank you for bringing me through all of this, Lord. I would also express my gratitude to my parents, brother, and my relatives for the spirit and financial supports that keep me strong in accomplishing my study. I would also like to extend my appreciation to my thesis supervisor, Bapak F.X. Mukarto, Ph.D for his support, encouragement, supervision, and suggestion throughout my research work. Moreover, my appreciation also goes to all lecturers and all the staffs of English Language Studies for the help during my study. I would also like to say my great thanks to Kiki and Jalu for their willingness to share their experiences in their initial years of teaching. Thank you for always making time for me though you both were very busy. I also thank to my best friend Jeng DewiKA for lending her ears to always listen to me, for her prayers, and her encouragement. My thank also goes to

Serenata „Bebek‟, Aditya W „Whe‟, Andyka

„Cukong‟, Elise „Cicik‟, Sekar „Ika‟, Ian „Kutil‟, Arista „Oyob‟, Ogie, Dida, Putra,

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Priska, Amung, and Ester for kidnapping me from piles of papers and books. I owe Rifky „Qrick‟ my thanks too for letting me to hostage his headphone to collect and transcribe the data of my research. Next, I would also express my thankfulness to all of my friends of the class of ‟12, especially Yustin, Mbak Pepy, and Mbak Hari for sharing many things during the study. Lastly, I would not be able to mention one by one those other helpful people. Simply thank to all of them who have accompanied and taught me a lot until I finish my thesis and my study.

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TABLE OF CONTENTS TITLE PAGE ………………………………………………………………. APPROVAL PAGE ………………………………………………………... DEFENSE APPROVAL PAGE …………………………………………… STATEMENT OF ORIGINALITY………………………………………… LEMBAR PERNYATAAN PERSETUJUAN PUBLIKASI KARYA ILMIAH UNTUK KEPENTINGAN AKADEMIS ………………………... ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS ….…………………………………………….. TABLE OF CONTENTS …………………………………………………... LIST OF TABLES …………………………………………………………. ABSTRACT ………………………………………………………………... ABSTRAK ………………………………………………………………….

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CHAPTER I INTRODUCTION …………………………………………… A. Background ………………………………………………………........... B. Problem Identification …………………………………………………... C. Problem Limitation ……………………………………………………... D. Research Question …....…………………………………………………. E. Research Goals …………………………………………………….......... F. Research Benefits …………………………………………………..........

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CHAPTER II LITERATURE REVIEW…………………………………… A. Theoretical Review ………………………………………………........... 1. Novice Teachers ……………………………………………………. a. The notion of novice teachers ……………………………….…. b. Understanding novice teachers ………………………….……… c. Problems faced by novice teachers.……………….……….......... d. Support for novice teachers ….…………………………….......... 1) Source of support …………………………………………… a) Mentor………………………………………………….... b) Coworkers ………………………………………………. c) Family…………………………………………………… d) Perceived efficacy ………………………………………. 2) How to support novice teachers...…………………………… 2. Primary Level ………………………………………………….......... a. Bilingual education ………………………………………….….. b. Primary school in Indonesia …………………………………….. c. Primary level students characteristics………………..………….. d. Teaching English at primary level ……………………………… 3. Lived Experience …………………………………………………… 4. Review of Related Research ………………………………………... B. Framework of Pre-Understanding.……………………………………….

10 10 10 10 12 14 16 16 17 18 19 20 20 21 21 23 24 26 28 30 33

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CHAPTER III METHODOLOGY ………………………………………… A. Research Method ………………………………………………………... B. Data and Data Gathering Technique ……………………………………. 1. Nature of data and data collection techniques ………………………. 2. Setting ………………………………………………………………. 3. Participant …………………………………………………………... 4. Validation …………………………………………………………… C. Research Procedures …………..………………………………………... 1. Turning to a phenomenon of interest ...……………………………... 2. Investigating experience as we live in it rather than conceptualizing it …………………………………….……………………………….. 3. Reflecting on the essential themes which characterize the phenomenon ……..………………………………………………….. 4. Describing the phenomenon-the art of writing and rewriting.………. 5. Maintaining a strong and oriented relation to the phenomenon...…… 6. Balancing the research context by considering the parts and the whole ………………………………………………………………... D. Text Composition and Interpretation……………………………………. 1. Text composition…………………………………………………….. 2. Interpretation…………………………………………………………

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CHAPTER IV DESCRIPTION AND INTERPRETATION ……………... A. Description ……………………………………………………………… 1. Participants‟ background (prologue)………………………………… 2. Life after graduation ………………..……………………………….. 3. Joining the school where the participants work …………….............. 4. Orientation before teaching ...……………………………………….. 5. Dealing with administrative works for the first time ……………….. 6. The participants‟ first teaching ……………………………………… 7. Meeting with „special‟ kids …………………………………………. 8. Reminding and encouraging students to speak English …………….. 9. Participants‟ job besides teaching …………………………………... 10. Participants‟ metamorphose ………………………………………… 11. Participants‟ reason to stay teaching……............................................ 12. Wish (epilogue) ……………………………………………………... B. Interpretation ……………………………………………………………. 1. Initial belief.………………………………………………...……….. 2. Reality shock………………………………………………………… 3. Feeling.……………………………………….……………………… 4. Problem …………………………….……………………………….. 5. Support ………………………………………….…………………... 6. Struggle and adaptation ……………………………………………... 7. Current belief ……………………………………………………….. 8. Good time management …………………………………………….. 9. Autonomy …………………………………………………………… 10. Understanding children ……………………………………………...

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11. Creativity ……………………………………………………………. 100 12. Need ………………………………………………………………… 101 CHAPTER V CONCLUSIONS AND SUGGESTIONS ………………….. 103 A. Conclusions …………………………………………………………….. 103 B. Suggestions ……………………………………………………………... 106 REFERENCES …………………………………………………………….. 109 APPENDICES ……………………………………………………………... Appendix 1. Interview Questions Guideline ……………………………….. Appendix 2. Kiki‟s Interview Transcripts ...……………………………….. Appendix 3. Jalu‟s Interview Transcripts ………………………………….. Appendix 4. Participants‟ Consents ...………………………………………

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LIST OF TABLES Table 2.1 Table 2.2

Differences between Bilingual Education and Traditional Second- or Foreign Language Education …………………... 22 Younger Learners and Older Learners Characteristics …….. 25

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ABSTRACT Wardani, Adesia Kusuma. 2014. The Lived Experience of Novice English Teachers at a Primary Level. Yogyakarta: The Graduate Program in English Language Studies, Sanata Dharma University. When novice teachers entered their new working environments for the first time, they would likely face difficulties. They would experience the reality shock in which the ideal that they had formed during their pre-service education programs was different from the reality of classroom language. Furthermore, they would also find that there was a gap between the academic course content in the language teacher education program and the reality that they faced in the real language classroom. Because of that, novice teachers needed to adapt themselves in their new working place. Hence, I was interested to conduct a study on novice English teachers‟ lived experience particularly at the primary school. I chose primary school as the context of my study because of my interest on teaching English to young learners, my previous working experience as English teacher at the primary school, and the fact that not few novice English teachers met the demand of English teachers for children resulted from the mushrooming of primary schools in Indonesia which offered English as the medium of instruction and as subject to attract parents to enroll their children there. “What is the lived experience of novice English teachers at the primary level like?” was the research question investigated in this study. In doing this research I adopted an empirical phenomenological method which aimed to describe and interpret novice teachers‟ experience during their initial years of teaching. I involved two participants who were novice English teachers at a private bilingual primary school in Salatiga. I carried out in-depth interviews in order to obtain the data to compose the narratives. The narratives were composed based on the shared-events between the participants. The finding of the study was the descriptions of the participants‟ stories and the interpretation of it. The description of the participant stories were divided into twelve parts in order to make it more organized and easier to understand. Those twelve parts were: (1) participants‟ backgrounds; (2) their lives after graduation; (3) joining the school where they work now; (4) orientation before teaching; (5) dealing with administrative works for the first time; (6) their first teaching; (7) their meeting with „special‟ kids; (8) reminding and encouraging students to speak English; (9) their jobs besides teaching; (10) their metamorphose; (11) participants‟ reason to stay teaching; and (12) wish. The description of the participants‟ lived experience as novice English teachers at the primary school was then being interpreted to unveil the essential themes of their lived experience. The essential prefigured themes were: (1) initial belief; (2) reality shock; (3) feeling; (4) problem; (5) support; (6) struggle and adaptation; and (7) current belief. Moreover, the emergent themes were: (1) good time management; (2) autonomy; (3) understanding children; (4) creativity; and (5) needs.

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ABSTRAK Wardani, Adesia Kusuma. 2014. Pengalaman Hidup yang Dihayati oleh Para Guru Bahasa Inggris Pemula di Tingkat Sekolah Dasar. Yogyakarta: Kajian Bahasa Inggris, Program Pasca Sarjana. Universitas Sanata Dharma. Ketika guru-guru Bahasa Inggris pemula memasuki lingkungan tempat mereka bekerja untuk yang pertama kali, mereka akan menghadapi kesulitankesulitan tertentu. Mereka akan mengalami „reality shock‟ dimana mereka mulai menyadari bahwa hal-hal ideal tentang mengajar yang mereka bayangkan ketika mereka mengenyam pendidikan guru berbeda dengan realita yang sebenarnya. Kemudian mereka juga akan menyadari bahwa ada hal-hal penting untuk mengajar yang belum dipelajari saat mereka menempuh pendidikan guru. Oleh sebab itu, guru-guru Bahasa Inggris pemula ini perlu beradaptasi dengan lingkungan sekolah mereka yang baru. Menyadari hal ini, saya tertarik untuk melakukan penelitian tentang pengalaman hidup yang dihayati oleh para guru Bahasa Inggris pemula khususnya di tingkat sekolah dasar. Saya memilih tingkat sekolah dasar sebagai konteks penelitian saya karena ketertarikan saya akan pengajaran Bahasa Inggris untuk anak-anak, pengalaman bekerja saya sebagai guru Bahasa Inggris di sekolah dasar, dan juga realitas dimana tuntutan pasar akan guru Bahasa Inggris untuk sekolah dasar yang menawarkan Bahasa Inggris sebagai bahasa pengantar dan juga sebagai salah satu mata pelajaran dipenuhi oleh guru-guru Bahasa Inggris pemula. “Apa sajakah pengalaman hidup yang dihayati oleh para guru Bahasa Inggris pemula di tingkat sekolah dasar?” merupakan pertanyaan penelitian yang diselidiki dalam studi ini. Dalam penelitian ini, saya mengadopsi metode empirical phenomenological yang bertujuan untuk mendeskripsikan dan menginterpretasikan pengalaman para guru Bahasa Inggris pemula di periode awal mereka mengajar. Saya melibatkan dua orang partisipan dalam penelitian ini. Kedua partisipan saya adalah guru Bahasa Ingris pemula di sekolah dasar swasta di Salatiga yang menerapkan system dwi-bahasa. Saya melakukan wawancara mendalam kepada kedua partisipan saya untuk mendapatkan data penelitian ini. Berdasarkan hasil wawancara mendalam saya kepada para participant, saya menyusun narasi tentang pengalaman hidup mereka yang dihayati. Narasi disusun berdasarkan kesamaan peristiwa yang dialami kedua partisipan. Temuan dari penelitian ini adalah deskripsi dari pengalaman hidup para partisipan dan interpretasi dari cerita tersebut. Supaya cerita pengalaman hidup yang dihayati oleh para guru pemula di tingkat sekolah dasar dapat dipahami dengan mudah, deskripsinya dibagi menjadi dua belas bagian. Kedua belas bagian tersebut adalah: (1) latar belakang para partisipan; (2) kehidupan mereka setelah lulus; (3) bergabungnya para partisipan dengan sekolah dimana mereka bekerja; (4) orientasi sebelum mengajar; (5) mengerjakan tugas-tugas administrasi untuk yang pertama; (6) mengajar perdana; (7) berhadapan dengan anak-anak „spesial‟; (8) mengingatkan dan memotifasi anak untuk berbicara dalam Bahasa Inggris; (9) tugas-tugas selain mengajar; (10) metamorphosis mereka; (11) alasan mereka tetap bertahan untuk mengajar; dan (12) harapan.

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Deskripsi tersebut kemudian di interpretasikan supaya tema-tema essesiil dari pengalaman hidup yang dihayati oleh para guru Bahasa Inggris pemula di tingkat sekolah dasar dapat diungkap. Tema-tema essensiil yang sudah diduga terlebih dahulu adalah: (1) keyakinan awal tentang pengajaran; (2) reality shock; (3) perasaan; (4) permasalahan; (5) dukungan; (6) perjuangan dan penyesuaian; (7) keyakinan terkini tentang pengajaran. Kemudian, tema esentiil yang muncul kemudian adalah: (1) manajemen waktu yang baik; (2) otonomi guru; (3) pemahaman akan anak; (4) kreatifitas; dan (5) kebutuhuan.

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CHAPTER I INTRODUCTION

This first chapter provides the readers with an introduction to the research and what makes me interested in exploring this particular topic of research. It consists of six majors sections, namely (1) background, (2) problem identification, (3) problem limitation, (4) research question, and (5) research goal and (6) research benefits.

A. BACKGROUND Teaching is a lofty yet demanding, time-consuming, and often thankless job. Teachers have demanding work since they have to deal with complicated educational issues and practical demands of classroom teaching. According to Pollard (2008), when teachers harmonize their personal ideals, performance standards, practicalities, and wider educational concerns, they might find it difficult and overwhelming. Novice teachers in particular are likely to face unique difficulties with reconciling those things and also adaptation during the initial years of teaching. Huberman (1993) reveals that in their initial years of teaching, novice teachers experience the transformational process in which they undergo the real “learning to teach” process. In this transformational process from the state of “the learner” to the state of “the teacher”, novice teachers usually face what so called the “reality shock”. They have to face the reality of classroom life which is far

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different from what they have imagined during their pre-service education. During this transformational process in which novice teachers face the real classroom life, they often find difficulties and challenges. According to Kuzmic (1993) it is essential to understand novice teachers‟ experience in their initial years of teaching since it is a critical time for them which may determine their philosophy and attitude for the rest of their career. Likewise, Farrell (2008) mentions that many language teachers experience the “reality shock” during their initial years of teaching because they have to learn how to adapt and survive in a new school culture. He put that in their initial year of teaching, novice English teachers usually find that there is a gap between academic course content in language teacher preparation programs and the reality that they face in the real language classroom. Hence, understanding the actual experiences of novice English teachers is essential since it might be beneficial for designing teacher training programs which would better prepare the next generation of teachers, particularly their transition to employment (Farrell, 2008). Though understanding novice teachers‟ experience, in particular novice language teachers‟ experience, during their initial years of teaching is important, only few in-depth studies which elucidate their experience have been documented in the TESOL education literature (Farrell, 2008). Therefore, I am interested in studying novice English teachers‟ lived-experience during their initial years of teaching. In this study, my focus is on novice English teachers at bilingual primary school. I decided to study on novice English teachers at bilingual primary school because I am interested to the field of teaching English to young learners.

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Moreover, my first working experience as English teacher at primary level after leaving undergraduate college also provokes me to focus this study on novice English teachers at primary level. Another reason is the fact that not few novice English teachers meet the demand of English teachers for children resulted from the mushrooming of primary schools in Indonesia which offer English as the medium of instructions and as a subject to attract parents to enroll their children there. The post-modernism or post-method era leads to the idea of modern progressivism in which education should help human to progress more. New progressivism perspective proposes that “the goals of education are not defined in terms of particular ends or products, but in terms of the processes and procedures by which the individual develops understanding and awareness and creates possibilities for future learning” (Finney in Richards and Renandya, 2001:73). Moreover, Finney puts that the emphasis of progressivism is on concepts of learner needs, interest, and human progress that leads to self actualization of each human being. Expectedly, by conducting a study on the lived experience of novice primary English teachers, it would facilitate them to achieve their self actualization. Through their lived experience, novice primary English teachers might reflect on it in order to understand better, to be aware of, to improve themselves, and perform better in their job as primary English teacher. In other words, through the study of their lived experience, novice primary English teachers are encouraged to be autonomous. Pre-service language teachers and

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teacher educators might also reflect on it so that they would have better idea of the reality of classroom and thus could prepare better for employment. Furthermore, the school board and experienced teachers would also find it beneficial in order to understand the needs and the challenges of their new colleagues so that they could give appropriate support. For the common readers, they might get better and empathic understanding of the lived experience of novice primary English teachers so that they would humanize the job of primary English teachers, particularly the novice and language teaching.

B. PROBLEM IDENTIFICATION Introducing English to children has become great vogue across the world. Graddol (2006) reveals that: The age at which children start learning English has been lowering across the world. English has moved from traditional „foreign language‟ slot in lower secondary school to primary school-even preschool. The trend has gathered momentum only very recently and the intention is often to create bilingual population (p.88). Likewise, Pinter (2006) and Nokolov (2009) mention that now ever more and ever younger children are learning English and English is compulsory in primary education in many countries around the world. This great vogue results the mushrooming of primary schools in Indonesia which offer English as the medium of instructions and as a subject to attract parents to enroll their children there. The mushrooming of primary school which offers English as the medium of instructions and English as a subject in Indonesia results the high demand of English teachers for children. Undoubtedly, this high

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demand of English teacher for children is fulfilled by many novice English teachers who have just graduated from English teacher education program besides experienced teachers. In their initial year of teaching, novice teachers experience what Farrell (2008) calls as “reality shock”. Novice English teachers face the real classroom language which is far different from what they have form as ideals during their pre-service education. They usually find their initial year of teaching as a time of much difficulty because of factors such as problem with classroom management, the learning and teaching process, motivating students, assessment and evaluation, insufficient and inadequate material, instructional planning and pacing, the workload, and relationship with colleagues and parents (McCann & Johanessen, 2004). Leaving novice teachers on their own with much difficulties would make them become worse and leave the profession. Crookes (1997) and Peacock (2009) state that when novice teachers are left to survive on their own in difficulties, they will leave their job early in their careers. Because of that, novice teachers need guidance and support from experienced educators (Boss, 2001). Teachers in post-method condition, according to Kumaravadivelu (2006), should be autonomous since teacher autonomy is the heart of pos-method pedagogy. Teachers need to be encouraged, helped, and facilitated to be autonomous by promoting their ability to develop a reflective approach to their own teaching acts, how to initiate change in their classroom, and how to monitor the effects of such changes. Then, post-method teacher educator should not only transfer “a set of preselected and pre-sequenced body of knowledge” to the

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prospective teachers but also encourage and help the prospective teachers to be autonomous. Hence studying novice English teachers‟ lived experience during their initial year, in particular novice English teachers at primary level as my concern toward the global trend of lowering the age at which children learning English, is needed to elucidate what they experience, thought, feel, believe, need, and aware of. When a clear and comprehensible understanding of novice primary English teachers‟ lived experience is obtained from the descriptions of their experience, appropriate guidance and support for them could be prepared and provided. Moreover, in order to encourage, to help, and to facilitate novice primary English teachers to be autonomous, studying their lived experience is needed because it would enable them to be reflective and self-directed.

C. PROBLEM LIMITATION This study is limited to the lived experience of novice primary English teachers in Salatiga, Central Java, Indonesia who work at the private bilingual schools. Novice teachers in this study are defined as teachers who have just graduated from English Teacher Education study program and in their initial years of teaching. The initial years of teaching is defined as the period beyond practicum when the novice teachers move from teacher training institution to the real classroom to teach for the first time. In terms of time teaching, novice teachers in this study are teachers who have less than 3 years of teaching.

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This present study is an empirical

phenomenological research.

Phenomenological studies are, by nature, limited to the experiences of those who participate in the study. And although it is possible for readers to transfer the descriptions to other settings because of shared or similar situational characteristics (Creswell, 2007), generalization is not possible.

D. RESEARCH QUESTION In order to obtain meaningful description of phenomenon on novice primary English teachers‟ lived experience, the researcher has to formulate question which can help to get the description clearly. Moreover, the question here helps to frame the construction of interpretation so that the narration will be meaningful. Thus, the question is: “What is the lived experience of novice English teachers at the primary school like?”

E. RESEARCH GOALS This present study about the lived experience of novice primary English teachers is conducted to describe and interpret meaningful phenomenon experienced by novice English primary teacher during their initial year from the anecdote of the participants‟ lived experience. This study about novice primary English teachers‟ lived experience will bring significant and empathic understanding of the novice primary English teachers‟ adaptation and survival during the transmission process from college to real language classroom life.

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F. RESEARCH BENEFITS There will be two kinds of benefits offered in this present study: practical and scientific benefits. Practical benefits from this study are offered to the participants, the school board, experienced teachers, pre-service teachers, teacher educators, and the readers. This research, through in-depth interviews, would allow the participants to reflect on what they had experienced in their initial year of teaching. Through the texts or anecdote of the participants‟ lived experiences in their initial years of teaching English at primary level, the participants might learn a lesson from it and adjust themselves for improvement. In other words, it encourages, helps, and facilitates the participants to be autonomous teachers. Through the description and the interpretation of novice primary English teachers‟ lived experience during their initial years of teaching, the school boards and the experienced teachers in the same site with the participants might get comprehensible and empathic understanding about what their new colleagues face during their initial year of teaching. By inferring to the comprehensible and empathic understanding of the novice primary English teachers‟ lived experience the school board and the experienced teachers might provide appropriate support and mentoring for the novice teachers. Similarly, teacher educators might also infer to this description and interpretation to prepare and provide suitable teacher education program. Pre-service teachers may also get better idea of the real classroom language, so that they can prepare themselves for, reduce, or even overcome the “reality shock” when they enter their in-service teaching. Practical benefits would also be obtained by common reader from this study that is

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comprehensible and empathic understanding of the lived experience of novice primary English teachers so that they would be able to humanize the job of primary English teachers, particularly the novice and language teaching. In addition to its practical benefits, this present study also offers scientific benefits. The description and interpretation of participants‟ lived experience in teaching English at primary level during their initial years of teaching would become the property of the body of science which could contribute insight to the theory of English teacher education and development and teaching English to young learners, particularly in Indonesian context.

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CHAPTER II LITERATURE REVIEW

This second chapter presents the theoretical review and theoretical framework of the research. The construct and concepts related to the research are reviewed and clarified and then being used to formulate the framework of preunderstanding.

A. THEORETICAL REVIEW In this section, I would review and clarify concepts and constructs related to this research. Those concepts and constructs are (1) novice teachers; (2) primary level; and (3) lived experience. Furthermore, previous related studies are also being reviewed in this section.

1. Novice Teachers In this section (a) definition of novice teachers; (b) understanding novice teachers; (c) problems faced by novice teachers; and (d) supports for novice teachers are being reviewed and clarified. a. The notion of novice teachers Though in the studies of beginning teachers the term “novice” has been used frequently, Farrell (2012) mentions that there is no distinct definition of a novice teacher in the literature. In terms of time teaching, Farrell (2012) says that there is no full agreement as to the exact definition of when a teacher ceases to be

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novice. In some research articles on novice teachers, the time teaching of novice teachers can be from “as little as one year to as many as five years” (Farrell, 2012:437). For example, Kim and Roth (2011) reveal that novice teacher is defined as teachers with less than five years of teaching experiences by some researchers. In addition, Hayness (2011) mentions that some researchers refer to a teacher with two years of teaching experience or less as novice teacher. Based on the time teaching, Farrell (2012) sees three years of time teaching as realistic measurement for teachers to be considered as novice teachers. Farrell (2012) reveals that among the members of TESOL Quarterly editorial advisory board various definitions of novice teachers also emerge. Some board members suggest that novice teachers are “anyone teaching a new course for the first time” (Farrell, 2012:437). Other board members determine novice teachers as teachers who have entered “a new cultural context for the first time” (Farrell, 2012:437). Moreover, Farrell (2012:437) also mentions that there is also suggestion from the board members that novice teachers refer to “anyone who has received a second license or endorsement in English as a second language even though he or she may be an experienced teacher in other subjects”. Because of those varied definitions of novice teachers, Farrell (2012) realizes that what exactly a novice teacher is needs to be defined. When there is a clear definition about novice teachers, people who are interested for the issue on novice teachers would know exactly what could be included and not into novice teachers. Farrell (2012) define novice teachers as those who are sometimes called newly qualified teachers, who have completed their language teacher education program (including teaching 11


practicum), and have commenced teaching English in an educational institution (usually within 3 years of completing their teacher education program (p. 437). Based on Farrell‟s (2012) definition of novice teachers above, experience ESOL teachers who enter new culture or school context could not be considered as novice. Moreover, teachers who are returning to TESOL after many years off could not be considered as novice. Another important thing related to the definition of novice teachers is that age could not be used as the criterion. In other words, age does not have any relevance with novice (Farrell, 2012). For the purpose of this study, novice teachers are defined as teachers who have just graduated from English Teacher Education study program and in their initial years of teaching. In terms of time teaching, novice teachers in this study are defined as teachers who have less than three years of teaching. b. Understanding novice teachers When beginning teachers enter their in-service teaching, they start to experience the real “learning to teach” process. In this “learning to teach” process, novice teachers change their prior state of “the learner” into the state of “the teacher” (Huberman, 1993). During their real “learning to teach” process or their initial years of teaching, novice teachers usually faced with “culture shock” or “reality shock” (Veenman, 1984, Huberman, 1993, Farrell, 2006, Farrell, 2008, and Farrell, 2012). According to Veenman (1984:143) novice teachers experience the “reality shock” because of “the collapse of the missionary ideals formed during teacher training by the harsh and rude reality of classroom life”. Similarly, Huberman (1993) refers to the reality of classroom life which is very different from what 12


novice teachers envisaged during their pre-service education as the “reality shock” faced by novice teachers during their initial years. Likewise, Farrell (2012:211) also reveals that the “reality shock” faced by novice teachers is the time when novice teachers realize that “the ideals they formed while training may not be appropriate for the realism they are faced with during their first year of teaching”. Regarding to the “reality shock” faced by novice teachers, understanding novice teachers is crucial in order to rescue them from abandoning their job. Crookes (1997) and Peacock (2009) reveal that novice teachers are left to survive on their own in less than ideal conditions too often and it results some drop out of the profession early in their careers. In addition, Farrell (2012:436) reveals that many novice teachers are travelling alone without the guides and guardians decided to “abandon the teaching path before ever discovering the joys of teaching”. Therefore, novice teachers should be understood and should not be neglected on their own. Besides the “reality shock” in their initial years of teaching which might make them leave their profession, novice teachers need to be understood since what they experience in their initial years of teaching would determine their future practice. According to Karatas and Karaman (2013) the first years of teaching in teacher‟s career play a significant role in shaping their identity and future practice. Pitton (2006:2) also puts that “the success of new teachers is critically linked to their first teaching experiences and the opportunities they are given to talk through issues they face in the classroom”. Therefore, it is important to understand their struggle, survival, and adaptation during their initial years of teaching because

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when they were left alone with their challenges and start to fell ineffective, they believe that they are not suitable for the profession and quit their jobs. c. Problems faced by novice teachers During their initial years of teaching, novice teachers face with many problems and challenges (Pfister, 2006). The initial years of teaching is described as the discovery and survival phase of teaching by Huberman (1993). Others describe this first years of teaching as the period of uncertainty as “a sink-or-swim experience” since novice teachers are expected to take on many job responsibilities which they are not ready yet for (Huling-Austin et al., 1989). Odell and Ferraro (1992) describe this first period of teaching as vicious cycle during which novice teachers complain about the teaching workload. Problems which might arise during the novice teachers‟ initial years of teaching are classroom management, the workload, the learning and teaching process, motivating students, assessment and evaluation, insufficient and inadequate material, instructional planning and pacing (Calderhead, 1991; McCann & Johannessen, 2004). There are five main areas of novice teachers concern identified by McCann and Johannessen (2004): (1) knowledge of curriculum; (2) relationship with students, parents, colleagues, and supervisors; (3) workload or time management; (4) evaluation or grading; and (5) autonomy or control. Similarly, Calderhead (1991) mentions that besides curriculum, teaching techniques, and methods, novice teachers usually face problems related to relationship with other teachers.

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Among those problems faced by novice teachers in their initial years of teaching, working load and classroom management are the two most outstanding problems they struggle with (Veenman, 1984, Clift et al., 1995, Alexander and Galbraith, 1997, Crookes and Arakaki, 1999, and McCann and Johannessen, 2004). According to Veenman (1984) and Alexander and Galbraith (1997), classroom management is one of the main concerns of novice teachers during their initial years of teaching. Veenman (1984) particularly mentions five issues perceived by novice teachers in classroom management: (1) motivating students; (2) dealing with individual differences; (3) assessing students‟ work; (4) relations with parents; and (5) organization of class work. Working load is another problem faced by novice teachers during their first years of teaching besides classroom management. Crookes and Arakaki (1999) and McCann and Johannessen (2004) find that overwork associated with lack of preparation time is the main problem faced by novice teachers during their initial years of teaching which make them having apprehensive attitudes towards their professional development. Previously, Clift et al. (1995) also find that novice teachers are having so much heavy problems in their initial years since they are usually given the most demanding assignment, such as teaching difficult groups and completing paperwork assigned by administration, as well as an overload of teaching hours. Another problem faced by novice teachers when they enter their in-service teaching for the first time is adaptation. Goodwin (2008) mentions that beginning teachers face challenge of understanding and fitting into the culture of their new

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school. Similarly, Pfister (2006) says that besides the classroom-specific and school problems, novice teachers also face problems with adjusting themselves to new situations. d. Support for novice teachers Since beginning teachers face so many problems during their initial years of teaching therefore supports, and guidance need to be provided in order to rescue them from abandoning their professions. Fox and Singletary (1986) mentions that support is highly needed in this phase in order to confront any problems which may arise in the classroom and at school. Likewise, Boss (2001) maintains that novice teachers need guidance and support in their initial years of teaching. Below two constructs or concepts related to support for novice teachers: (1) sources of support and (2) how to support novice language teachers are being reviewed and clarified. 1) Sources of support During their initial years of teaching, novice teachers need to be supported to pass their crucial period in their career. Working environment, the school where they work, might be the support provider for novice teachers during their initial years of teaching besides personal support (Karatas & Karaman, 2013). In their summary of studies related to novice language teachers, Karatas and Karaman (2013) put mentors and coworkers as the support provided by the school. Then, the source of personal support could be from novice teachers‟ family and their perceived efficacy.

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a) Mentor Mentor is more experienced teacher who supports the novice teacher (Lindgren, 2004). The mentor and novice teacher or the mentee build a good relationship upon openness and confidentiality in which the experienced and judicious teacher and the novice meet regularly for discussion according to the needs of the novice (McGee, 2001). Importantly, a mentor is not a problem solver and not a judge of the novice‟s problems and opinion (Chubbuck, Clift, Allard, and Quinlan, 2001). According to them, the task of the mentor is to support the learning and reflective process of the novice. Likewise, Lick (1999) and Alred and Garvey (2000) emphasize that mentoring has a special goal to contribute to learning and thus the novice should be engaged and have a constructive selfawareness in order to make learning happen. Mentoring a novice teacher is different from supervision a student teacher (Lindgren, 2004). The task of the mentor is to listen, to support, and to develop the thinking of the novice for his or her constructive progress, not telling the right things to do nor the right answer. On the other hand, supervisor has to control the outcome of the students. Hence, a mentor is required to encourage novice to learn from their own experiences in order to develop a vision of good teaching (FeimanNemser, 2001). The mentor who is more experienced than the novice does not necessarily be a teacher who is way older than the novice. Man and Tang (2012:485) find that younger mentor is “a good source of emotional and practical support and is perceived as more approachable with more attainable suggestions”. Carter and

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Francis (2001) in Man and Tang (2012:485) also maintain that young mentor is “better at emphasizing and recalling what it is like to be a beginning teacher”. Hence, as the alternative, giving two mentors to guide and support the novice is suggested (Man and Tang, 2012). Those two mentors are the experienced mentor playing a more advice giving role and the relatively inexperienced mentor playing collaborative and empathetic role. Related to the mentoring as the support and guide provided by schools for their novice teachers, Man and Tang (2012) state that novice teachers need to be given time table which is novice-friendly. It aims to give much time for novice teachers to observe experienced people‟s classes and learn from them. Besides observing experienced people‟s classes, novice teachers need to be observe too in order to contribute to novice teachers‟ development not to assess their performance (Man and Tang, 2012). Man and Tang (2012) also mention that principal has a very important function in the process of mentoring novice teachers. If the principal does not recognize and support the mentors, this may limit mentors‟ effectiveness. In addition to valuing and supporting mentors, the principal should create opportunities for their training as well. In this way, mentors can contribute to novices‟ development process. b) Coworkers Colleagues are also the source of support which can be provided to the novice teachers. Brannan and Bleistein (2012) discover that supports from colleagues are useful for novice teachers. According to them, there are two kinds

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of support provided by colleagues: (1) pragmatic and (2) affective support. However, these kinds of supports are difficult to be distinguished. Brannan and Bleistein (2012:531) mention that “sharing ideas about teaching, classroom management, school policies, or logistics, as well as peer observation and sharing resources” are included to the pragmatic support provided by colleagues. While affective support are sharing experiences and offering encouragement. Farrell (2012) also emphasizes the role of colleagues in novice teachers‟ adaptation period. Farrell (2012) describes how a director while observing his class stood up and told him he was not teaching correctly. At that time he felt like going to leave his job because he thought he was not suited to be a language teacher. Fortunately, Farrell (2012) was rescued by his colleagues who acted as his guides and guardians. His colleagues boosted his morale and provided wise counsel (Farrell, 2012:436). From the description of his experience when he was a novice teacher, Farrell (2012) shows how important support from colleagues is. c) Family In their study, Brannan and Bleisten (2012) also found that family is one of the support providers for novice teachers. From their study, they reveal that family helps them to prepare materials for teaching such as purchasing supplies or organizing stapling papers. Furthermore, Brannan and Bleisten (2012) also reveal that helping a married novice teacher in taking care of the child so that they could work is also kind of helpful support for them. Similarly, Howard and Johnson (2004) and Day and Gu (2007) also maintain that family is one of support provider for novice teachers to cope with

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their problems and challenges. According to Howard and Johnson (2004) family caring aids novice teachers to cope with workplace challenges. Similarly, Day and Gu (2007) find that having a supportive family might enhance teachers‟ capacity to cope with workplace challenges. d) Perceived efficacy Self efficacy is the extent to which individuals believe they can organize and execute actions necessary to bring about a desired outcome (Bandura, 1997). Novice teachers‟ self efficacy played an important role in supporting their development as language teachers too (Faez and Valeo, 2012). From their study on 115 novice teachers‟ self efficacy and how it plays a role in supporting their development as language teachers, Faez and Valeo (2012) reveal that novice teachers‟ self efficacy particularly their perceived efficacy should not be neglected since novice teachers build on their perceived efficacy and it can predict success and commitment to work. Hence, novice teachers‟ perceived efficacy as one of the personal supports should be boosted in order to help novices to cope with problems and challenges during their initial years of teaching and thus they can perform better in teaching. 2) How to support novice teachers In order to support novice language teachers, Richards and Farrell (2005) suggest two kinds of strategies to assist novice teachers in dealing with their problems and retain them in the profession. Those strategies are institutional and individual strategies. The institutional strategies are providing sources for development, arranging visits to other schools, and providing time for ongoing

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reflections (Richards and Farrell, 2005). According to them, individual strategies are reflection, self-directed learning, and taking part in teacher support groups. Another way to support novice teachers is by encouraging them to share the challenges they face in their first years of teaching and tell other people about what the experience (Farrell, 2012). Thus, Farrell (2012) encourages second language educators to collect the stories novice teachers share about their first years of teaching. From what they have collected, a corpus of the story of novice teachers first years of teaching could be created. This would help novice teachers overcome the challenges they face and reflect on their own teaching experiences (Farrell, 2012). Similarly, Shin (2012) also reveals that by sharing their stories, novice teachers are able to reflect on their own teaching practices and it is empowering.

2. Primary Level In this section, constructs and concepts related to primary level particularly bilingual school are being reviewed and clarified. Those constructs and concepts are: (1) bilingual education; (2) primary school in Indonesia; (3) primary level students‟ characteristics; and (4) teaching English at primary level. a. Bilingual education Bilingual education at the elementary is defined as “education that aims to promote bilingual (or multilingual) competence by using both (or all) languages as media of instruction for significant portions of the academic curriculum” (Genesse, 2004:548). According to Genesse (2004) the distinctive characteristic or

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the hallmark of bilingual education is integrating language and academic instruction. In her book entitled Bilingual Education in the 21st Century: A Global Perspective, Garcia (2011) differentiates bilingual education and traditional education which teach a second or a foreign language. Below is the table of differences between bilingual education and traditional foreign- or second language education by Garcia (2011:26). Table 2.1 Differences between Bilingual Education and Traditional Second- or Foreign-Language Bilingual Education Overarching Goal

Academic Goal

Language Use Instructional Use of Language Pedagogical Emphasis

Educate meaningfully and some type of bilingualism. Educate bilingually and be able to function across cultures. Languages used as media of instruction. Uses some form of two/more languages. Integration of language and content.

Second- or ForeignLanguage Education Competence in additional language. Learn an additional language and become familiar with and additional culture. Additional language taught as subject. Uses target language mostly. Explicit language instruction.

According to Garcia (2011) the remarkable difference between bilingual education program and traditional second- or foreign-language program is that the traditional second- or foreign-language program teaches the language as a subject, whereas bilingual education teaches content through an additional language other than the children‟s home language. Garcia (2011) mentions that bilingual 22


education program uses the language which is other than children‟s mother tongue as a medium of instruction. Further, Garcia (2011) also emphasizes the aim of bilingual education is for developing multiple understandings about languages and cultures, and foster appreciation for human diversity through general education which is taught in two or more languages. For the purpose of this study, bilingual education is defined as education program which does not only to teach English in order to develop the students‟ foreign language competence but also to teach content through English or in other words using English as the media of instruction. Though English becomes the language instruction, Indonesian is still being used to teach certain subjects which cannot or too difficult to be delivered in English. b. Primary school in Indonesia According to Law No. 20/2003, primary school and lower secondary school belong to the basic education. Basic education itself is general education with a duration of nine years: six years in primary school or elementary education and three years in lower secondary school or junior secondary education. This basic education is compulsory for the Indonesian citizens and it is well known as “wajib belajar sembilan tahun” or nine years compulsory education. Seven until twelve year old children are required to attend Sekolah Dasar (SD) or primary school or elementary school. Primary school in Indonesia consists of six grades (grades 1 – 6). Primary schools in Indonesia are run either by the government (public school) or sectors (private schools). Nowadays, some private schools in Indonesia refer to themselves as “national plus schools”. National plus

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schools are schools which intend to go beyond the minimum government requirements, especially with the use of English as medium of instruction or having an international-based curriculum instead of the national one. For the purpose of this study, primary school which is chosen as the context of this study is private primary school which uses national plus curriculum. This private primary school is also a bilingual school which uses English as a media of instruction. Most of the subjects in that school are delivered in English, however certain subjects such as Bahasa Indonesia (Indonesian) and Pendidikan Kewarganegaraan (Civics) are delivered in Indonesian. Moreover, English in this kind of school is given more than time slot than English in regular primary school. The students in this school learn English 6 hours of lesson a week (1 hour of lesson is 35 minutes). c. Primary level students’ characteristics Children in primary level are those whose ages are ranged between 7 until 12 years. Young learner in this level of education have different characteristics from adult as follows: (1) they have unlimited physical energy which makes them often need to be physically active; (2) they have various emotional needs; (3) they are emotionally excitable; (4) they are at their early stage of schooling so that they are still developing conceptually; (5) they are still developing their first language literacy; (6) they learn slowly and easily to forget things; (7) they are self oriented; (8) they have excellent ability in imitating; and (9) they do not have the same kinds of motivation in learning language as adults (Brewster et al., 2004).

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Nunan (2011) classifies young learners into two: (1) younger learners and (2) older learners. Children at grade 1-3 are included into younger learners, while children at grade 4-6 are included into older learners. Nunan‟s (2011:2-3) identification of younger learners‟ and older learners‟ characteristics is presented in the table below. Table 2.2 Younger Learners and Older Learners Characteristics Younger learners

Older learner

They are at pre-school or in the first couple of years of schooling. Generally, they have a holistic approach to language which means that they understand meaningful messages but cannot analyze language yet. They have lower level of awareness about themselves as well as about the process of learning. They have limited reading and writing skills, even in their first language. They are more concerned about themselves than others. They have limited knowledge about the world. They enjoy fantasy, imagination, and movement.

They are well established at school and comfortable with school routines. They show growing interest in analytical approaches, which means that they begin to take an interest in language as an abstract system. They show a growing level of awareness about themselves as language learners and their learning. They have well-developed skills as readers and writers. They have a growing awareness of others and their view points. They have a growing awareness of about the world around us. They begin to show an interest in real life issue.

Children characteristics can also be identified through their developmental stages as they progress from birth to adolescence in which children‟s social; psychological; and intellectual development are build up through those four stages (Nunan, 2011). According to Jean Piaget, a Swiss developmental psychologist, children develop through four stages in gaining knowledge about world, from

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birth to adolescence: (1) sensori-motor stage; (2) pre-operational stage; (3) concrete-operational stage; and (4) formal operational stage. Children at primary level are already in the third stage, concreteoperational stage. Children in this stage are at age of 7 to 11 or 7 to 12 (Henniger, 2009 and Nunan, 2011). According to Henniger (2009), children in this stage are less egocentric and their ability to see other‟s perspective is gradually established. Furthermore, they are still developing their ability to think logically and also starting to make generalizations from the environment although it is limited (Henniger, 2009 and Nunan, 2011). d. Teaching English at the primary level Teaching English at primary level means teaching English to young learners whose ages are ranged from 7 to 12. Teaching English to young learners is not the same with teaching English to adults. The remarkable difference is the motivation owned by young learners and adults. Brewster et al. (2004) reveals that young learners do not have the same kinds of motivation as adults in learning English. Therefore, in teaching young learners, teachers need to engage them well in the learning process. Moreover, engaging children well in the learning process is needed since children‟s concentration span is shorter than adults (Brewster et al., 2004). It means that teachers need to create various attractive activities to engage the students in learning activities. Moreover, children have their unique characteristics and are still in their psychological and intellectual development. Hence the way English is taught to children should be different from adults. Related to the children‟s psychological

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and intellectual development, Nunan (2011) reveals that in designing learning activities and creating tasks and materials for children, their psychological and intellectual development and also their characteristics need to be considered. In addition, each child has their own learning styles which need to be considered too (Clarke, 2010). Therefore in designing learning activities, teachers need to vary the activities in order to suit to the students‟ learning styles. Classroom management in teaching English to young learners cannot be seen as a trivial thing since it will influence the smoothness of the overall teaching-learning activities. When the class and the students are under controlled, teacher can teach better and might achieve the teaching objectives well. Oliver and Reschly (2007) maintain that classroom management is important. They reveal that The ability of teachers to organize classrooms and manage the behavior of their students is crucial to achieving educational outcomes. Although sound behavior management does not guarantee effective instruction, it establishes the environmental context that makes good instruction possible (Oliver & Reschly, 2007:1). Hence, teachers need to have good classroom management skills in order to establish classroom context which enables learners to learn well. Assessment is a necessary part of teaching and learning though it may threaten the children since it is not suitable with their nature (Ioannou-Georgiou & Pavlou, 2003). Cameron says that assessment brings a strong “washback” effect on children lives which then can influence their interest and motivation in learning English. Therefore the methods and techniques of assessing young learners should be selected appropriately so that the assessment is valid, reliable, and fair.

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Teaching English to young learners is different from teaching English to adults and it cannot be seen as a trivial and easy job. Children might be very unpredictable during the teaching-learning process, sometimes they are nice, but sometimes they are spoiled, naughty, and egoistic. Therefore, English teachers for young learners should not only have good knowledge and techniques about teaching but also passion and patience in teaching children.

3. Lived Experience Dilthey (1985) in Van Manen (1990:35) suggests that “lived experience involves our immediate, pre-reflective consciousness of life: a reflexive or selfgiven awareness which is, as awareness, unaware of itself”. According to Dilthey (1985:223) as cited in Van Manen (1990), a lived experience does not confront him as something perceived or represented; it is not given to me, but the reality of lived experience is there-for-him because he have a reflexive awareness of it, because he possesses it immediately as belonging to him in some senses. Only in thought does it become objective. Furthermore, Dilthey (1985) in Van Manen (1990:36) also suggest that lived experience is “to the soul what breath is to the body”. According to Van Manen (1990:36) it is “the breathing of meaning”. Thus, lived experience has an essence or quality that could be recognized when we consciously retrospect on it. Then, Van Manen (1990:36) states that lived experience is “the starting point and end point of phenomenological research”. Phenomenology, according to Van Manen (1990:36) aims to transform lived experience into a textual expression of its essence – in such a way that the effect of the text is at once a reflexive re-living and a

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reflective appropriation of something meaningful: a notion by which a reader is powerfully animated in his or her own lived experience. For Hegel in Moustakas (1994:26), phenomenology refers to “knowledge as it appears to consciousness, the science of describing what one perceives, senses, and knows in one‟s immediate awareness and experience.” According to Husserl (1962) phenomenology as a research method is an in-depth process of reexamining the things themselves. Powers and Knapp (1995) put that phenomenology is a way of thinking about what life experiences are like for people and is primarily concerned with interpreting the meaning of these experiences. According to Creswell (2003) phenomenological research is a research in which the “essence” of human experiences concerning a phenomenon is identified. Phenomenon according to Moustakas (1994) is what appears in consciousness. Heidegger (1977:74-75) mentions that the word phenomenon comes from the Geek phanesthai. It means to flare up, to show itself, to appear. Moreover, the word phenomenon, according to Heidegger (1977:74-75), is constructed from phaino. Then, phenomenon means to bring to light, to place in brightness, to show itself in itself, the totality of what lies before us in the light of day. According to Husserl (1931:129) any phenomenon represents a suitable starting point for an investigation and it serves as the essential beginning of a science that seeks valid determinations that are open to anyone to verify. For the purpose of this study the lived experience of novice English teachers at the primary school in this study is defined as their past experience which has essence of meaning obtained or recognized from conscious reflection

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on it. The lived experience of novice English teachers in their initial years is the phenomenon of this study.

4. Review of Related Research According to Farrel (2006, 2008) the first years of teaching has been well documented in general education research, for instances: studies conducted by Bullough (1989, 1990, and 1997); Bullough and Baughman (1993); and Calderhead (1992). Recently, the first year of teaching has been recognized by language teacher educators as having enormous influence on the future development of language teachers (Farrell, 2006). Though, it is now crucial to study about novice teachers, “not many detailed studies outlining the experiences of language teachers in their first years of teaching have been documented in the TESOL education literature” (Farrell, 2006:212). For instances: Richards and Pennington (1998); Farrell (2006); Moore (2008); and Hayes (2008). Richards and Pennington (1998), in their study of five first-year teachers of English in Hong Kong, find that those teachers focus their attention on two main themes: (1) establishing their role and their relationship with the students, and (2) covering the required material and preparing for examination in their initial years of teaching. According to Richards and Pennington (1998), the focus of those first-years teachers diverge from their beliefs formed during their preservice education. It is happened because of number of factors, such as: the impact of larger classes, unmotivated students, examination pressures, a set syllabus, pressure to conform more experienced teachers, students‟ limited proficiency in

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English, students‟ resistance to new ways of learning, and heavy workloads. Study by Richards and Pennington (1998) shows that the reality of language classroom could change what teachers have formed as ideal during their pre-service education. Farrell (2006) conducts a study on how a new Singaporean teacher balances a delicate and sometimes conflicting role between learning to teach and learning to become a teacher within a local school with an established culture in a neighborhood secondary school in Singapore during his first year. In his study, Farrell (2006) uses a story framework (orientation-complication-result). Farrell (2006) founds three major challenging situations faced by his participant: (1) teaching approach; (2) course content; and (3) collegial relationship. Moreover he also indentifies his participant responses with each challenging situation as he struggle to establish himself as a teacher. A study on a Cambodian English teacher‟s first year of teaching in Cambodian high school is conducted by Moore (2008). He describes the first-year experience of a Cambodian teacher who is trained to teach English in local secondary schools but ends up teaching on the Bed (TEFL) program she has just graduated from. Based on his participant‟s experience, it is revealed that she has two kinds of issues: (1) institutional issues and (2) personal issues. The institutional issues are: (1) the program‟s transition from being taught by native English speakers to being taught by Cambodians; (2) the introductions of a student‟s contribution fee which created unrest among the students. The personal issues include: (1) the pride and responsibility associated with being a university

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lecturer; (3) teaching classes in class in which many students had not done their homework; (4) dealing with trouble-makers; and (4) the resistance of some students to the communicative teaching methodology. Besides revealing the issues faced by the participant, Moore (2008) also describes how she overcomes those issues and how she helps her students learn. Another study is a study on Thailand teachers in their first years of teaching conducted by Hayes (2008). The participants of his study are four novice teachers who have never experienced any formal induction in their first year. In his study, Hayes (2008) documents how those four Thai teachers undergo their first year of teaching using a life history research method. Based on his documentation, he argues that new teachers need to be prepared for the reality of the classroom during training program and on-the-job guidance in dealing with school structures and collegial relationship would be reduce some of the burdens face by teachers. Most of the previous studies on novice teachers‟ experiences during their initial years of teaching in TESOL context are case studies which only reveal the problems and challenges faced by them. Hence through this present study I want to not only reveal novice teachers‟ problems and challenges during their initial years of teaching English but describe their lived experience by conducting a phenomenological

research,

particularly the

hermeneutic

one.

Through

hermeneutic phenomenological research, the participants‟ meaningful experiences which they could reflect on could be described. Then form the description, their

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feelings, awareness, beliefs, problems, challenges, and thought could be elucidated.

B. FRAMEWORK OF PRE-UNDERSTANDING Constructing a framework for research is important since it serves as the main guidance for a research (Creswell, 2003). Since this study, is a phenomenological research in which “the essence of human experiences concerning a phenomenon” (Creswell, 2003:15) is identified, the framework is also formed as the pre-figured themes. The theoretical framework or preunderstanding of the lived experience of novice English teachers at primary level is formulated as follows. Novice English teachers are teachers who have just graduated from English Teacher Education study program and in their initial years of teaching which is still less than three years. When they first enter their in-service teaching, novice teachers bring the ideals that they formed during their pre-service education. The ideal that they have formed during their pre-service education could be a set of beliefs about teaching English to young learners. However, when they start teaching in the real language classroom they might experience the “reality shock” in which they face reality which is far different from the ideal that they formed duting their pre-service education and then they start to realize that there is a gap between what they learnt in the pre-service education program and the reality of classroom language or their in-service teaching (Farrel, 2012).

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Therefore initial belief becomes the first theme and reality shock becomes the second theme. Novice English teachers might feel sad, depressed, and stressful during their initial years of teaching since the reality is far different from what they have envisaged during their pre-service education. Many problems might arise during their initial years, such as: adaptation with the new school environment, classroom management, workload, learning and teaching process, evaluation and grading, relationship with students, parents, colleagues, and supervisors, and any other problems (Calderhead, 1991; McCann &Johannessen, 2004). Hence, feeling or what novice teachers fell in their initial years is the third theme, while problem is the fourth theme. When novice teachers are being left alone with their problems, they would feel that they are not suitable for the job and start thinking to leave the job (Crookes, 1997; Peacock, 2009; Farrel, 2012). The institution where they work might realize this and then provide support for them. The support provided by the environment or the school where they work can be sharing and mentoring (Karatas & Karaman, 2013). Through sharing and mentoring, novice teachers receive support from their mentor and coworkers. If the school where they work does not provide any support for them, they might get support from their family (Karatas & Karaman, 2013). Moreover, novice teachers‟ perceived efficacy also might boost them to survive (Brannan and Bleisten, 2012). Thus, support becomes the fifth theme.

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Besides that, novice teachers‟ might also employ their personal strategies to cope with problems during their initial years of teaching (Richards & Farrel, 2005). They might have self reflection and self-directed learning as their personal strategies. They could see and reflect from what they have done and then take the lesson from it to improve themselves. In other words novice teachers also have their own strategies to struggle and to adapt in their new school. It makes struggle and adaptation becomes the sixth theme then. Novice teachers‟ experience in their initial years of teaching might determine their philosophy and attitude for the rest of their career (Kuzmic, 1993). Furthermore, the first year of teching in teachers‟ career played significant role in shaping their future practice (Karatas and Karaman, 2013). The up and down of novice teachers‟ experience during their initial years might make them either abandon their job or make them keep teaching (Farrel, 2012). Hence, when they survive, what novice teachers have experienced might shape and change their initial beliefs about teaching English at primary level. Because of that, current belief becomes the last theme.

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CHAPTER III METHODOLOGY

This chapter discusses the methodology and the procedures that would be employed in this research. It was essential to this research since it elaborated the appropriate steps of how to answer the research question systematically. Hence the elaboration in this chapter covers four major parts, namely (1) research method, (2) data and data gathering techniques, (3) research procedures, and (4) text composition and interpretation.

A. RESEARCH METHOD This research was a qualitative research, particularly empirical phenomenological research which aimed to describe and interpret novice teachers‟ experience during their initial years of teaching. This study was a qualitative research because it took place in natural setting, was fundamentally interpretive, and put the researcher to view the social phenomenon holistically (Creswell, 2003:181-183). It was a phenomenological since it described the participants‟ lived experience and described the meaning of the experience without “offering casual explanations or interpretive generalization” (Van Manen, 1990:54). It was also empirical because it “involved a return to experience in order to obtain comprehensive description that provided the basis for a reflective structural analysis that portrayed the essence of the experience” (Moustakas, 1994:13). In this study, the lived experience of interest was the participants‟ up and down

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experience in their first 3 years of teaching English at a private bilingual primary school in Salatiga, Central Java, Indonesia. Phenomenology was a method which procedures “involve studying a small number of subjects through extensive and prolonged engagement to develop patterns of relationship of meaning” (Moustakas, 1994 as cited in Creswell, 2003:15). Therefore, in conducting this study I involved two participants who were willing to have an extended engagement to tell their experience during their initial years of teaching and to develop narrative stories of their experiences. In order to obtain the data or the lived experience of novice teachers in teaching English at primary level, I carried in-depth interviews with the participants. Narrative stories resulted from in-depth interviews was then categorized. After that, novice primary English teachers‟ lived experiences were described and interpreted based on the categorization.

B. DATA AND DATA GATHERING TECHNIQUES The elaboration in this section covers (1) nature of data and data collection techniques; (2) setting; (3) participant; and (4) validation. 1. Nature of data and data collection techniques All of the data needed to conduct this research would be in the form of texts, particularly narrative stories (anecdote). The texts were obtained from indepth interviews. In-depth interviews were conducted in an informal atmosphere outside the work area and working hour so that the participants and I felt more comfortable. When it was not possible to have face to face meeting, with the

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participants, I sometimes interviewed my participants through facebook and whatsapp. The interviews were taped and transcribed in order to transform the data into text form. The interviews were conducted several times in order to get thick data or to get the richness of the texts. Since the data obtained from the interviews was essentials, good instrument to collect data was needed. The instrument of this research was interview guideline which was built based on the theoretical review and pre-understanding (Appendix 1). 2. Setting This research was conducted in the context of private primary school in Indonesia which used national plus curriculum. This private primary school was also a bilingual school because English was also used as a media of instruction for any other subjects. The school was located in Salatiga, Central Java, Indonesia. In this kind of school, students studied English 6 hours of lesson in a week. Teaching and learning process in that school was supported with some facilities such as: AC, LCD projector, and white board in each class and a library. 3. Participants The participants of this study were two novice primary English teachers. They were chosen by certain criteria such as: (1) the participants have just graduated from English Teacher Education study program; (2) the participants were still in their initial years of teaching; (3) the participants had less than 3 years of teaching; and importantly (4) the participants were willing to have an extended engagement to tell their experience during their initial years of teaching and to develop narrative stories of their experiences.

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As Creswell (2007) and Moustakas (1994) stated that a phenomenological study required a researcher to provide a consent signed by the participants and researcher as a legal contract and for the validity of the data obtained from the participant. I asked my participants to sign a consent stating her willingness to participate and thus I could use their real name in the research. My first participant was Kiki Kurniawati. She graduated from English Teacher Education study program in March, 2012. She started working as English teacher at primary level since June, 2012. My second participant was Febriyant Jalu Prakosa. He graduated from English Teacher Education study program in July, 2013 and started working as teacher at primary level in October, 2013. Kiki and Jalu worked in the same school but different class or grade. Kiki taught grade 3 and 4, while Jalu taught grade 2. 4. Validation Validation was essential for qualitative research since it dealt with the accuracy of the findings. In order to validate the data, I requested each of my participants to carefully examine the description of their lived experiences so that additions and corrections could be made (Humphrey, 1991 in Moustakas, 1994:111). Creswell (2012) suggested researchers to employ at least two validation strategies in conducting qualitative research. Therefore, I decided to have thick description of the participants‟ lived experiences besides member checking. I composed the narratives of my participants‟ lived experience in rich detail in order to reach the thick description of it.

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C. RESEARCH PROCEDURES In conducting this research I did what Van Manen (1990) suggested. I adapted Van Manen‟s six methodological procedures. 1. Turning to a phenomenon of interest Firstly, I tried to find the topic that interested me to investigate. After I found the topic, I collected the information needed to support the significance of my research in order to formulate my research problem. Following that, I determined the participants who were willing to help me conduct the research and the research setting. Then, through library research, I gathered the theories and to review previous related research. Library research was done in order to review and clarified the concepts and constructs related to the research so that preunderstanding could be formulated. 2. Investigating experience as we live in it rather than conceptualizing it As a researcher, I needed to investigate experience as living in it (Van Manen, 1990). Hence, I also gathered my own experiences as a novice English teacher for primary students in order to be able to elaborate the participant‟s stories more comprehensively during the in-depth interviews. The in-depth interviews were used to obtain the data for this research. Interview guideline was built based on the theoretical review and pre-understanding in order to enable the researcher to be able to elaborate all essential points.

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3. Reflecting on the essential themes which characterize the phenomenon When all of data had been gathered or obtained, I could analyze essential pre-figured and emergent themes. Those essential pre-figured and emergent themes could be use as the reflection for the researcher and participants to perform and actualize ourselves better. 4. Describing the phenomenon-the art of writing and rewriting The aims of this research were for describing and for interpreting participants‟ stories during their initial years of teaching. Hence, I needed to write and rewrite the narratives. The write and rewrite process required me and the participants to have reflection of the research by doing the re-interviews to synchronize all the information and stories to enhance the accountability and trustworthiness of the research result. Moreover, I always presented the narrative stories to the participants so that they could check whether the narratives were acceptable or not. 5. Maintaining a strong and oriented relation to the phenomenon When all of the data had been obtained, I could analyze them and wrote them. After that, I interpreted them into some themes of phenomenon. The essential meanings of the participants‟ lived experience during their initial years of teaching English at the primary level could be interpreted from those themes of phenomenon. Thus, I needed to be not to indulge in wishy-washy speculations, to become enchanted with narsistic reflections or self-indulgent preoccupations in the process of gathering the data in order to be able to capture the essence.

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6. Balancing the research context by considering the parts and the whole In order to balance parts and whole, I did what Van Manen suggested in balancing it. In writing, I sometimes stepped back and looked back at the total, at the contextual givens and how each of the parts needs to contribute toward the total.

D. TEXT COMPOSITION AND INTERPRETATION Van Manen (1990) revealed that the notion of “data” was ambiguous within the perspective of human science. Related to phenomenology, Van Manen explained that data or datum meant something given or granted. It meant that experience was given to us in every life. Thus, the data in this study was the text. Below, I elaborated how I composed the text and interpreted it. 1. Text composition Text or data in this study was obtained from the in-depth interviews. The interviews were being transcribed into verbatim transcript. Then, I tried to capture the shared-events between my participants based on the verbatim transcript. Identifying the shared-events would help me to make the organization easier. Based on the transcript and the shared-events, I composed the narratives. 2. Interpretation After describing the lived experience of novice primary English teachers, the interpretation process was conducted. I interpreted the text based on the prefigured themes and emergent themes.

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CHAPTER IV DESCRIPTION AND INTERPRETATION

In this chapter texts are gathered, organized, and composed into narratives and then interpreted. I divided this chapter into two major parts: (1) description and (2) interpretation. In the first part, description, I described my participants‟ stories of teaching English at primary level during their initial years of teaching. In the second part, interpretation, I interpreted the stories based on the pre-figured themes and emergent themes.

A. DESCRIPTION In this section I would describe my participants‟ lived experiences during their initial years of teaching English at primary level. In order to make the narrative of the participants‟ lived experiences more organized and easier to understand, I divided the story (anecdote) into several parts: (1) participants‟ backgrounds (prologue), (2) their lives after graduation, (3) joining the school where they work now, (4) orientation before teaching, (5) dealing with administrative works for the first time, (6) their first teaching, (7) their meeting with „special‟ kids, (8) reminding and encouraging students to speak English, (9) their jobs besides teaching, (10) their metamorphose, (11) participants‟ reason to stay teaching, and (12) wish (epilogue).

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1.

Participants’ backgrounds (prologue) In this study, I involved two participants, Kiki and Jalu, who both were my

juniors when I was in undergraduate program. Kiki Kurniawati or Kiki, my first participant, was a 24 year-old female. She was born on March, 29 1989 in Salatiga. While Jalu or Febriyant Jalu Prakosa, another participant in this study, was a 22 year-old male. Jalu was born on February, 28 1989 in Salatiga. Jalu was the only child in his family, while Kiki was the second daughter in her family. Kiki has a sister who was 8 years older than her. Both of my participants had not married yet and still lived with their parents. Jalu lived in Salatiga with his parents. However, his father only stayed at home during weekend, since he worked at PT. Kartabina in Kaliwungu, Semarang. During weekdays, Jalu lived with his mother, a home maker who also opened a food stall at home. Likewise, Kiki only lived in Salatiga with her parents because her sister who was a nurse was already married and lived with her husband. Kiki‟s father worked as a PNS (civil servant) at DLLAJR while her mother was a home maker who also made some snacks to be sold for additional income. Both of the participants completed their education in Salatiga. Kiki and Jalu were studying at the same English Teacher Education study program in Salatiga. Kiki started studying there in 2007, while Jalu in 2009. English Teacher Education study program was not Kiki‟s main choice to study after graduated from Senior High School. Kiki had two options at that time, whether studying mathematics in the faculty of science and mathematics or studying English in

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English Teacher Education study program. She decided to study at English Teacher Education study program because of her sister‟s suggestion that English would ease her to get job later than mathematics. Different from Kiki, Jalu decided to study at English Teacher Education study program because it was his main preference to continue his education after graduated from Senior High School. English Teacher Education study program became Jalu‟s main option because that was the only program which matched with him and located in Salatiga. As his father worked out of the town and his mother was only being accompanied with him at home, Jalu did not have any reason to not study at Salatiga. Hence he studied at an English Teacher Education study program at a well-known university in Salatiga. Kiki and Jalu finished their undergraduate study program on time. After 4 until 4.5 years studying there, both of them graduated and got their degree of Sarjana Pendidikan. Kiki graduated in March, 2012, while Jalu graduated in July 2013. 2.

Life after graduation After graduated from English Teacher Education study program, both Kiki

and Jalu were in quest of what they want to be. Teaching was not their dream job. Trying to find other professions than teaching led them to the journey of jobseekers. During their few months after graduation many application letters had been sent to not few job vacancies. Some were replied and followed up with jobinterview, some were not.

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Kiki did not dream to be a teacher though she graduated from an English Teacher Education study program. In her opinion at that time, people tended to underestimate teacher‟s job. People saw teacher as a profession which did not need particular or specific skills, whereas actually being a teacher was not such a trivial job. Kiki revealed that: Many people think that being a teacher is a trivial job. Being a teacher seems to be a job which does not require any particular or specific skills. When we are being asked about what we want to be after graduated and then we tell them that we want to be a teacher, people will underestimate us. People underestimate teacher because they think that being a teacher is easy, teacher‟s job is only teaching, teacher does not have any burden, teacher always goes home early, teacher has longer holiday like the students do, but actually teacher has piles of works besides teaching. (Interview3_K8) Because of that, Kiki did not apply for jobs as a teacher after graduated. She looked for other jobs than teaching. Kiki had applied for jobs at companies in around Semarang and Solo. Kiki had ever sent her application letter to a batik company at Solo. It was replied and followed up with a psycho test, but she did not pass the psycho test. Kiki also had ever passed a job interview and accepted at a stock company in Semarang. Though she was accepted, Kiki did not take that job. She did not take that job because the company was not bona fide enough and Kiki did not sure to work there. While waiting for the desirable job, Kiki worked as a part time English teacher in an English course near her house. At that time, she taught around 5 to 10 students. They were grade 2 and grade 4 students. Similarly, Jalu also did not put teacher as the ultimate profession that he wanted to be after graduated. Since he studied at English Teacher Education study

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program, he understood that teacher‟s job was not trivial. He viewed teacher as a job which has many things to do besides teaching and then Jalu thought that he did not suit with that job. … because I studied at English Teacher Education study program, I know that being a teacher is not easy, teacher has many things to do which are complicated, and I am not that kind of people who are keen to do that kind of job. I am kind of person who like to do practical things so that I want to look for a job which is practical too, a field work or else. (Interview3_J15) Moreover, Jalu viewed teaching less challenging since he already knew what teachers should do and thus it made him tried to find another job which was more challenging than teaching. Hence, Jalu applied for any other jobs than teaching. One of them was at a food company in Salatiga. He had passed the first and the second job-interview but there was no any further confirmation up to now. Working as an admin was also interested him because it required him to be fluent in written and oral English. Hence Jalu applied a job as an admin at an English course in Solo. He passed the first job-interview as an admin, but he did not come for the second jobinterview because he already accepted in the school where he worked now. Besides applying jobs here and there, Jalu also had a part-time job at that time. Jalu had been a part-time English teacher at an English course in Salatiga. He taught English to Senior High School students, ESP to the college students, and also TOEFL preparation. Furthermore, he also had ever been a volunteer in a private bilingual pre-school in Salatiga. He became an assistant teacher in that pre-school.

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3.

Joining the school where they work Jalu and Kiki were working at the same private primary school in Salatiga.

This primary school was a bilingual school which applied national plus curriculum. The journey of finding their desirable job led Jalu and Kiki to their supposed job, English teacher. It was a profession which they were qualified at since they graduated from an English Teacher Education study program. Been through in the battle of jobseekers, Kiki realized and thought that her actual expertise was in teaching English. She was afraid if she had to learn from the beginning when she decided to work at a certain company. Kiki also thought that working at the company would be monotonous and would fade her English proficiency away. I have ever applied for jobs in several companies before, but then I think my expertise is in teaching English. If I work in a company, it would be monotonous and would require me to learn from the beginning. Surely, my English skills would not be use much like what my friends who do not work as teacher experience. (Interview1_K3) Hence, she started to change her horizon in seeking for jobs. She swerved from looking for jobs in companies to teaching. Kiki tried to apply for a job as teacher at an international primary school in Semarang but she was refused because of her religion. Not long after that, Kiki received a text message from the school where she worked now which informed her about a job vacancy as an English teacher there. Then she sent her application letter to that school and was being invited for the job-interview. Actually Kiki applied for a job as English teacher at the pre-school; however the school principal took her as the candidate for English teacher at

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primary level by considering her ability and any other things. After being interviewed and did micro teaching, she was called and told that the school accepted her as primary English teacher at that school. Slightly different from Kiki, though Jalu wanted to find job in different field from teaching, he did not limit himself to only apply job other than teaching. He also applied for a job as teacher because he liked to teach and he did not want to pass the opportunity approaching him. Thus, applying job as an English teacher was part of his quest for job. Since I like teaching and the opportunity to be a teacher is approaching me, thus I take that. Moreover, I do not want to be unemployed too long after graduated. I want to search for working experiences so that I can use it as my sale value for the next or other job application. (Interview1_J5) Being a PNS (civil servant) ever interested Jalu. Thus, he had ever applied for a job as a language instructor at Disnakertrans in Yogyakarta. Jalu passed the first selection which was the administrative selection, but then he did not come for the test because he had already accepted in the school where he worked now. Jalu got the information of a job vacancy as English teacher in that school from his girlfriend. Then, he applied for a job as English teacher at Junior High School. Similar with Kiki, he was put at different position from what he wished. However, the consideration of placing Jalu at primary level was not similar with Kiki. Jalu was placed at primary level since the position of English teacher at Junior High was already filled with another candidate. Similar with Kiki, Jalu also passed the job-interview and micro teaching first, before accepted as English teacher at that school.

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4.

Orientation before teaching Following the process of job-interview and micro teaching was the

introduction to the job description and then the school and administrative orientation for the new teachers. After both of my participants passed the jobinterview and micro teaching, they were invited to come to the school to meet with the school principal, the secretary of school boards, and the head of the school boards. In that meeting they were told that they were accepted and they would be responsible for teaching what subjects at what level. Kiki who started working there from June, 2012 was responsible to teach English at grade 2 both of grade 2 Glowing and grade 2 Sparkling and became the assistant of homeroom teacher of grade 2 Glowing also. As an English teacher, Kiki‟s duty were teaching and doing the administrative works. As the assistant of homeroom teacher, she helped the homeroom teacher to lead morning service for students in the class, to supervise students during snack time and lunch time, and then to watch students during dismissal. Different from Kiki, Jalu did not start working in that school right from the beginning of new school year. He started working in October, 2013. Jalu replaced the previous teacher who were left job during the probation. … the previous teacher was still in the probation. If the teacher is considered qualified enough to teach there, he or she would be hired for a year. The trial period is 3 months. If the teacher does not show any improvement during 3 months probation but the school boards view that the teacher has such potency, the trial period is extended into 6 months.

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However, after 3 months addition of probation, the teacher would be fired if he or she does not show any improvement. Actually I don‟t really know the exact case, but what I heard is that the previous teacher thought that she was qualified enough and thus she felt disappointed that her probation was being extended. Because of that she quitted. (Interview3_J17) Since the previous teacher quitted, the position of English teacher at grade 2 was empty and a new teacher was urgently needed to replace it. And Jalu was the lucky person who filled that empty position. In his meeting with the school principal, the secretary of the school boards, and the head of the school boards, Jalu was explained about his job and responsibilities. Jalu was assigned to teach English at grade 2 both of grade 2 Glowing and Sparkling and to teach Christian Education at grade 3 Glowing and Sparkling and also grade 4 Glowing and Sparkling. Besides that, Jalu also had responsibility as PIC of swimming. Similar with Kiki, as a subject teacher, Jalu had responsibilities to teach and to deal with the administrative works related to the subject. However, Jalu was responsible for two subjects; English and Christian Education. Because both of Kiki and Jalu were novice English teachers, they did not know and did not have any knowledge of what kinds of administrative works they should deal with in that school. Hence, after meeting with the school principal, the secretary of the school boards, and the head of the school boards, they met with the vice principal to listen to the explanation of what kinds of administrative works they should do besides teaching. The administrative works which they should handle were: annual program (prota / program tahunan); semester program (promes / program semester); syllabus; lesson plan; monthly schedule

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(mos); summary of teaching material; grading; score test analysis; report card checklist; quiz and test scope and items (kisi-kisi soal); and making questions for quiz, monthly test, and final test. Kiki, who started working the school in June, 2012 had the chance to join one week training about new teaching materials for math and science and also about administrative works before the first day of school in new school year started. Besides training, Kiki also joined 3 days orientation with the students in the beginning of the new school year in order to get close to the students and to familiarize the students with the school routines. However, Kiki deplored for she did not get the chance to observe the students when they were in the class studying with the teacher. From the first time I joined this school, I did not get any opportunity to observe the students during the teaching and learning process because I was badly needed to fill the position of the English teacher as soon as possible. Unable to observe the students made unable to get a clear picture of how to handle children during the lesson. Because of that, I became terribly stressed. (Interview3_K32) Unlike Kiki, Jalu who joined this school not from the beginning of new school year did not get any opportunity to join any training and orientation days with the students. Jalu only met with the vice principal after meeting with the school principal, the secretary of the school boards and the head of the school boards to get the explanation about what administrative works which should be done by him. However, Jalu got the opportunity to observe the students when they were studying in the class. After he had been accepted, Jalu were given the

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opportunity to observe teacher who teach English and Christian Education at grade 1. 5.

Dealing with administrative works for the first time As English teachers, Jalu and Kiki understood well that they were

responsible to teach English to the students. However, dealing with so many administrative works had not ever been envisaged before. They only knew that teacher was responsible for making lesson plan, making questions for test, and grading. Other administrative works such as annual program (prota / program tahunan); semester program (promes / program semester); syllabus; monthly schedule (mos); summary of teaching material; score test analysis; report card checklist; and quiz and test scope and items (kisi-kisi soal) were never been imagined before. At the beginning I actually was shocked knowing that I had so many things to do. I have never thought before that teacher has many things to do. I guessed other schools do not assign their teachers to do these piles of work. Then, I realized that being a teacher is not as easy as what we thought before. Teacher‟s job is not only teaching. There are so many things to do besides teaching. Though I got shocked at first, I do enjoy it. (Interview2_J17) Annual program (prota / program tahunan) and semester program (promes / program semester) were the prior administrative works which Jalu and Kiki should make. Making annual and semester program were new for both of them. Kiki ever revealed she never learnt about how to make those programs when she was in undergraduate study program. Similarly, Jalu also maintained that he did not ever study about how to make annual and semester program before at the college.

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Kiki learnt how to make annual and semester program from the vice principal and school training that she joined before the new class year started in 2012. Slightly different from Kiki, Jalu who joined the school in around the first mid-term semester of 2013 school year, learnt how to make annual and semester program from the vice-principal only. Though making annual and semester program had never been studied previously at their college, Kiki and Jalu could grasp the key concept of those programs and thus knew what they should do. Kiki told me that At that time, the vice principal who was also the coordinator of the curriculum told me how to make annual and semester program. Prota (annual program) is like an annual program which is comprised of indicators, learning materials, and the time allocation. For me, prota is conceivable and feasible. Not much different from prota, promes is comprised of indicators but with detail time allocation. Though it was not taught at the college, I could more or less conceive of what and how to make them. (Interview3_K45) Likewise, Jalu revealed that Though when I was studied at the college I had never learnt how to make prota and promes, I could grasp the idea of how to make those programs easily since it is simple actually. It is like making the plan for the time allocation for each learning material based on each basic competence and each standard competence… ya at last I could understand and make it. (Interview2_J18) The so called “learning by doing” was experienced by Kiki and Jalu when they dealt with annual and semester program. Learning from the previous annual and semester program was one of their strategies to handle those administrative works. Jalu revealed that a good filing system in the school helped him much. The

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previous annual and semester program which were kept and organized well in the library could be used as the examples. Luckily, the school has a good filing system. The files of annual and semester program made by the teachers are kept well there. Even the files of the previous teacher which I replace are there. Because of that, I could learn how to make annual and semester program from it. (Interview2_J16) Besides learning by doing, in making annual and semester program Kiki and Jalu were helped by the vice principal who was also the curriculum coordinator. They preferred to asked and consulted to the vice principal about how to make annual and semester program, because the vice principal was also an English teacher and graduated from the same English Teacher Education study program with them. I made annual and semester program by considering teaching materials that I should teach based on the textbook and then I consulted it to the vice principal who was also the coordinator of the curriculum. He graduated from English Teacher Education study program too. He liked to give me suggestions “Miss Kiki, it would be better if you make it this way…” Moreover he already got his master degree, and I think he knows better about it. However, though I could consult my annual and semester program to him basically I learnt it by myself. I tried to grasp the concept or the pattern of it by myself. (Interview3_K46) I usually asked… I have ever asked Mbak. Kiki. But mostly I asked the vice principal who was also the coordinator of the curriculum. Because he was also an English teacher, I thought it was better to ask him. (Interview2_J21) Besides annual and semester program, syllabus also became one of Kiki and Jalu‟s challenges in their initial times. Designing syllabus was their main problem related to the administrative works. They found that it was difficult to design syllabus because so far they thought that syllabus was already provided by

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the government or the school. Kiki revealed that she had never been taught how to design or develop syllabus when she was at the college. Next is about syllabus. We never studied about how to develop a syllabus. We used to think that syllabus is already provided. Since the school is a private bilingual school with national plus curriculum, we introduce English since the students are in the pre-school and we are free to not to follow the syllabus made by the government. Unfortunately, I did not ever study to develop a syllabus into certain extent. That was the thing that I never learnt before. (Interview3_K45) Hence, when she developed her syllabus, she made it based on the textbook used in the school without any changes and adjustment. Likewise, Jalu did not really understand how to develop a syllabus. Even though he had learnt from the last year syllabus, Jalu was still confused about to what extent he might develop it. Because of that, he did not make his own syllabus but copied from the last year syllabus. 6.

The participants’ first teaching Besides dealing with administrative works, teaching was Kiki and Jalu‟s

main job. In their first teaching, both of Kiki and Jalu experienced the unexpected thing. They faced the situation in which their teaching did not run as what they had planned. However, from the unexpected thing happened in their first teaching, they could took what so-called “the lesson learnt”. In her first teaching, Kiki taught about “How Do I Wear” at grade 2. Kiki taught the students about kinds of clothes and in what season we wear it. Her first teaching did not run as what she expected and then she considered her first teaching as unsuccessful.

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Kiki considered her first teaching as unsuccessful because the students were not enthusiastic in and did not enjoy the lesson. In her first teaching, Kiki found that the students did not enjoy the lesson and got bored with the material because they had already known that. At that day, I taught them about kinds of clothes. I thought the students had not studied about it before. Thus, I taught them about kinds of clothes at the first meeting. I showed them the pictures of the clothes and told them the name of those kinds of clothes. Surprisingly, they had already known that. According to the monthly schedule (mos) the students learnt about vocabulary at that day and since they had already known about it, I taught them fast. I only reviewed it. However, the students were bored then. They even said “I have already known that!” They did not really enjoy the lesson because they have already studied it before. It made me thought that they had already understood the material well. Thus I reviewed the material fast and then moved to the next teaching material, but still in the same topic. I taught them grammar related to the topic. (Interview3_K53) Another reason which made Kiki considered her first teaching as unsuccessful was the students‟ failure in doing quiz on that material. Kiki found that almost more than half of the class scored below the KKM for the monthly test. I was shocked with my students’ quiz results. Almost all of them got bad score. It was unexpected because at the time when I taught them that material, they had already known that. Most of the students got less than the KKM, some got 70, and only few got more than 70 but less than 80. Because of that, I made quizzes for several times. But the results still the same. Even when I gave them monthly test about that material, almost half of the class needed to take remedial test. (Interview3_K53) Knowing that her students‟ quizzes and test results were not satisfying, Kiki shared this problem to her colleagues and the class teachers. According to her colleagues and the class teachers, Kiki‟s teaching did not achieve the learning objectives so that the students could not achieve the learning outcomes too. They

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suggested Kiki to teach that material one more time. However, re-teaching that material was not possible. A tight teaching schedule made it impossible for Kiki to manage the time for re-teaching. Different from Kiki‟s colleagues and the class teachers, parents did not realize that there was something wrong. They only knew that their children did not perform well on the quiz and test because the only know their own child‟s score not the whole class. Though there was no complaint from the parents, Kiki did not let this problem unsolved. Then Kiki decided to review this material during the review time before mid-semester test. From that experience, Kiki learnt that she must make sure that the students understood the material well though they said that they had already known that. Kiki then realized that she must not be deceived with the students‟ words that they already understood the material. When the students said that they had already understood the lesson, their understanding was actually still superficial. Actually when the students said that they had already known the lesson, they did not really understand it. Now I know that when they say that they already understand the lesson, it does not always true. Therefore, I like to vary and modify my questions and exercises and then I ask it again and again to the students in order to make sure that they really understand the lesson. Their understanding is still superficial. They only know the name of the object but they cannot relate it to other things. For example, the students know that this kind of clothes is called jacket but they did not know in what season they could wear jacket. When almost half of the class scored less than KKM, I realized that it was my failure as a teacher. My teaching could not achieve the learning outcomes at all. It teaches me to always check my students‟ understanding again and again in order to make sure that they really understand the lesson. (Interview3_K53) Besides making sure that students understood the lesson well was important, Kiki also realized that she needed to have a rich collection of teaching

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idea to deliver the material interestingly. She mentioned that she needed a rich collection of teaching idea in order to overcome the situation in which students were getting bored since they have already known the material before. A rich collection of teaching idea would ease her to switch her planned teaching procedure into other procedure which still aimed to achieve the planned teaching objectives. Then, Kiki maintained that she should not be too rigid in teaching. It meant that she should be more flexible in teaching by allowing such a deviant teaching procedure from the lesson plan. At first, Kiki thought that her teaching should accordingly to the procedures which she had planned in her lesson plan. When her teaching achieved its objectives through her planned procedures, then she considered her teaching as successful. Thus, a good lesson plan was needed and must be adhered to achieve teaching objectives. In other words, Kiki used to think that sticking to a good lesson plan was the key success of teaching. However, in her initial teaching she found that the classroom situation did not always allow her to stick to her lesson plan. In her first teaching, Kiki found that time of teaching would affect the students‟ mood. Then the students‟ mood would usually influence the flow of teaching. When Kiki taught in the morning class, the students were still fresh, enthusiastic, and cooperative and thus she could apply her teaching procedures well. Contrastingly, when she taught in the afternoon class, she could not follow her planned procedure well since the students were reluctant to learn, not cooperative, and very noisy. Thus her

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teaching could not achieve its objectives and of course the students could not also obtain the learning outcomes. It made her realized that she had not ever learnt about how to face the unpredicted things happened in her class. She mentioned that she had not ever studied about how to overcome the unpredicted situation in which she could not run her teaching accordingly to her lesson plan. But then, Kiki learnt that when her teaching did not go well accordingly to her teaching procedures in the lesson plan, it was alright as long as her teaching could achieve its objectives. Thus she became more flexible towards her lesson plan now. She usually prepared for plan B when her lesson plan did not work well. Besides preparing plan B, she also differentiated the lesson plan for morning and afternoon class. … lesson plan which I made and applied at grade 2 Sparkling might different from the one that I made and applied at grade 2 Glowing, but the teaching objectives were the same. (Interview3_K60) Not much different from Kiki, Jalu who taught “A Day at the Zoo” for his first teaching also experienced the same situation with Kiki in which he could not apply his lesson plan well sometimes. He found it a bit difficult to teach grade 2 in the afternoon class. Since the students were already tired and sleepy in the afternoon, they tended to be not cooperative, reluctant to learn, and noisy. Indeed the teaching and learning process did not run well and thus the learning objectives could not be achieved. Similar with Kiki, facing that kind of problems in his first teaching had not ever been envisaged. It made Jalu needed to share it to other person in the school to look for enlightenment. Jalu shared his problem to the vice-principal. Jalu‟s

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sharing with the vice principal, who then revealed having the same experience with Jalu when he became a submissive teacher at grade 2, resulted an understanding that the ability of manage the class well could not instantly obtained and an overview that lesson plan was not everything. Jalu found that sticking to the teaching procedures in the lesson plan was not the important thing, but achieving the objectives of teaching. In his first teaching, Jalu also experienced facing the fact that some students scored badly on their quiz. Different from Kiki‟s case where her teaching was the matter, the problem in Jalu‟s case was his quiz. Some parents whose children got bad score complained to Jalu for his pictures in the quiz were not clear. Those parents blamed it as the impediment for their children to do the quiz. Those parents believed that their children could actually do the quiz well if the pictures were clear since their children always get good score in English. Then, what Jalu could do at that time was only explaining to the parents that since he was new and just replaced the previous teacher, he made the quiz based on the previous teacher‟s pattern in making quizzes. Moreover, he also told the parents that he had already consult it to the vice-principal in order to dampen their anger. Receiving complaints from parents made Jalu re-examined his quiz. He realized that the pictures were not clear. This experience taught Jalu to be careful in making quiz next time. He did not make similar type of quiz with the previous teacher any longer. From this experience, Jalu knew how to make quiz which was suitable with his students and he also found his own type in making quiz. He did not any longer following the way the previous teacher develop a quiz. In

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developing quiz or test, Jalu now was aware to consider his students‟ ability. Therefore, he made quiz which was feasible for all of the students but challenging. Before I make the quiz, I have to make sure what is going to be assessed. I check the basic competence, the standard competence, and the indicators first before making the quiz. Then, based on the basic competence, the standard competence, and the indicators, I developed quiz which is feasible for the students whose ability is the least, but challenging at some points for the students whose ability is the most. (Interview3_J21) 7.

Meeting with ‘special’ kids Special kids in the participants‟ stories were those who were the trouble

makers and who had different learning ability in learning English than other students in the class. Their initial in-service teaching opened Kiki and Jalu‟s mind that a real language classroom consists of various children with their own uniqueness. In the real language classroom, they faced children with their real characteristics which far different from the embellishment of the children image. They found that children were not always nice, kind, cheerful, and friendly because they sometimes might turn to be very difficult to be controlled. The most difficult situation experienced by Jalu and Kiki in their initial years of teaching was meeting with the “trouble makers”. Both of them got terribly stressed when the class was in chaos. Kiki had ever experienced her class turned to be like a jungle as her students shouted and wandered here and there. The unforgettable part of teaching in the jungle was when one of her students embraced her legs and then he licked them. That boy was pretended to be a dog. Kiki was then in difficulties to released herself from that boy. Though, she already mustered up her energy to ask that boy

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to get her free, to go back to his place, and to continue to study, it was useless. Likewise, asking the students to be quiet was not easy since they would stop making noise only for a while. The same classroom situation was also experienced by Jalu. He described his class as in chaos. One of his students had ever hid the LCD remote control in his uniform pocket. It was very difficult for Jalu to persuade that boy to return that remote control. When Jalu tried to ask that boy to return the remote control, the rest of the class then became very noisy. Other terrible experience with that boy was when suddenly he climbed up Jalu‟s back when Jalu was taking something on the floor. The trouble maker in Kiki and Jalu‟s class often became the impetus of the class noisiness. When the class was very noisy and hard to be controlled, indeed the teaching and learning process did not run smoothly. Sometimes, the teaching objectives could not be achieved too. This kind of situation made Kiki and Jalu felt stressed. They did not know how to cope with this problem. Knowing Kiki and Jalu‟s difficulties in classroom management, the school principal and his vice supported Kiki and Jalu by supervising the class when they were teaching and encouraging them to survive though it was difficult. Kiki told me that Because my class was always very noisy and hard to be controlled, the school principal stayed in the class when I was teaching. When the school principal was with us in the class, the students were not very noisy because they were afraid of him. The school principal stayed in my class when I was teaching because I could not control the class and I was too delicate to students at that time. (Interview3_K26)

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Actually Kiki realized that being accompanied by the school principal when she was teaching in the class was not the effective way to solve her problem. Thus it made her stressed in finding the remedy for it. Different from Kiki who was being supervised by the school principal, Jalu‟s got suggestion from the vice principal to read a book entitled “Nanny 911” to learn how to handle children. However, he had not found the suitable strategy or technique from “Nanny 911” which matched with his situation and himself. Besides suggestion from the vice principal, Jalu also got encouragements from the school principals who often visited him in his office during his free time to ask about his feeling and how things went so far. Besides receiving support from the school principal and his vice, Kiki and Jalu were also seeking for others‟ suggestions by sharing their problems to other teachers. However, sharing their problems to other teachers did not help them to find the solution to remedy their problem with the chaos in the classroom because they still needed to find their own strategies to handle their class. Kiki revealed that each teacher had their own style and she could not just adopt one of them to solve her problem. She needed to find her own style which suitable with her students and her characteristics.

When I told my problem to other teachers, they only told me their methodologies. One said, “My method is like this…” Another said, “Mine is like this…” The next teacher also said, “Mine is like this…” Each teacher has their own style in handling the class. For example, a teacher whose characteristic is grumpy tends to be very strict to the students. However, I could not suddenly change my style becomes very strict like that teacher. I could not adopt that style and applied it in my class because the students will be reluctant to me. It made me confused in choosing the right ways to handle my students. I had ever tried so many styles in order

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to find the one which worked best and was suitable with my characteristic (Interview3_K32) Likewise, Jalu also experienced the same thing with Kiki. He revealed that I had ever asked my colleagues who stayed in the same office with me and who were mostly female about how to handle noisy class. Then they told me their ways in handling that kind of situation, “To face that kind of situation the strategies are this ... this … and this …”. Another teacher even shared her similar experience with me and how she handled it, “Sir, I also have the same experience with you in my initial year of teaching”. Then she shared her experience and her knowledge in handling noisy class. … some strategies could be adopted, some are modified, and some need further consideration. I need to consider those strategies with my characteristics, whether it is suitable or not. I need to adjust it with myself. For example, I am a delicate person and I definitely cannot be grumpy to children. Therefore I cannot adopt the strategy from teacher whose characteristic is grumpy and who are able to bring themselves to be grumpy to children. Because of that I need to think about my own strategies to handle my class. (Interview2_J43-J44) Besides meeting with the trouble makers, these novice teachers also met with students who had different ability in learning English than other students. Both Kiki and Jalu identified students who did not perform as well as other students in each of their class. Those students were having lower ability than others. Moreover, those students had difficulties in paying attention and concentration. Kiki experienced meeting two students who was then revealed having lower ability than others. The first student was having difficulties in understanding commands, instructions, and sentences in English. Therefore, this student could not give respond to the teacher correctly in English. When this student was being asked about something in English, she could not respond it. This student would usually answer the question by uttering “Hee…”, “Mmm …”,

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or “What?”. Apart from her weakness in understanding commands, instructions, and sentences, this little girl could mention vocabulary well but still her spelling still incorrect sometimes. For her achievement in doing English task or exercise, this student could score more than KKM but could not get high score. However, Kiki found it absurd because this student could not get the same score in doing the same exercise with the same questions which being reordered its sequence. Furthermore this student also liked to lose her concentration, to play by herself in the middle of the lesson, and suddenly laughed without any reasons. Another Kiki‟s student who then was revealed having problem in learning was a boy who performed slower than others. At first, Kiki did not realize that this boy was „special‟ until his parent came and told Kiki that his note was not complete and messy. Then Kiki noticed that this boy was slow in writing and processing information in his mind, and in recalling the lesson. For example, copying Kiki‟s note from the white board to his own note book, he needed longer time than his friends. In doing exercises he could only understand and do 5 numbers while the others do 10 numbers. Jalu also experienced meeting a student who has different ability than other students. He found a student whose English proficiency was not at the same level with other students. This student was the one who hid the LCD remote control. Besides having lower ability than others, this boy was also very lazy and liked to work hastily. Because of that he often got bad scored and needed to take remedial.

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Meeting with students, who had different ability than others, provoked Kiki and Jalu to find a way to help those students to perform better. In finding ways for her „special‟ students, Kiki tried to find the ways by herself, to communicate with the parents, and to ask suggestions from colleagues and school principal. Different from Kiki, Jalu did not ask suggestion from his colleagues and did not communicate the problem to the parent, but found his own way to deal with his „special‟ student. Previously, Kiki thought that her „special‟ student, who had difficulties in understanding and responding to commands, instructions, and sentences in English, needed extra explanation than other students. But then, when she shared this problem to other teachers, it was revealed than other teachers also had the same problem with that girl. Even for other subjects delivered in Indonesian such as Bahasa Indonesia and PKN, this „special‟ student also could not understand the lesson well. Since other teachers also experienced the same problem like her, Kiki had an initiative to communicate this problem with the parents. However, the parents particularly the „special‟ student‟s mom insisted that her daughter did not have any problem in learning. The mother said that when she taught her daughter at home, she could understand and do the exercise well. This made Kiki suspected the „special‟ students‟ mom was having different style in teaching. Kiki suspected the mother was teaching her daughter in Bahasa Indonesia not in English. Besides that, Kiki also suspected this student‟s age which was younger than her friends as one of the cause. Kiki guessed that this student‟s was not in the same intellectual

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and psychological development stages with other students so that she could not perform like them. Since this problem with Kiki‟s „special‟ students was not only Kiki‟s own problem but the entire teachers, the school principal got involve in finding ways to help this student. The school principal assigned the teachers to give tutorial to this student for subjects in which she scored less than KKM. Since this „special‟ student‟s English score was not below the KKM, Kiki did not have to give her tutorial. Though Kiki did not need to give this „special‟ student tutorial, she still needed to find a way to help this student to perform better in her class. Because this girl was difficult to concentrate and to focus on the lesson, Kiki paid more attention to her. Kiki always monitored her, reminded her to listen, and hooked her up to the lesson. Kiki changed her way to remind this student to pay attention and to listen to the lesson became more firmly than before. In hooking this student up to the lesson, Kiki liked to ask questions related to the lesson again and again. Furthermore, Kiki liked to put this girl with brighter students in the class when doing group task. Though sometimes the brighter students did not want to be in the same group with this „special‟ girl, Kiki forced them to do so. By putting this „special‟ student in the same group with brighter students, Kiki hoped it would help her to learn from the brighter students. In handling Kiki‟s student who was slow in writing and processing information in his mind, and in recalling the lesson, she found her own way. To increase this student speed in writing, Kiki liked to encourage this boy to write

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fast. Then, Kiki usually gave him less portion in copying examples than his friends. In doing task or exercise, Kiki also gave him less portion than his friends. Kiki let him doing half of the total numbers. She decided to do it because Kiki thought that it was better for him to do half of the total numbers and understood it rather than do all of the numbers but did not understand at all. Similar with Kiki, in handling his „special‟ student who has lower ability than others, was lazy, and liked to work hastily, Jalu also found his own way. Because Jalu knew that this boy liked to do the test hastily and scored bad, Jalu gave the remedial test orally. In other words, Jalu switched his way by testing the students orally. When this boy was tested orally, he could achieve full point. Even though he already found his way to deal with this problem, Jalu still communicated this boy‟s problem with the class teacher so that the class teacher could inform it to the parents. Since this boy was very lazy, he even slept during the lesson time. This kind of behavior needed to be reported to the parents to the class teacher. Hopefully by having communication with the class teacher and parents, this student could be helped to be more diligent in the class and careful in doing tasks. 8.

Reminding and encouraging students to speak English Since the school where Kiki and Jalu worked wass a bilingual school, the

students were required to speak in English. The students should not speak in Indonesian, especially when they were studying English. However, younger students were not easy to be required to speak English all the time because their

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linguistic ability was also still limited, they mostly spoke in Indonesian at home, and their motivation to always speak in English was still low. At their initial years of teaching, Kiki and Jalu were still a bit loose with the use of L1 in the class. They sometimes let the students to speak in Indonesian. Then they gradually reminded their students to speak in English when thy uttered something in Indonesian. Moreover, when the students talked or asked in Indonesian, Kiki and Jalu always responded it in English. After teaching for a year, Kiki then changed her ways of reminding and encouraging the students to speak English. Right at the beginning of the new school year Kiki stated her rule of classroom language and its consequences if the students broke it. The students must speak in English during the English lesson time. When they did not know the English word, the students might say it in Indonesian but it should be accompanied with quotation mark gesture. If the spoke more than one Indonesian words, they would get the consequence. For the first time breaking the rule, the student must sing banana milkshake song with its movements in front of the class. For the second time breaking it, they must do it in the vice-principal office. For the third, they must do it in the school principal office. According to Kiki, this rule was quite successfully working because the students were shy if they had to do it and thus they tried to always speak in English. Different from Kiki, Jalu, who was still in his around 5 months of teaching, could not suddenly implement a strict rule for classroom language. He was afraid if he suddenly implement a strict classroom language rule, his students

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would complain and even reluctant to speak. Thus, what Jalu could do was only always reminding the students to speak in English and responding all of the students Indonesian questions in English. However, he planned to implement such a classroom language rule in the next school year and he still tried to find his rule for classroom language for the next school year. 9.

Participants’ job besides teaching Kiki and Jalu‟s main job as English teachers was teaching English.

However, they still had so many jobs besides teaching such as administrative works and PIC of certain program. Besides annual program, semester program, and syllabus which should be done first or before teaching, they still had so many administrative works such as lesson plan monthly schedule (mos); summary of teaching material; grading; score test analysis; report card checklist; quiz and test scope and items (kisi-kisi soal); and making questions for quiz, monthly test, and final test. Apart from their duty as English teacher and its administrative works, they also had another jobs related to their additional position in the school. Besides an English teacher, Jalu was a Christian Education teacher and the PIC for swimming program in the school. As the PIC for swimming, Jalu was responsible to gather the students who joined swimming extra-curricular after school and to accompany those students waiting for the car which would pick them up to the swimming pool. On the other hand, Kiki was a classroom teacher in this year and the coordinator of English development started from the middle of her first year up to now. As the English development coordinator, she was responsible for arranging

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the time table for English subject. Then she also became English trainer for other teachers. A year before, Kiki had ever been an assistant of classroom teacher in her first year of working. Kiki and Jalu worked every Monday to Friday starts from 7 o‟clock, in the morning until 3.15 in the afternoon. At 07.00 a.m. until 07.30 a.m. Kiki and Jalu were having morning service and briefing. If they were on usher duty, they had to stay at the front gate to greet the students from 07.30 a.m. until 08.00 a.m. If not, they were free up to 08.30. However, Kiki who was an assistant of class teacher in her first year working and was a class teacher in her following year of working, could not have free time from 08.00 a.m. until 08.30 a.m. because she must lead the morning service for the students in the class. After that, Kiki and Jalu would enter the class based on the teaching schedule they have. In one day, Kiki and Jalu usually had around 5 up to 6 hours of teaching. An hour of teaching was equal with 35 minutes. In between their busy teaching hours, they had around 3 hours of teaching which was free and could be used for doing their administrative works. In other words, they only had approximately 1 hour and 45 minutes for doing any job other than teaching, such as making lesson plan, monthly schedule (mos), summary of teaching material, grading, score test analysis, report card checklist, quiz and test scope and items (kisi-kisi soal), and making questions for quiz, monthly test, and final test. At first, their free time in between their teaching hours was not enough to be used for doing all of the administrative works. Thus they could not avoid

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bringing their works home. Their free time at home was usually being used to do administrative works. Kiki revealed that she could not finish all of the administrative works only in her free time from teaching. Though she tried to manage her free time well for doing any kinds of administrative works, the time was still not enough. Thus she still needed to bring her works home. She especially did lesson planning at home because she could not easily find the idea for it at the office. Moreover, her duty in preparing the school event also took her time and thus she could not finish the administrative works at the office. Kiki told me: In my free time, around 3 hours of teaching, I tried to finish any administrative work. It can be lesson plan, questions for quiz, checking students‟ exercises, quizzes, or tests. However, the time is not enough. Therefore, I need to bring some to home. It is impossible for me to make lesson plan during my free time which is not quite long. Moreover, when we are going to hold such an event, such as Christmas and Valentine, the free time would also be reduced for discussing the upcoming event and thus overtime-work at home is unavoidable. (Interview3_K64) As the time went by, Kiki realized that she needed to have a good time management so that she did not need to bring so many works home. Thus, she avoided making lesson plan at the office because she needed more time to think and to find the idea for it. Instead of spending her free time to think and to find the idea for her lesson plan, she did other administrative works which could be finished faster than making lesson plan. However, Kiki maintained that up to now she still brought her work home sometimes when she could not finish it at the office.

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Talking about her overtime-works at home, it was then revealed that actually her over-time works are not mainly about doing administrative works, but also thinking over her students‟ particular problems, for instance the trouble maker students and the low ability students. Kiki revealed that … actually my overtime-work at home is a lot and is not mainly about administrative job. As a teacher, I realized that I am working with humans. My job is about my relationship with my students who are humans. If I work with a computer, I could know exactly the cause of its error. However, working with human is not as definite as working with a computer. When there is a problem with children, I need to think about what makes them become like that… I need to think about how to communicate it with their parents and also how to make up their behavior to be better … (Interview3_K8) Jalu also experienced similar things. At his first month working he even brought the entire administrative works home because he used to think and to do intellectual things better at home. Another reason was because he did not have notebook computer, but only personal computer at home. But then he realized that doing all of the administrative works at home was not effective. Sometimes he even left important data at home. Then he decided to buy notebook computer to ease his jobs because he could do his administrative jobs at the office. However he sometimes still brings his works home because the time is not enough. Facing with piles of works besides teaching made Jalu realized that he must be good in managing his time. He sometimes has additional duty, such as preparing certain school event, besides doing administrative works. Thus, he was now more flexible but wise to choose which works done at the office and which works done at home based on the urgency. For instance, he ever experienced

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using his free time in which he usually did administrative works for preparing the following day‟s school event. 10. The participants’ metamorphose Kiki and Jalu‟s experiences about the reality in language classroom which different from what they envisaged before in their pre-service education shaped them to be who they were in doing their jobs as English teachers then. Through their experiences they found the best way to deal with their students. The remarkable change was in the way they teach the students from fun, nice, and loose into fun but strict. At the beginning they were unable to handle their classrooms which were always noisy and chaotic. They realized that their inability to handle their classroom was because they were too kind, too delicate, and too loose so that the students could see the cleft in which they could be noisy and could play during the lesson time. Kiki was already stricter than before. Her class was already under controlled. The school principal did not need to stay in her class any longer to make the students quiet. She already had her own rules for the students during her teaching. Right at the beginning of the new school year, she already stated her rules and its consequences if the students broke it. Then, she was also consistent and sticks to the rules always. As the results every time she entered the class the students were ready to study and were consistent to speak English during the lesson time. Moreover, the students were now aware of Kiki‟s authority as the teacher. Conversely, Kiki now was firmer than before to the students and being obeyed by the students. Though

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Kiki was firmer than before, she still taught them in nice and fun ways so that the students were not afraid of her. She ever faced a student who was angry because he lost the game or his score was left by other students and he would lose the game. Then that boy suddenly said “I don‟t join!” At that time Kiki did not know how to handle him. Kiki was afraid if she would discourage him or made him angry and sad when she became firm to him. But now, when he says “I don‟t join!” she would let him not join the game even she will let him not join the class. She was not afraid of that boy‟s threat any longer. Now Kiki was firmer and stricter than before. She wants her students aware of her authority in the class, that she was the controller not the students. Kiki‟s change from nice, delicate, fun, and loose into nice, delicate, fun but firm teacher was not only formed by her teaching experiences but also from the training she ever joined. Start from last year, she joined GLDPN (Global Literacy Professional Development Network) training from the International Reading Association. This training was a training held for teachers in Salatiga. Every school in Salatiga was invited to join this training. However, the quota was only 20 teachers from the total teachers in Salatiga. Kiki‟s school was only got 4 slots to join that training and thus the school needed to choose the teachers to be sent for that training. And Kiki was one of the teachers chosen by the school to join that training. From GLDPN training, Kiki learnt a lot of teaching techniques and methodologies and one of them was classroom management. Kiki revealed that

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fron the training she learnt about how to make the students close to her and not afraid of her but still obey her. Moreover, she knew that a contract between her and the students was needed to make and to agree on from the first day of school. By making a contract the students would know what the rules and the consequences are. Furthermore, the GLDPN training also opened Kiki‟s minds that her view about the students as the main cause of classroom chaos was wrong. Now, Kiki understand that when a classroom was in chaos, the problem was not on the students who were naughty but on the teacher who was not able to control or to manage the class well. Hence it made her now became firm to the students. Next, she now realized that classroom management was essential in her teaching, particularly at the primary level. It was essential because good classroom management would smooth the run of teaching and learning process in which the objectives of teaching were obtained well. Then, this shifted her belief that a good lesson plan was the key success of teaching. Different from Kiki, though Jalu now also realized that firmness was needed in teaching besides fun and nice, in order to control his chaotic class, he could only verbally warn the students to be quiet and to stop playing so far. Sometimes he applied his own way to make the class quiet, such as silent competition (lomba diam). Silent competition was Jalu‟s way to ask the students to be quiet and the quietest will get such a reward. When the class is getting noisy and at that time I bring the students‟ test results, I tell them “Okay, I have your test results. Do you want it?” The students reply “Yes, Mr…” and the class becomes very noisy. Then I ask

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them to be quiet and the quietest student would get the test result first. It works at grade 2. (Interview2_J38) However when he applies lomba diam, it could only make the students be quiet for a while. Jalu guessed that the students could only be quiet for a while because their attention or concentration span was still short. Since that way only calm the students for a while, Jalu had to do something else to hook their attention up. To do that, Jalu usually created a game or ice breaker which was interesting and still related to the lesson to get the students attention back. Thus Jalu needed to prepare a lot of idea about games and icebreakers to grab the students‟ attention back. It was needed because Jalu ever experienced a situation in which one of his students ever said that his game was boring. In his fifth month of teaching, Jalu realized that his classroom management had not established well yet. He maintained that from the scale of 1-10, his classroom management was only 4 up to now. He desired to improve his classroom management and to find his own ways which were suitable with himself and did not require him to speak loudly because he could not speak loudly. Moreover, he also planned to be firmer in the new school year. He planned to state his rules and its consequences right at the beginning of the new school year, so that he would not be overwhelmed with the students‟ noisiness and classroom chaos. Another change because of their experiences so far was changing in the way they presented the lesson. Because children liked to easily get bored they

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needed to be creative and innovative in presenting the material. Previously, Kiki liked to print pictures as her ava for teaching. But then she found it ineffective and uneconomical. Because of that she made use the LCD projector as her teaching aid in showing picture, flash cards, etc. Similar with Kiki, Jalu also made use LCD more in presenting the material in order to make the students eager to learn. Jalu usually developed such computer games, such as hang man and showed it through the LCD projector. 11. Participants’ reason to stay teaching In their first and second month of working which was shocking, hard, torturing, and stressful had ever raised the feeling to leave the job as primary English teacher in that school. Their belief towards themselves, that they could pass the difficult times and found the joys of their works, was one of the reasons which made them survived. Kiki and Jalu believed that they could undergo their job well and of course to pass the difficulties and challenges. They wanted to prove to themselves and others that they could. Next, supportive colleagues also became the reason why they stayed teaching there up to now. Related to this reason Kiki revealed The working environment is pleasant because the age range between me and my colleagues is not too far, except the school principal. Moreover, there are a lot of teachers who come from the same alma mater so that we are relatively close to each other. Our closeness makes us easy to support each other and to joke. (Interview3_K73)

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Likewise, Jalu said … other teachers are nice and fun. I feel like I am reared by them since I am the youngest among them. I feel like I have many older brothers and sisters. (Interview2_J79) Beside their perceived their efficacy and supportive colleagues, family supports enabled them to survive with their job as a primary English teacher up to now. Family was the first place to share their difficulties, feelings, and complaints. Family was the endless support and encouragement provider for them to survive. Their students‟ affection also made Kiki and Jalu refused to leave this job. Recently they realized that their students love them. Kiki was shocked but happy when she got welcoming card and letter from her students after one week leave because she got injured from a traffic accident. Similarly, Jalu also got surprised knowing his students missed him and looked for him when he was replaced by other students because he had to do another duty which could not be left. In addition, Jalu had a different reason from Kiki which made him stayed teaching up to now. It was his gratefulness to God that He granted Jalu‟s prayer to have a job in Salatiga. Jalu revealed that if he leaves this job it meant that he was not grateful to God for his granted prayer. 12. Wish (epilogue) After so many things happened, experienced, and learnt by Jalu and Kiki in their initial year of teaching, these novice teachers had wishes which they thought necessary for their professional development. First they wished for training which beneficial to help them to improve their performance as primary

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English teachers. Specifically, Jalu wished for a training about classroom management. He said I think classroom management training is needed. I think I am not the only teacher who needs that kind of training because some of my friends are also young teacher and have the same difficulties in classroom management like me. Thus we need it so much. Moreover, when there is training on classroom management, we will have the same understanding of it. Therefore, we will have the same standard of it. The same standard of classroom management will make the students easily to adapt themselves to obey the rules. (Interview3_J33) One wish further from Jalu, Kiki wished for the school to send and to grant its prominent teacher to higher level education program. By obtaining higher education, Kiki thought it will helpful for teacher to perform better in teaching.

B. INTERPRETATION In this section, participants‟ stories were being interpreted based on the pre-figured themes and emergent themes. There were eight pre-figured themes established in the framework pre-understanding: (1) initial belief, (2) reality shock, (3) feeling, (4) problem, (5) support, (6) struggle and adaptation, (7) current belief. Besides based pre-figured themes, participants‟ stories would also be interpreted based on the emergent themes. The emergent themes were: (1) good time management, (2) autonomy, (3) understanding children, (4) creativity, and (5) needs. 1.

Initial belief Initial belief in this study was defined as novice teachers‟ belief which has

been formed during their pre-service education which was still perceived during

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their first time of teaching in real classroom language and then changed because of certain events or experiences. It was related to what Farrel (2012) mentioned as the ideals that novice teachers formed during their pre-service education. In their initial teaching, Kiki and Jalu believed that teaching English to young learners should be fun. Kiki revealed that she used to believe that teaching English to young learners should be in fun way and thus she had to be nice and as cheerful as children when she taught them. Kiki often stated Teaching young learners should be nice and fun so that the students are keen to learn. For example, we start the lesson by greeting the “Good morning …” (she said it cheerfully) (Interview3_K26) Similarly Jalu also stated that ideally teaching English to young learners should be in fun, amusing, and pleasant ways. Ideally, teaching children should be fun, amusing, and pleasant. (Interview2_J53) Because Kiki and Jalu believed that teaching English to young learners should be fun, they tried to not to be firm to students who suddenly lost their motivation to study, who suddenly refused to join the activity, or who make chaos in the class. Rather than warned the students firmly, Kiki and Jalu tended to encourage them in delicate manner because they believed that teaching should be fun, pleasant, and should not make the students discourage to learn. Moreover, their belief that teaching English to young learners should be fun is also depicted in the way they presented their teaching materials. They liked to teach through colorful pictures and games. They also liked to make use of LCD projector to show flash cards, motion pictures, or videos related to the lesson.

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I like to teach my students by showing them colorful pictures which I printed on paper. Those pictures are my teaching aids. It is effective enough because the pictures are interesting and it can make students eager to learn. Then I use LCD projector to show pictures and videos because it is more economical. (Interview3_K78) At that time I was teaching about things we wear on hot and cold day. I showed them a picture of sun hat and blank space to be fulfilled with alphabets by using LCD projector. It is like hang-man game. Then the students should guess what it is and fill the blanks. (Interview2_J60) Another initial belief conceived by these novice teachers in their beginning career as English teachers was good lesson plan as the key of successful teaching. It was conveyed when they told their unsuccessful teaching because of their inability to follow their planned teaching procedures and to achieve teaching objectives as they designed on their lesson planned. Because they believed that a good lesson plan was the key successful of teaching, they tried to adhere to their teaching procedures and to achieve the teaching objectives through the planned procedures so that they did not allow for any deviance from their lesson plan. From the excerpt of the interviews transcripts below, it could be seen that they tended to stick to their planned teaching procedures in their lesson plan. I thought when I already had good lesson plan my teaching would be successful. When I have good lesson plan it meant that I am save. I just need to follow my planned teaching procedures and my teaching objectives will be achived then. But then when I experienced the situation in which my procedures could not be applied, I feel confused and I think my teaching was not successful. It could not achive its objectives. I did not know what best to do at that time. (Interview3_K59) In my first month of teaching I always tried to teach accordingly to my lesson plan. (Interview2_J45)

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The next initial belief was the students were the causal agent of classroom noisiness and chaos. Therefore they viewed naughty children as the main cause of classroom noisiness and chaos. Previously, Kiki thought that the classroom chaos and noisiness was caused by the students who were naughty and who did not want to listen to her. I used to think that children are the causal agent of classroom nosiness and chaos. When my class became very noisy and chaotic it must be caused by the students who were naughty, were talkative, and did not want to listen to me. (Interview3_K39) Different from Kiki, Jalu did not reveal this initial belief clearly. However it was conveyed from the way he dealt with noisiness and chaos in his classroom. When the class was getting noisy and chaotic, Jalu tended to have “man to man” way to solve it. It can be seen from the way he dealt with a boy who hid the LCD remote control. He preferred to approach and to calm down the boy who was considered as the impetus of the classroom noisiness and chaos. 2.

Reality shock Usually, beginning teachers faced reality shock when they entered their in-

service teaching (Veenman, 1984, Huberman, 1993, Farrel, 2006, Farrel, 2008, and Farrel 2012). Reality shock meant facing the reality which was far different from what novice teachers envisaged during their pre-service education (Huberman, 1993). Moreover, when novice teachers faced reality shock, Farrel (2008) mentioned that they would realized that there was a gap between academic course content in their language teaching preparation programs and the reality that they face in the real language classroom.

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Kiki and Jalu experienced reality shock when they faced the real language classroom situation, the real working situation, and the real responsibilities of a teacher which were different from what they had formed and envisaged during their pre-service education program. Because of that they also realized that there was a gap between what they have learnt in their pre-service education program and the reality that they face in the real language classroom. The first reality shock experienced by Kiki and Jalu was the fact that teacher‟s job besides teaching was not few. There were so many administrative works which they did not know how to deal with before. Previously, they only knew that besides teaching, a teacher still had to deal with administrative works such as lesson plan, making questions for quizzes or test, grading, and filling student‟s report cards. Other administrative works such as annual program, semester program, syllabus, monthly schedule (mos), summary of teaching material, score test analysis, report card checklist, and quiz and test scope and items (kisi-kisi soal) were never been imagined before. They experienced reality shocked when they know that teachers have piles of works besides teaching. Moreover, most of those piles of administrative works were new for them because they never learnt it before. Thus they needed to learn how to make it. When they learnt how to deal with administrative works, they realized that there was a gap between what they have learnt in their pre-service education program and the reality that they face in their working environment. Particularly, Kiki and Jalu found it difficult for them to develop and to design a syllabus

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because they used to think that the syllabus was already prepared by the government or the school. It was conveyed through Kiki‟s sharing that … teachers are having freedom in designing and developing the syllabus. The thing is I did not learn how to design the syllabus and did not know to what extend it could be developed. (Interview3_K45) Similarly, Jalu revealed that I am still confused in how to design syllabus up to now, … hehehe still confused … Last time, I copied the previous year syllabus, I only changed the year… (Interview2_J18) The next reality shock faced by Kiki and Jalu was the fact that the real language classroom, especially at the primary level was not as pleasant as they have ever imagined. They used to thought that working with children was always fun. However, they realized that children were not always as nice as they had ever thought before. Dealing with children was not easy because they were moody and unpredictable. It made them realized that they did not have enough classroom management knowledge and skills. They realized that they did not learn much about the important skill needed to handle classroom, which was classroom management, during their pre-service education program. Thus they learnt it naturally from the environment and they seek for support related to this matter. Kiki revealed that One of the important things that I did not learn in the college was about classroom management. I was only taught about how to plan and evaluate. I was not taught about how to handle moody and unpredictable students. Thus, I learn classroom management naturally from the environment. (Interview1_K12)

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Likewise, Jalu shared that he did not learn about classroom management in the college and then he said that My weakness is on classroom management. I could not handle my class well. From the scale of 1-10, I‟ll say that my classroom management now is only 4. (Interview2_J49) 3.

Feeling In their initial years of teaching, novice teachers experienced the reality

which was different from what they have envisaged during their pre-service education (Farrel, 2008). Intial year of teaching was not always easy. HulingAustin et al. (1989) described this period as a “sink-or-swim experience”. When novice teachers “sank”, they would abandon their jobs. Novice teachers abandoned their job because they felt overwhelmed, ineffective, and unsupported (Ingersoll and Smith, 2003). However, when they found the joy of teaching, they would survive (Farrel, 2012). In other words, novice English teachers experienced the up and down feelings during their initial years of teaching. From Kiki and Jalu‟s lived experience as novice English teachers, their feelings during their initial years of teaching were elucidated. Based on oxford online dictionary, feeling was an emotional state or reaction. From their first time working up to now, both of Kiki and Jalu experienced the up and down of emotional state towards the reality in the school environment. They ever felt stressed, confused, useless, but then they felt happy, loved, and proud. Stress according to oxford online dictionary was a state of mental or emotional strain or tension resulting from adverse or demanding circumstances. Thus when someone felt stressed, it meant that he or she felt a mental or

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emotional strain or tension resulting from adverse or demanding circumstances. Kiki and Jalu also ever felt stressed in their initial months of working because of the demand of their jobs, particularly their piles of administrative jobs. They got emotional tensions too when they faced noisy and chaotic classroom in which they could not teach well. They revealed that At the beginning, I felt stressed since the students were very active and difficult to be handled. (Interview1_K21) Knowing that I have so many administrative works which I had never thought before made me felt stressed. I guess other schools do not require their teachers to do these kinds of administrative jobs. (Interview3_J31) In the oxford online dictionary, confused meant unable to think clearly and bewildered. When an individual could not think clearly about what to do or how to do, it meant that he or she feel confused. Feeling confused was also experienced by these novice primary English teachers. Dealing with administrative works, especially the syllabus was something new which they never had learnt before in their pre-service education program made them felt confused. They felt confused to make the syllabus correctly. Related to this, Kiki and Jalu ever mentioned that I am still confused in how to design syllabus up to now… hehehe still confused … (Interview2_J18) I did not learn how to design the syllabus and did not know to what extend it could be developed. (Interview3_K45) Useless in the oxford online dictionary was defined as not fulfilling or not expected to achieve the intended purpose or desired outcome. Both of Kiki and

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Jalu felt useless when they could not achieve the desired outcome of being a teacher. Kiki felt useless when she, as the teacher, could not control the class situation and needed to be supervised by the school principal. Because my class was always very noisy and hard to be controlled, the school principal stayed in the class when I was teaching.When the school principal was with us in the class, the students were not very noisy because they were afraid of him. The school principal stayed in my class when I was teaching because I could not control the class. (Interview3_K26) Feeling useless was also experienced by Jalu when he did not understand how to design a syllabus and thus he copied exactly from the previous year syllabus made by other teacher. Jalu shared that Though it was ridiculous and made me felt useless, I re-typed the previous syllabus. (Interview2_J19) The meaning of happy in the oxford online dictionary was feeling or showing pleasure or contentment. Besides feeling stressed, confused, and useless, Kiki and Jalu also experienced happiness in their initial times. Kiki and Jalu felt happy because they were working with fun, and pleasant colleagues. Fun, and pleasant colleagues who liked to tell jokes and to share teaching experience make Kiki and Jalu felt happy to work in that school. Supportive school principal and his vice also made Kiki and Jalu happy and then enjoyed and felt comfortable to work. Love was defined as a strong feeling of affection by the oxford online dictionary. When a person felt loved, it meant that he or she felt that people loved and cared of him or her. Both of Kiki and Jalu felt loved by their students. Kiki and Jalu already had close relationship with their students and their students loved

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them. Jalu‟s students looked for him, when he was replaced by other teacher because of Jalu had something important to do. It showed that his students missed Jalu. Likewise, Kiki also felt loved by her students when receiving a welcoming party and letter from them after one week leave because she was sick. Based on oxford online dictionary, proud was feeling deep pleasure or satisfaction as a result of the one‟s own achievements, qualities, or possessions. Kiki and Jalu felt proud of their job now. Kiki felt proud that she could be teacher whose job was not merely delivering the materials to the students. She felt proud because she could be a teacher who did not only teach but also did a lot of administrative works. She also felt proud for her teaching which was not conventional and for her successful in applying classroom management in this new school year. Feeling proud of being a teacher was also experienced by Jalu. Jalu felt proud that he was a novice teacher who could survive in a prospective school though was still relatively new. 4.

Problem Pfitser (2006) put that during their initial years of teaching, novice teachers

faced many problems and challenges. As novice teachers, in their initial times of teaching, Kiki and Jalu also faced problems. Veenman (1984), Clift et al. (1995), Alexander and Galbraith (1997), Crookes and Arakaki (1999) and McCann and Johannessen (2004) found that classroom management and working load were the two most outstanding problems faced by novice teachers in their initial years of teaching. Likewise, Kiki and Jalu experienced those two outstanding problems in their initial years of teaching.

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Based on their lived experience, prominent problems which they faced during their initial times of teaching were classroom management and working load. In their first time teaching they found it difficult to handle noisy and chaotic classroom. Moreover, facing with so many administrative works with insufficient time was also one of their problems. The first prominent problem faced by these novice teachers was classroom management. In their initial years they always faced with the condition in which their teachings did not run smoothly because the class turned to be like a jungle. Both of Kiki and Jalu did not know what they should do to handle that kind of classroom situation and they found difficulties in it. Moreover, because they were lack of classroom management skill, they did not make the students to consistently speak English. They did not have firm and clear rules for classroom language yet. The second prominent problem in their initial times of teaching was working load. Besides teaching, Kiki and Jalu were responsible with many administrative works. They found it difficult to finish all of those administrative works at the office because sometimes they were also busy with the school upcoming event preparation. Thus, they often brought their works home. They found it demanding and stressful because they could not finish that many administrative works with insufficient time at the office. 5.

Support Initial time of teaching was not an easy moment for novice teachers in

their journey of their teaching career. The initial time of teaching was also

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considered as the crucial period in their teaching. Fox and Singletary (1986) mentioned that support was highly needed in novice teachers‟ initial years in order to confront any problems which may arise in the classroom and at school. Thus, support was needed by Jalu and Kiki as novice teachers to pass their crucial period in their career. Karatas and Karaman (2013) put that there were two kinds of support providers for novice teachers. First, novice teachers might get support from the school where they work, such as mentor and coworkers. Besides that, Karatas and Karaman (2013) mentioned that novice teachers might receive personal support from their family and their perceived efficacy to help them to survive. Kiki and Jalu received support from the school where they worked, their family, and their perceived efficacy. First, Jalu and Kiki received support from the school principal and his vice. The school principal provided support by encouraging them to survive though it was not easy. The school principal supported them by building a good relationship with them. Moreover, the school principal also supervised them. The vice principal also supported them by providing guidance and supervision in dealing with administrative works. The vice principal played the role as the consultant for Jalu and Kiki in dealing with administrative works. Second, besides receiving support from the school principal and his vice, Jalu and Kiki received support from their colleagues or coworkers. Since their colleagues were mostly from the same alma mater with them and were in the relatively close age range, Kiki and Jalu could easily share their problems to their

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colleagues. Luckily, their coworkers were willing enough to share their similar experience at the first time they started to work. Even they would share their strategies to cope with certain problems in the classroom. Third, family was also one of the support providers for Kiki and Jalu to pass their crucial period in working as a teacher. Family was the entrusted and unalterable place the share what they experienced, what they felt towards the experience, and what they wanted actually. Family was a place to pour out their hearts and minds. Moreover, family was the endless source of support and encouragement for the novice teachers in undergoing their teaching career. Fourth, Kiki and Jalu‟s perceived self-efficacy was one of their personal supports which helped them to cope with problems in their initial period of teaching. They believed that they had the capacity to pass the crucial period and to cope with problems and challenges in it. Because of their perceived self-efficacy, they could pass it and could survive as English teachers at the primary level. 6.

Struggle and adaptation During their initial time of teaching, Jalu and Kiki faced with reality shock

and problems. Thus they needed to learn to adapt and to survive. Richards and Farrel (2005) mentioned that in dealing with their problems, novice teachers might employ their individual strategies. According to Richards and Farrel (2005) novice teachers‟ individual strategies were reflection, self-directed learning, and taking part in teacher support group. In order to cope with problems arose in their initial period of teaching, as novice teachers, Jalu and Kiki also employed their own or individual strategies. Based on their lived experience as novice English

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teachers at the primary level, it could be elucidated that they employed these following strategies: learning by doing; finding what works best; and joining training. Their first strategy was learning by doing. They employ this strategy when they had to deal administrative works which they did not know before. Since they never learnt how to develop annual program, semester program, syllabus, and any other administrative works, they learnt it from the examples. They tried to grasp the concept of those administrative works and then applied it and made it by themselves. This strategy could be seen as their self-directed learning because in dealing with administrative works, these novice teachers initiatively and responsibly learn from the examples, grasp the main idea, and then applied it in order to develop the administrative works. The second strategy was finding what works best. When Kiki and Jalu faced with the problem of classroom noisiness and chaos, they tried to find strategies to handle it which match with themselves and their students. They did not easily adopt other teachers‟ strategies. Even when they found their own strategies, Jalu and Kiki needed to checked whether those strategies was applicable or not for themselves and their class. The applicable strategies were then being used. For the strategies which did not work well were being improved. In this case, Jalu and Kiki did what so-called self-reflection in which they examined by themselves what strategies were applicable and worked best in their classroom.

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The third strategy was joining training or taking part in teacher support group. However, this strategy was only being employed by Kiki because Jalu had not got the opportunity yet to join such training. By join GLDPN training, Kiki got a lot of new knowledge and skills to cope with her daily problem in teaching English to young learners. Kiki were being trained about how to have good classroom management and how to teach by using certain teaching method which can interest and attract students to learn and can help students to learn better. Hence, after joining such training, Kiki was able to develop her professional that was to perform better in her employment. 7.

Current belief According to Kuzmic (1993) novice teachers‟ experience in their initial

years of teaching might determine their philosophy and attitude for the rest of their career. Likewise, Karatas and Karaman (2013) mentioned that the first years of teaching in teachers‟ career played significant role in shaping their future practice. Based on their story, culture shock and problems experienced by Jalu and Kiki during their initial time of their teaching career shaped and changed their initial beliefs. Dealing with problems in their in-service teaching turned their initial beliefs which were shaped during their pre-service education program into their current beliefs. Their current beliefs were the improvement of their initial beliefs or the counterpoint of their initial beliefs. First, they improved their initial belief which said that teaching English to young learners should be fun became teaching English to young learners should be fun and firm. Kiki and Jalu realized that when they were too loose to the

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students, they would make use of their looseness to be noisy and to play in the class. Thus, Kiki and Jalu shifted their belief into fun but strict. For them, teaching should be in fun way but at the same time firm to the students so that they would not be noisy and would not play during the lesson time. This current belief was depicted in the way Kiki applied certain classroom management strategies in her class recently. Also from Jalu‟s endeavor to be firm in his class recently and his plan to be firmer start from the beginning of the new school year. Jalu planned to have clear classroom rules and the consequences clearly in the upcoming school year. Then he would state it right at the first day of school and would be firm towards his rules. Second, they did not any longer believe that the key of successful teaching was a good lesson plan, but classroom management skills. According to them no matter how good the lesson plan was, if they could not control the classroom well then it would be useless. Even Kiki ever said In my searching of the right styles, I found that good lesson plan helped me in handling the class. When I have good lesson plan, I could control the class well so that it ran smoothly and the teaching objectives could be achieved well too. Yet, good classroom management is the most important strategy needed in handling the class. When we already have good classroom management whatever lesson plan we have (Interview3_K32) Third, they now believed that students were not the causal agent of classroom noisiness and chaos, but teacher was the one who responsible for the classroom chaos. Hence they believed that there was no bad student, but bad teacher. This belief was related to the previous belief about classroom management as the key of successful teaching.

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8.

Good time management One of novice teachers‟ prominent problems was working load (Veenman,

1984, Clift et al., 1995, Alexander and Galbraith, 1997, Crookes and Arakaki, 1999; and McCann and Johannessen, 2004). Crookes and Atakaki (1999) and McCann and Johannessen (2004) found that overwork associated with lack of time preparation time was the main problem faced by novice teachers during their initial years of teaching. Working load and lack of time preparation was also one of Kiki and Jalu‟s problem in their initial years of teaching. Kiki and Jalu were having piles of administrative works besides teaching. Furthermore, they sometimes were busy with the preparation of the up-coming school events. Unfortunately, the provided time to do administrative works during office time was not sufficient. Thus, they tried to be smart in managing their time well so that they did not need to always bring so many works home. Good time management skill was needed to cope with this problem. Thus they tried to work effevtively during their free time from teaching which was only 1 hour and 45 minutes a day. Moreover they also tried to be wise in choosing what kind of administrative works could be done effectively at the office and at home. However, they still sometimes brought those works home. 9.

Autonomy Kumaravadivelu (2006) mentioned that autonomy was the heart of post-

method pedagogy. Therefore, teachers were expected to be autonomous to develop a reflective approach to their own teaching, to initiate change in their

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teaching and to monitor the effects of such changes. Autonomy meant personal independence. It also meant someone‟s capacity to make his or her own decisions about his or her actions. Someone who had that capacity was called as autonomous person. As primary English teachers, Jalu and Kiki realized that they must be autonomous in teaching. Jalu and Kiki ever experienced teaching situations in which they could not teach accordingly to their planned teaching procedures and could not achieve their teaching objectives. From that experience they learn that actually they were allowed to not to adhere to their planned teaching procedures and might decide to change their teaching procedures as long as the teaching objectives could be achieved well. I realized that I should not always adhere to my teaching procedure in my lesson plan. When my planned teaching procedure does not work well, I should have initiative to change the plan and apply other activities as long as the teaching objectives could be achived well. (Interview3_K58) … lesson plan is not everything. At the beginning I always sticked to my teaching procedures in my lesson plan. When I could not teach as what I had planned, I felt disappointed. Now, I realize that when my planned teaching procedures or activities do not work, I should change it immediately into other activities. As long as the indicators are achived with the new activities, it is okay. (Interview2_J45) From that experience, they realized and learnt to be reflective to their own teaching acts, to initiate change in their classroom, and to monitor the effects of such changes. When they experienced inability to perform their planned teaching procedures they started to think and to realize that they could make such changes during their teaching when they met unexpected situation. In their next teaching,

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they started to initiate change when their planned teaching procedures could not be applied. Then, they also learnt to monitor the effects of such changes by making sure that changes in their teaching procedures could still help them and the students to achieve the teaching objectives. 10. Understanding children Brewster et al. (2004) mentioned that children had different characteristics from adults. According to them, children were physically active, having various emotional needs, easily forget things, and self oriented. Nunan (2011) stated that children‟s characteristics should be considered in designing learning activities and creating tasks and materials for them. In addition, Clarke (2010) put that each child‟s learning styles should be considered too. Hence, teachers must understand their students‟ characteristics and also learning styles which then should be considered in designing activities, tasks, and materials. From their experience in their initial years of teaching, Kiki and Jalu realized that children were unpredictable. Children were unpredictable because they were moody. Because of that, Jalu and Kiki needed to understand the children well, particularly their mood to learn that day. Their mood to learn was usually influenced by the time of learning. During the morning class, the students were in a good mood and cooperative. Contrastingly, the students were not in a good mood and uncooperative in the afternoon class. Because of that Kiki and Jalu differentiated their teaching procedures and the activities for morning and afternoon class. When I develop lesson plan I need to consider my students’characteristics, their mood, and also their condition whether

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they are tired or not. In the morning class, my students are usually still in the good mood and cooperative but in the afternoon class they are not cooperative at all. Therefore, lesson plan which I made and applied at grade 2 Sparkling might different from the one that I made and applied at grade 2 Glowing, but the teaching objectives were the same. (Interview3_K60) Furthermore they also realized that a classroom consisted of various students with different level of ability and learning ability. Kiki and Jalu realized that they should understand it in order to provide appropriate treatment for them. For instance, Kiki ever gave different amount of exercise for a student who had lower ability that other students and was slow in writing and understanding lesson. Similarly, Jalu also ever gave different treatment, an oral assessment, to a student who had lower ability that other students and was lazy and also liked to do things hastily. 11. Creativity Someone who is creative has the ability or power to create. As primary English teachers, Kiki and Jalu realized that they must be creative. They must be creative in designing activities immediately when their planned teaching procedures could not be applied at that moment. Both of them ever experienced the situation in which their planned teaching procedures could not be applied and it made them realized that they needed to be creative to switch or to find another activity which could also be used to achieve the learning objectives. Also in creating games, Jalu and Kiki realized that they should be creative because the students were easily bored with the same games played over again and again.

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Kiki revealed that I think I need to have a bank of ideas or activities so that when my activities could not work well in a certain situation I could change it imidiately. I realized that I should not always adhere to my teaching procedure in my lesson plan. When my planned teaching procedure does not work well, I should have initiative to change the plan and apply other activities as long as the teaching objectives could be achived well. (Interview3_K58) From Kiki‟s statemen above about bank of ideas or activities, it could be inferred that she realized that she should be creative to create such activity when her planned teaching procedure did not work well. Jalu shared one of his experiences which made him understand that creativity helped him. At the first time I did not have various collections of games or ice breakers. My collections were still limited and it made me gave them the same games again and again. Because of that my students ever said “It is boring!” It made me shoked. But then I learnt that children easily get bored and I need to have lots of ideas and to be creative with any games or activity which I applied in the class. (Interview2_J41) Facing children who got bored easily when they did the same games again and again made Jalu understand that he should be creative in creating games and activities. 12. Need Needs could be defined as anything necessary but lacking. What Jalu and Kiki had experienced so far in their initial times of teaching made them realized that they were lacking of classroom management skills. They wished for a training on classroom management so that they could perform better. It meant that they need training on classroom management. They revealed that

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I hope the school gives me opportunity to join a training like GLDPN continuously. (Interview5_K23) I think classroom management training is needed. I think I am not the only teacher who needs that kind of training because some of my friends are also young teacher and have the same difficulties in classroom management like me. Thus we need it so much. (Interview3_J33) As Veenman (1984), Clift et al. (1995), Alexander and Galbraith (1997), Crookes and Arakaki (1999) and McCann and Johannessen (2004) mentioned that classroom management was one of the most prominent problems faced by novice teachers. Both of Kiki and Jalu also faced that classroom management was one of their outstanding problems in their initial years of teaching. From their reflection on their past experience in their initial years of teaching, Kiki and Jalu realized that classroom management was important in teaching. It was in accordance to what Reschly (2007) put that teachers‟ ability to organize and manage the students‟ behavior was important to achive educational outcomes. Since it was necessary but lacking, Kiki and Jalu needed to get classroom management training.

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CHAPTER V CONCLUSION

This chapter consists of two parts. They are the conclusion that contains the summary of my study and the answer to my research question and the suggestions.

A. CONCLUSION This study aimed to reveal the lived experience of novice English teachers at the primary level. In this study I involved two novice primary English teachers, who were willing to have an extended engagement to tell their experience during their initial years of teaching and to develop narrative stories of their experiences, as the participants in this study. In order to answer the research question, I did indepth interviews to narrate the participants‟ stories. Thus, I was able to compose the participants‟ past stories (anecdote) of their lived experiences during their initial years of teaching. After describing the lived experience of novice English teachers at a primary level, I interpreted it in order to unveil the essence of their lived experience. Kiki and Jalu learn that besides teaching English in fun ways, being firm is needed in teaching English at a primary level. Being firm is related to the importance of classroom management in teaching English to young learners. When teachers are firm towards the classroom rules, as the results the students will behave in accordance to the rules and thus the teaching and learning process

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can run smoothly. Teachers need to teach English in fun ways in order to interest the children to learn. When the teachers are firm towards the classroom rules and are teaching English in fun ways, children can learn better and can achieve the expected outcomes well. Hence teaching English to young learners should be fun and firm. A well planned lesson plan is not the ultimate key success in teaching. No matter how good the lesson plan is, it will be useless without good classroom management. When the students behaved well and the classroom situation is under controlled, teachers could apply any learning activities and thus could achieve the teaching objectives well. Hence, good classroom management is the key success in teaching. Since classroom management plays an important role in making the children behave well and in controlling the classroom situation, children could not be blamed as the causal agent of classroom noisiness and chaos. When the class became noisy and chaotic, the teacher iss the one who should be blamed since he or she do not manage the class and the students‟ behavior well. The students are not the casual agent of classroom noisiness and chaos, but the teacher is the one who is responsible for the classroom chaos. Besides having good classroom management, understanding children is also important in teaching English to young learners. Children‟s characteristics need to be considered in designing learning activities, tasks, and materials. Furthermore, since a classroom might consist of various students with different level of ability and learning style, Kiki and Jalu learn that they should understand

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and should be sensitive towards children who have low ability and different learning style so that appropriate treatment for those children could be provided. Creativity is needed by English teachers at a primary level for creating various interesting activities. Children are having unique characteristics which are different from adults. Jalu and Kiki noticed that children are unpredictable, moody, and easy to get bored. Since children are easy to get bored, Jalu and Kiki learn that the same activities and games could not be done again and again. Being creative in designing activities and games helps them to make the students interested to learn. Besides creativity, autonomy is also needed in teaching English to young learners. Teachers need to be autonomous to initiate changes in their teaching when their planned teaching procedures do not work well because of the unpredicted situation. Furthermore, being autonomous to initiate changes in teaching is needed because adhering to the planned teaching procedures which do not work well would disadvantage the children. It disadvantages the children since the objectives of teaching could not be achieved well. Novice teachers‟ initial years of teaching are not easy to be passed. They face reality shock, problems, and the up and down of feelings throughout the beginning years of their teaching career. Supports from the school, their family, and their perceived self-efficacy strengthen them to survive and not to abandon their job as English teachers at a primary level. Support from the school, their family, and their perceived self-efficacy help novice English teachers to survive in the crucial times of their teaching career. Furthermore, their struggle and

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adaptation in which they employ their own strategies to deal with problems arouse also help them to survive.

B. SUGGESTIONS Teaching English to young learners is not a trivial job. English teachers at the primary level need to have good classroom management skills and understanding of children. Because of that I suggest both of the participants to always explore their knowledge of classroom management and children characteristics by reading various resources and sharing lived experiences in order to expand their knowledge and empower themselves to prepare better as English teachers at a primary school. Moreover, I also suggest the participants to have good time management because they have many works to do, yet so little time to accomplish. Hopefully, by having good tima management, they would not bring extra works home anymore. The school boards and experienced teachers who work at the same site with Kiki and Jalu should be sensitive better towards what they faced during their initial years of teaching, such as reality shock, problems, and the up and down of feelings. Then, I suggest the school boards and experienced teachers to provide mentoring, support, and in house training for novice teachers. The school boards might assign one of the experienced teachers to be Kiki and Jalu‟s mentor who will listen, support, and help them to learn from their own experience in order to develop or to perform better as primary English teacher. The school boards might also hold in-house trainings related to the problem faced

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by Kiki and Jalu. I suggest the school board to hold in house trainings on classroom management and administrative works. Furthermore, I also hope that experienced teachers are willing to share their experience and to encourage novice teachers to survive. Teacher educator should also be sensitive towards novice teachers‟ experience during their initial career. I suggest them to examine and then to bridge the gap between the academic course content in the pre-service education program and the reality of language classroom faced by novice teachers. Moreover, I suggest teacher educators to provide and invite novice teachers to trainings or seminars on classroom management, teaching English to young learners, curriculum and syllabus design, and also material or tasks design. I hope pre-service teachers could have better idea of the crucial moment in their beginning career later. The idea of a real language classroom, culture shock, problems, and teachers responsibilities obtained from this study could be used as one of their consideration in preparing themselves for employement. I suggest pre-service teacher to explore more their knowledge on teaching English to young learners, classroom management, curriculum and syllabus design, and also material and tasks design in order to reduce or even overcome the problems which might arise during their initial years of teaching later. Furthermore, I hope common readers who read this study could gain comprehensible and empathic understanding towards novice teachers‟ experience during their initial years of teaching. I expect common readers would not underestimate the job as a primary English teacher since it is not a trivial job at

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all. Moreover, I hope the readers would not demand novice teachers to perform as well as experienced teachers and would not blame novice teachers for their failure in teaching. I suggest common readers to support and to encourage novice teachers whom they know so that the next generation of teachers would not extinct. The finding of this study, a clear understanding of novice English teachers experience at a primary level during their initial years of teaching, might contribute insight to the theory of English teacher education and the development of teaching English to young learners, particularly in Indonesian context. Since studies on novice English teachers, particularly in the TESOL education context are not many, I encourage other academician to do research on novice English teachers. For those who are interested in doing research on it, I suggest them to do research at different level of education, such as secondary, senior, university, and even preschool.

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APPENDICES

APPENDIX 1 Interview Questions Guideline

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APPENDIX 2 Kiki’s Interview Transcripts Interview Transcript 1 Day and date : Thursday, January 30, 2014 Time : 20.07 p.m. – 21.02 p.m. The interview was done through chatting on WhatsApp A : Adesia K : Kiki Interview 1 A1 K1 A2 K2

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Text Kiki lulus kuliah langsung ngajar di Bethany ya? Waduh nah itu …. Hehe … Iya mbak… Kamu memang cita-citanya jadi guru ya? Khan banyak tuh temen-temen kita yang lulus nggak mau jadi guru… Oke mbak … aku ga cita-cita jadi guru awalnya … waktu kecil sih emang suka main guru-guru nan tapi setelah gede nggak pengen jadi guru … karena tanggung jawab yang gede dan image yang nggak terlalu bagus buat jadi guru. Lha terus kok sekarang ngajar? Awalnya khan aku nggak pasti pengen kerja apa. Aku sempat nglamar di perusahaan, tapi setelah aku pikir-pikir my expertise kan ya dingajar kalau di perusahaan pasti nanti monoton dan aku harus belajar lagi, dan pasti Bahasa Inggris nggak kepake kayak teman-teman yang nggak jadi guru. Ohh gitu…, terus nglamar kerja di Bethany? Atau ada sekolah lain yang dikirim lamaran kerja? Itu di Bethany juga karena ada yang sms aku kalau di buka lowongan guru… nah aku coba masukin lamaran dan diterima ternyata. Ohhhh begitu…. Sebenernya kamu memang berharapnya ditempatkan kelas besar apa kecil, maksudku pengennya di SD atau pengenya di SMP, SMA, atau malah pre-school? Aku sebenernya pengen kalau kecil ya kecil sekalian kayak preschool dan kalau besar ya besar sekalian kayak SMA. Waktu di wawancara aku pilih pre-schoolnya Bethany sebenere… tapi karena pertimbangan kemampuan dan sebagainya aku dimasukan di SD gitu mbak. Pas dimasukin di SD kamu ditawari kelas berapa gitu nggak? Apa langsung dikasih kamu handle kelas 3 dan 4? Iya kelas 2… aku sekarang bisa di kelas 3 dan 4 karena memang 115


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di Bethany tiap tahun gurunya dioplos mbak. Ooohhh… jadi memang systemnya rolling gitu? Gonta-ganti? Bisa jadi tahun depan beda lagi ya? Iya mbak… Kamu tahu nggak kenapa regulasinya begitu? Terus dulu kamu ngajar kelas 2 aja kok sekarang oplosane jadi 2 level 3 sama 4 kenapa? Aku ga tau tepatnya kenapa mbak ... Yang pasti karena kita nggak pake system guru kelas makanya lebih fleksibel. Ohhh jadi guru subject ya modelnya? Kamu guru subject aja atau sama home room teacher? Eh ada home room teachernya ga sih? Aku guru subject dan home room teacher kelas 4 mbak sekarang Pas pertama kali ngajar di kelas 2 itu udah jadi home room juga? Aku jadi assisstent homeroom teacher kelas 2 waktu itu. Ooohhh…. Ada assisstent juga to? Iya mbak. Eh, pas pertama kali kamu mulai ngajar Bahasa Inggris, bukan jadi assisstent home room ya, kamu gimana rasanya? Nervous, apa excited apa piye? Awalnya setress banget mbak, karena anak-anaknya hiper aktif… mereka brutal banget sama guru yang baru dan nggak tegas. Jadi waktu itu setiap selesai ngajar harus evaluasi diri sendiri gimana biar anak-anak bisa diem dan menerima pelajaran dengan baik… dan salah satu hal yang nggak pernah di pelajari di FBS pas kuliah dan padahal penting banget adalah class management. Cuma diajari buat perencanaan dan evaluasi ... tapi untuk menghadapi murid-murid yang kompleks nggak pernah dipelajari. I learn naturally from the environment.

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Interview Transcript 2 Day and date : Sunday, February 9, 2014 Time : 09.28 a.m. – 09.48 a.m. The interview was done through chatting on WhatsApp A : Adesia K : Kiki

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Text Kiki, dulu awal lulus SMA memang pilihan utama kuliah di FBS? Atau ada cita-cita kuliah di tempat lain dan jurusan berbeda? Dulu bingung mau masuk fsm atau fbs mbak ... tapi atas banyak pertimbangan masa depan dan saran kakak, aku masuk FBS. Kalau boleh tau pertimbangan maksudnya alasannya untuk memutusakan ambil FBS aja, itu apa? Kalau Bahasa Inggris itu lebih flexible mbak mau jadi apa aja gitu… Kiki lulus tahun berapa ya? Masih inget bulannya ga? Terus mulai kerja tahun berapa, sama bulannya sekalian ya? Aku lulus tahun 2012 bulan Maret, terus kerja mulai 2012 Juni.

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Interview Transcript 3 Day and date : Sunday, February 16, 2014 Time : 10.00 a.m. – 12.00 a.m. Location : Paprika Resto Jl. Jendral Sudirman no. 175, Salatiga A : Adesia K : Kiki Interview 3 A1 K1 A2 K2 A3 K3

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Text Kita mulai dari perkenalan ya, nama lengkapnya? Sama tanggal lahir ya? Kiki Kurniawati, 29 Maret 1989 Dari kecil, dari lahir di Salatiga, asli Salatiga? Iya Pas sekolah, dari lulus SMA memang pengen masuk FBS? Sebenernya ada 2 pilihan mau masuk FSM (Fakultas Sains dan Matematika) atau Bahasa Inggris tapi karena pertimbangan dan banyak pertimbangan lah, pertimbangannya masalah nanti kedepannya gimana, nanti kalau matematika itu lebih sempit dan sebagainya. Lalu kakak juga menyarankan di Bahasa Inggris, yausdah akhirnya masuknya ke FBS. Di rumah panggilannya, Kiki juga? Iya. Saudara ada berapa? Satu. Perempuan? Iya, kakak. Dia 8 tahun di atas. Kakak kerja? Iya, perawat. Berarti, seperti ceritamu yang waktu kemarin itu, kuliah di FBS terus lulus kuliah langsung kerja. Trus pas itu kamu cerita kalau jadi guru itu sebenernya ga bercita-cita jadi guru karena tanggung jawab guru itu gede dan juga karena image nya yang begitu bagus. Maksudnya imagenya yang begitu bagus itu gimana? Imagenya itu khan sekarang ini guru-guru banyak sekali yang misalnya sekarang itu khan lesson plan ga ada, ya guru cuman datang, masih konserfatif gitu, jadi misalkan di kelas ya sudah misalkan menulis di papan tulis, murid-murid ya cuma mendengarkan atau cuma menyalin ya cuma seperti itu. Jadi banyak sekali orang-orang yang berfikir kalau guru itu ya cuman kerjaannya gitu-gitu aja gitu lho, tanpa ada memiliki apa ya

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kualitas tertentu tuh ga ada. Ya jadi guru itu ya udah, misalkan “Mau jadi apa?” “Jadi guru.” Pasti orang langsung menyepelekan gitu. Karena orang pikirnya jadi guru tuh gampang, sepele, ngajar-tinggal ngajar, tidak ada beban apa-apa, pulangnya lebih awal, liburnya sama kayak anak sekolah khan padahal beban pekerjaannya banyak. Apalagi kalau misalkan lembur di rumah itu sebenarnya banyak, apalagi yang di… apa ya… hubungan kita khan sama manusia gitu lho mbak. Jadinya kalau misalkan… kalau sama komputer khan beda ya, kalau komputer salah yaudah jelas salah, tapi kalau sama anak itu khan ga jelas. Maksudnya, oh ya… mungkin… mungkin anak itu kenapa kita harus berfikir juga anak itu buat masalah di sekolahan kita juga harus ini mikirin juga gimana nanti gimana kita ke orang tuanya, bagaimana untuk memperbaiki anak itu, kayak gitu kayak gitu… Bisanya kalau lembur, yang dikerjakan di rumah itu apa? Biasanya RPP, RPP itu pasti karena RPP itu susah sekali untuk punya ide kalau waktu di kantor karena waktu di kantor itu administrasinya pun banyak apalagi di Bethany itu ga cuman RPP mbak. Kalau RPP itu khan sudah pasti sendiri, lalu untuk soal, karena kita sekolahannya ga negeri tapi swasta soal itu harus buat sendiri, dan itu bentuknya kayak kuis, monthly test, lalu apakah itu speaking test atau presentasi, kayak gitu kayak gitu dan apa lagi ya, kalau misalkan di Bethany itu ada monthly schedule, summary, jadi kayak module semuanya itu buat sendiri, jadinya memang administrasinya sangat banyak. Kiki kalau ngajar pake text book apa? Maksudnya di sekolah textbooknya apa? Iya mbak, pakenya My Pals. Terus tadi khan Kiki cerita kalau jadi guru tuh harus ngerti si anak itu masalahnya apa. Ada pengalaman ga, ada cerita ga tentang ini yang Kiki hadapi selama ini anak-anak itu masalahnya apa sih? Kalau permasalahannya itu banyak mbak, misalkan kalau anak di Bethany itu permasalahannya bukan lagi ke masalah ekonomi itu nggak karena mereka mmm…. apa ya golongongan orang tuanya khan udah menengah ke atas, cuman masalahnya itu ya orang tuanya ada yang bermasalah misalnya tidak harmonis, itu nanti ngaruhnya khan ke anaknya, anaknya itu tiba-tiba murung sendiri. Kenapa sih kok tiba-tiba murung? Pelajaran kok nggak ngerti-ngerti sih? Kayak gitu. Nanti kita ada kita sampaikan ke orang tua, tapi orang tua khan pasti juga apa ya… tidak terlalu apa ya… membuka masalah apa nya khan enggak. Jadi ya kayak gitu misalkan. Terus misalkan, anak itu punya learning difficulties tuh juga ada mbak. Misalkan dia di kelas itu sama sekali… mmm…. Jadi gini karena gaya belajarnya orang tuanya itu berbeda dengan gurunya

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misalkan gurunya khan di sekolah pake Bahasa Inggris terus, tetapi mungkin anak ini punya masalah di Bahasa Inggris, tapi kalau di pelajaran Bahasa Inggris dia nggak bermasalah, jadi misalkan soal Bahasa Inggris tuh, dia ngerti tapi kalau pelajaran lain, misalkan science dengan Bahasa Inggris, dia sama sekali nggak ngerti, kalau diajak ngomong pake Bahasa Inggris dia nggak ngerti, tapi kalau pelajaran Inggris dia ngerti kayak gitu. Jadi kayak anak ini memiliki learning difficulties yang apa ya yang special gitu lho kayak gitu misalkan. Kalau udah kayak gitu nanti disampaikan ke orang tuanya, orang tuanya akan ngomong “Lhoh anak init tuh mengerti, kalau saya ajari, belajar di rumah sama saya tuh mengerti” tapi kalau sudah sampai di sekolahan itu nilainya jelek semua gitu lho. Nah itu khan, kayak apa ya… harus menjembatani antara sebenernya memang gaya belajarnya di rumah yang berbeda atau anaknya ini memang tidak mengerti gitu lho. Kalau khusus di pelajaran Bahasa Inggris pernah ga menghadapi anak yang bermasalah? Iya. Nah itu salah satunya itu, anak yang sama itu juga. Jadi kalau misal khan dia soal gitu ya soal misalnya dibolak-balik gitu, dia akan bingung, jawabannya akan berbeda. Sebenernya soalnya sama mbak, cuman nomernya dibolak-balik urutannya. Dia jawabnnya bisa beda mbak, jadi itu, anak itu kalau diajak ngomong pake Bahasa Inggris, anak itu cuman “mmmm….?” tapi kalau nanti dia dikasih soal, nanti dia bisa mengerjakan separoh lebih. Jadi kayak, ga tau tuh kenapa anaknya. Jadi sampai sekarang juga masih dicari-cari, kalau misalkan kalau untuk menyebutkan pasti dia tau, tapi kalau sudah masuk kayak ke grammar lalu ke apa ya… kayak bentuk yang sudah sentence dia sudah kesusahan gitu. Hmm…. Berarti kalau menyebutkan vocab gitu masih bisa? Vocab, kalau vocab masih iya bisa walaupun tulisannya juga salah. Tulisannya tapi ya gapapalah ya… tulisannya masih kita benerin kayak gitu-kayak gitu. Itu khan masalahnya dengan parents juga ya, dari sekolah apakah sekolah mewadahi? Iya jadi sekolah bantunya lewat memberikan tambahan ke anak itu untuk mata pelajaran yang dia ga bisa, kayak gitu. Tapi kalau untuk Bahasa Inggris, karena permasalahannya anak ini special, di Bahasa Inggris dia ga bermasalah, di pelajaran Bahasa Inggris dia tidak di bawah KKM, tapi untuk pelajaran science yang menggunakan Bahasa Inggris dia di bawah KKM kayak gitu. Jadi untuk satu anak ini memang penanganannya masih selalu diperhatikan dalam kelas. Kalau di dalam kelas dia, temantemannya sudah selesai, guru itu masih ngajari dia untuk menulis, untuk apa…. Jadi di dalam kelas itu dia paling special

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gitu. Ada pertanyaan pasti ditujukan ke dia, karena kalau nggak gitu takutnya nanti dia sama sekali nggak ngerti. Kalau di kelas, biasanya dia itu cuman diem terus nanti kalau anak itu ditegur nanti responya cuman “hee? Apa Miss? What?” Nanti kalau di suruh ngerjain ga ngerti lagi. Instruksi ga ngerti, dia ga ngerti. Untuk sentence ga ngerti, belum ngerti. Tapi mungkin karena faktor umurnya dia masih muda. Untuk menghadapi anak “special” ini Kiki dibantu, ada support ga dari teman-teman guru? Atau waktu pertama menghadapi anak ini Kiki menyelesaikan masalah ini sendiri? Awalnya nyelesein sendiri, karena ooh… anak ini mungkin perlu 2 atau 3 kali untuk mengerti. Tapi ternyata kok juga banyak guru yang keluhannya sama tiap pelajaran yang pake Bahasa Inggris, anaknya tidak bisa memahami. Bahkan untuk pelajaran Bahasa Indonesia dan PKn pun mengalami kesulitan, jadi seperti logical thinkingnya dia belum jalan. Misalkan untuk pelajaran PKn gitu ya, misalkan “Pekerjaan apa yang bisa kamu lakukan di rumah untuk membantu orang tua?” Dia jawabannya akan berbeda dengan teman-teman yang lainnya. Misalkan dia apa sendiri. Jadi memang dia apa ya ya memang masih belum bisa berfikir apa ya logikanya belum ini… nalarnya belum terlalu jalan gitu. Waktu pertama kali menghadapi anak “special” ini setres ga? Kok diajarin ga ngerti-ngerti atau gimana? Karena dia untuk Bahasa Inggris masih ga di bawah KKM, jadi aku ga masalah awalnya. Yaudah normal aja kalau anak ini nilainya nggak setinggi temannya, misalnya temannya 90 terus dia cuman dapat 73 tapi udah di atas KKM menurutku nggak papa waktu itu. Tapi lama-kelamaan dia ga mengerti, instruksi ga mengerti, gitu. Lama-lama, khan memang awalnya dulu khan masih apa ya mbak… karena guru baru awalnya guru baru itu kayak masih alus gitu ya… maksudnya masih kayak “Ayo come on!” masih yang gitu khan, masih yang kayak apa ya… kita terus ngereh-reh gitu. Tapi lama-kelamaan khan jadi ini lama-lama metode nya khan jadi ini berbeda… mm…. “Pay attention!” lama-lama jadi kayak strict gitu lho mbak, jadi “Kamu harus gini… kamu harus mendengarkan!” Karena dia sekali tidak digituin dia akan lost mbak, yang melamun, yang tiba-tiba apa sendiri, gitu-gitu, bermain sendiri, terus tiba-tiba ketawa sendiri padahal temen-temenya enggak. Terus orang lain pasti bilang “Lhoo kamu kenapa?” Padahal kadang temennya itu ga mau sekelompok sama dia, mbak, karena dia... karena ya itu dia memang daya tangkapnya ya itu slow learner itu tadi. Terus kalau temennya ga ada yang mau sekelompok gitu terus? Ya aku paksa, temennya yang pinter pun aku paksa harus mau sekelompok sama dia. Harus mau, apa ya… biar yang pinterpun bisa istilahnya ngajari dia. Soalnya takutnya dia digituin terus, di

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kelompok lain juga ga mau sama dia karena dia yang paling… jadi kalau misalnya ada average dia itu memang gap nya memang bener-bener paling terlalu membuat jauh gapnya ya dia itu sendiri. Jadi kalau misalkan yang lainnya itu bisa above average bahkan untuk Bahasa Inggris itu anak-anak lainnya itu bisa 90 itu sangat gampang sekali, tapi kalau dia… yaudah 80 itu udah paling bagus gitu, kayak gitu. Ya dia itu rangenya itu 7080. Yang paling kesalahanya tuh ya itu, tapi kadang khan apa ya? Tulisan masih aku betulin, nah makanya itu kadang aku ada beberapa kali itu spelling ga tak benerin mbak, malah aku kurangin, memang orang tuanya pasti complaint, “Loh Miss. Kiki mbok ini jangan dikurangi khan dia mengerti maksudnya.” Tapi aku bilang “Iya, Mam tapi ini kita belajar bahasa dan ini sudah pernah di kelas 2.” Jadi di kelas 2 sudah pernah gitu lho mbak materinya, nah kalau di kelas 3 dia melakukan kesalahan yang bahkan teman-teman nya sudah tidak melakukan nanti takutnya nilainya 100 semua kalau lama-lama kalau misalkan spellingnya juga dibenerin, kayak gitu. Pas menghadapi masalah ini, ada sharing ga sama guru lain? Iya, pernah memang sempat. Bahkan guru lainpun juga sharing masalah yang sama kan, tapi memang guru lain selalu bilang “Ki, dia itu butuhnya itu diajari Bahasa Inggris, karena di science itu dia sama sekali nggak ngerti”. Lalu aku bilang “Ya memang dia science nggak ngerti, tapi di Bahasa Inggris dia tidak bermasalah kalau aku memberikan tambahan ya aku bisanya memberikan tambahan Bahasa Inggris dalam bentuk science”. Gitu mbak, jadinya memang susah. Soalnya anak ini kalau Bahasa Inggris tidak terlalu bermasalah, jadi bentuk soal apapun dia masih di atas KKM jadi nggak ada justifikasi kenapa dia harus ikut tambahan pelajaran Bahasa Inggris, padahal nilai Bahasa Inggrisnya sudah di atas KKM gitu. Jadinya ya udah…. Kamu merasa nggak kalau kamu tuh kok jadi yang dilimpahi masalah anak ini? Ooohhh…. Enggak karena ya memang anak ini ya memang ga bisa Bahasa Inggrisnya itu memang ga mengerti, tapi dia di hafalan memang kayaknya pinter, dia kalau untuk menghafalkan object itu bagus. Tapi kalau tulisan, bentuk kalimat, instruksi itu memang ga bisa, kayaknya belum bisa. Dari kepala sekolah ada support ga ke Kiki untuk masalah ini? Kalau kepala sekolah ya memang hanya menerima ada keluhan apa, enaknya solusinya apa. Nah karena memang dia masalahnya di science ya akhirnya tambahan pelajaran yang diberikan ya science. Jadi bukan tambahan Bahasa Inggris, karena sebenernya permasalahan untuk anak ini tuh sangat global. Dia itu mamang kemampuan nalarnya itu memang belum seperti temennya. Ya akhirnya, yang kelihatan dulu masalahnya khan di science, ya

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tambahannya di science. Kalau dari kamu sendiri ga ada treatment khusus untuk dia? Misal soal utnuk dia lebih mudah dari yang lainnya? Ooohh, ga bisa mbak kalau gitu mbak. Soale untuk dia di pelajaran Bahasa Inggris nilainya ga di bawah KKM, kalau soal untuk dia dipermudah, dia pasti dapat 100 mbak, yaa khan? Soale dia ga bermasalah di Bahasa Inggris, kecuali dia bermasalah. Itu mungkin nanti bisa…. Itu ada mbak… ada anak lain yang memang dia tidak terlalu bisa Bahasa Inggris, Jadi pasti dia selalu tanya “Miss, can I speak in Bahasa?” itu pasti dia selalu pasti tanya. Nah untuk anak-anak seperti ini aku masih bisa, apa ya untuk menurunkan soalnya misalnya aku buat agak berbeda, misalnya lebih gampang. Tapi kalau untuk yang tadi, yang „special‟ tadi nggak. Ohhh… tapi pernah kasih treatment soal yang berbeda? Iya, jadi misalnya temen-temennya itu, misalnya ada 10 soal ya mbak, dia cukup mengerjakan itu 5 soal tapi dia mengerti, 5 soal kayak gitu. Soalnya apa ya, kadang dia itu untuk menulispun temennya 5 menit selesai, dia itu bisa 1 jam pelajaran hanya untuk menulis, gitu… Kalau ga “Ayo!! Ayo!” nggak digituin tuh ga bakal dia selesai. Jadi dulu pernah semua dibuat sama tapi ternyata hasilnya…. He‟em ternyata hasilnya kayak gitu … catatannya amburadul, orang tuanya ya bilang kok catatannya ga lengkap dan sebagainya…. Padahal anaknya sendiri memang nggak bisa 2 jam pelajaran pun ga bisa Akhirnya dibuat variasi? Iya dibuat variasi, temennya mengerjakan berapa, dia hanya berapa, temanya mencatat missal lebih detail dan examples nya banyak, dia cukup berapa gitu. Misalnya temennya aku minta “List 20 words!” gitu ya tentang things in the birthday party. Temanya misalkan bisa menyebutkan 20-30 items, dia cukup 10 aja wes aku gapapa. 10 itu sudah bagus… yaudah dia akan memenuhi 10 itu dan 10 itupun lama mbak… 1, 2 jam itu nggak cukup… tapi yowes gpp lah yang benting bisa, at least ada 10 itu bagus. Ide ngasih variasi soal itu dari Kiki sendiri atau? He‟e dari sendiri mbak. Jadi misalkan kadang ada spontant, kok anak ini ga ngerti ya, kadang khan di RPP ga ada khan perencanaan kalau anak ga bisa khan makanya waktu dilihat waktu dijelasin oh dia ga ngerti terus yang langsung spontaneous aja dia dikasih ini aja yang beda yang lainnya tetap yang itu… Berarti sekarang ngajarnya berubah ya… kalau sekarang jadi lebih strict ya... berarti dulu pandanganmu tentang ngajar anak kecil itu harusnya yang… He‟e harusnya yang nice, yang apa-apa itu dibuatnya harusnya 123


yang enak gitu pokoknya, kayak kita ngajar mulai dengan “Good Morning…” (sambil memeragakan dengan gaya yang ramah) Apa ya… yang kita pelajari dulu khan gitu too…. Kalau kita ngajar anak-anak ya kita harus seperti anak-anak dan kita harus menyenangkan biar anak-anak senang gitu khan, tapi metode kayak gitu itu enggak berlaku setiap saat, karena saat kita enak menyenangkan, anak-anak itu akan mempergunakan… ooh… gurunya baik, berarti aku melakukan apa saja bisa, di kelas aku bisa mau main-main sama temen, apa-apa paling gurunya ga akan marah, itu selalu terjadi gitu. Kalau ada guru baru, pasti kayak gitu anak-anak, pasti mereka suka dengan guru baru itu dan akhirnya nanti kalau ada pelajaran dia kelas itu ya sudah nanti ada yang teriak-teriak… kelas itu jadinya udah kayak apa…. Kalau sekarang, aku masuk kelas itu udah langsung hitung dulu. Misalkan 1-10, dan 10 belum duduk berarti ini, dia harus melakukan sesuatu. Kalau di kelasku biasanya yang itu lho mbak, pake gerakan-gerakan misalnya kayak COCONUT (C-OC-O-U-N-U-T) pake gerakan-gerakan gitu. Itu hukuman untuk mereka kalau mereka waktu aku masuk belum siap. Karena kalau misalnya kita masuk dan mereka nggak aware sama keberadaan kita, itu udah parah banget, karena nanti akhirnya nanti di kelas saat pembelajaran pastinya akan sangat parah gitu. Karena waktu aku awal masuk, kelas yang aku ajar khan kelas 2 sama kelas 3. Yang kelas 2 ini wah bener-bener parah. Aku masuk to mbak, ada yang megangi kakiku. Ada yang meganggi kakiku mbak… dia itu kayak apa ya… “ngganduli” kakiku terus berpura-pura jadi kayak anjing mbak. Terus dia kayak jilatinjilatin gitu mbak… Itu di tengah-tengah pelajaran lho mbak… sampe aku tuh bener-bener … dia tak lepasin ga mau, tak suruh duduk ga mau, tak bentak ga mau. Karena dia sudah biasa dengan aku yang ga pernah marah gitu lho… Terus ada yang teriak-teriak. Jadi kalo ada activitas, misalnya games yang sebenernya menyenangkan gitu ya kalau masuk kelas itu pasti malah ga menyenagkan pasti malah wwooohhh…. Malah kayak jadi bener-bener kayak di hutan. Padahal satu kelas itu maksimal cuman 15 anak lho mbak… 15 anak sudah apa ya….. wooooohhh… membuat keriuhan kayak gitu. Sampe beberapa kali itu waktu aku ngajar kepala sekolahnya itu pasti masuk, khan takut… pada takut sama kepala sekolah gitu…. Kepala sekolahku sampe masuk mbak… Karena apa? Karena itu keadaan kelasnya tuh memang sudah ga bisa dikontrol sama guru mbak… karena aku terlalu baik. Makanya mulai tahun ajaran baru ini aku mengubah metode ku. Yaudah sekarang aku hitung 1 – 10, kamu enggak duduk itu berarti kamu ga siap, sekarang sudah kayak gitu mbak strict. Tapi bukan yang wuuuhhh untuk

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tunjuk jari bertanya aja takut ya endak sampe segitu. Aku masih ngasih kesempatan mereka berekspresi itu iya, tapi ada batasnya, kayak gitu sih mbak… Yang ide kamu di awal pelajaran sebelum mulai kamu hitung 1 sampe 10 itu dari mana? Emmm jadi setiap guru itu kayak gitu mbak. Jadi setiap guru apa ya… memang menghitung 1-10 agar anak-anaknya itu duduk, jadi semua diseragamkan kalau pengen anak-anak duduk ya hitung 1-10 tapi guru-guru itu memang hukumannya masingmasing berbeda, kalau sampai 10 masih ada yang belum duduk ada yang stand in the corner, ada yang apa… beda-beda terganting gurnya pengennya kayak apa… gitu. Pas memutuskan 1-10 itu ada team sharing atau gimana? Enggak mbak, jadi dari kita lihat… jadi dulu khan awalnya kayak dicangkokan, satu guru baru itu dicangkokan ke wali kelas yang lama, yang udah lama… oohh tau ooohhh caranya gini… Jadi kita belajarnya sendiri, gini to caranya guru ini, ohh ya udah dipakai… dipake akhirnya yaudah seragam akhirnya. Kalau Kiki tadi itu hukumannya gimana sih? Itu tuh kayak spelling tapi pake gerakan gitu lho mbak… Karena untuk kelas yang lebih besar kelas 3 dan kelas 4 itu sudah sangat efektif karena mereka sudah tau malu gitu lho mbak… Jadi kalau digituin di depan kelas tuh malu ya… jadi aku harus duduk. Tapi kalau untuk anak kelas 1 kelas 2 digituin malah seneng. Yang hitungan 1-10 itu hanya untuk membuat anak duduk atau juga untuk siap belajar, siap dengan buku-buku? Buku udah harus siap mbak… Pas kamu pertama kali datang ke sekolah, kamu dikasih waktu untuk observasi dulu, perkenalan dengan lingkungan? Iya itu ada. Jadi khan sebelum aku ngajar itu sebelum tahun ajaran baru khan ada waktu sekitar 2 minggu, itu khan memang dikenalin biasa lah dikenalin dengan peraturannya, bagaimana membuat PROTA, PROMES yang dikuliahan aja ga pernah diajari buatnya. Itu apasih? Program Tahunan, Program Semester. Terus mbak selain itu aku harus buat syllabus sendiri, itu khan kita ga terlalu di-ini-in gitu lho mbak. Dah perkenalan administrasi baru setelah mereka masuk, mereka ada waktu 3 hari masa orientasi, kita juga ikut masa orientasi itu, oh jadi kita lihat anak-anaknya seperti ini. Anak-anak diminta untuk mengenal Miss atau Mr –nya yang baru, kayak gitu sih, tapi pas masuk yaudah…. Waktu itu pas masuk aku ga mendapatkan waktu untuk observasi karena waktu itu apa ya memang sangat dibutuhkan aku dibutuhkan untuk segera untuk mengajar Bahasa Inggris. Jadi aku tidak diberikan waktu untuk observasi bagaimana seharusnya aku menangani 125


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anak itu. Makanya itu saat akau menghadapi setress ya itu benerbener kayak… woooouuuuuuhhh… kayaknya setresnya tuh ga bisa ngomong sama siapa tuh ga bia gitu lho mbak, itu penanganan kelasku sendiri. Aku sharing ke siapa… metode mereka beda... Mereka bilang “Kalau metode ku begini…kalau aku gini… kalau aku ginii...” Pada akhirnya itu ga bisa berlaku semua, karena mereka punya style sendiri-sendiri, kalau yang udah dari sana nya galak, yaudah dia begitu…. Aku khan ga mungkin tiba-tiba pakai stylenya dia yang galaknya begitu khan mbak… anak-anak nanti malah justru akan langsung reluctant gitu khan sama aku, makanya aku sampai bingung aku harus nyari yang mana nih? Aku harus nyoba yang mana nih? Aku nyoba-nyoba banyak hal gitu lho. Memang RPP itu salah satunya membantu, kalau RPP nya bagus pasti nanti ini nya apa ya pembelajarannya itu juga kena, tapi pada akhirnya yang apa ya classroom management itu lah yang intinya yang paling penting dulu. Kalau classroom managementnya bagus, baru deh RPP bentuk apapun bisa. Classroom managementnya ga bagus…. yowes RPP bagusnya kayak apa ya ga bisa ga bisa jalan Berarti kalau kamu curhat ke senior, mereka lebih ngasih contoh apa yang mereka lakukan? He‟em mbak… mereka bilang “Kalau aku… Kalau aku enggak Ki, kalau misal ad anak kayak gitu, langsung stand in the corner!” dia bilang gitu. Nah kalau misalkan anaknya banyak mungkin kan kalau kelasnya dia khan mungkin beda, mbak. Misalkan khan karena dia gurunya orangnya galak, ooh… hanya satu anak nih yang berulah. Lha tapi kalau di kelasku banyak, khan ga mungkin kalau stand in the corner semua, khan ga mungkin. Kelasku tuh keadaannya gitu, hampir 5 anak tuh uuuhhh…… membuat kelas itu kacau gitu, sampai akhirnya itu menemukan cara-cara sendiri. Oohhh harusnya gini diitung dulu, kalau dihitung mereka ga duduk harusnya gimana… Terus apa ya, karena aku juga mengikuti training untuk classroom management, akhirnya aku juga tau kalau kita sebenernya harusnya ada kontrak dulu sama anak-anak, kalau anak-anak buat suatu kesalahan apa yang… , konsekuensi yang mereka harus lakukan kayak gitu jadinya aku juga belajar juga sih mbak. Berarti Kiki kalau denger strategi guru lain itu didengarkan terus difikirkan mana ya yang cocok sama Kiki, gitu? He‟em… jadi memang masih mikir-mikir aja, guru ini gini, guru ini gini…., kayak gitu dan apa ya dan yaudah memang ga ada cara lain selain aku sendiri yang menemukan gitu lho mbak. Yaudah mereka hanya menemukan masukan, ooh … ini ini ini mana ya enaknya gitu… Training yang diikuti Kiki itu apa namanya? Jadi training itu aku khan ikut training GLPDN itu tuh dari

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International Reading Association mbak, jadi itu tuh satu tahun. Jadi itu ada banyak sekali metode dan tehnik yang dipelajari untuk di kelas gitu, salah satunya classroom management itu, classroom management yang seharusnya kita dapatkan. Dan dia mengajarkan banyak sekali, kayak tehnik gimana anak-anak itu di kelas selalu di kelas itu tidak takut tapi masih order, kayak mereka mengetahui apa yang harus mereka lakukan, mereka tahu apa tujuan mereka belajar di pelajaran itu kayak gitu, ya salah satunya itu kamu harus membuat kontrak dengan anak-anak dulu sebelum kamu menentukan keputusan, misalkan dan itu biasanya di awal tahun pembelajaran khan… Bagaimana anak apa ya misalnya kalau anak melakukan kesalahan ini konsekuensi apa, kalau anak apa ya melakukan sesuatu yang bagus dia mendapatkan apa juga, yaa kayak reward and punishment itu lho mbak… Kamu ikut training itu tau dari kamu sendiri atau dari sekolah? Training itu jadi dari sekolah. Awalnya suratnya dari sekolah. Jadi itu kayak guru-guru di seluruh Salatiga gitu tu lho mbak … Gurunya memang di sekolah dipilihi, karena memang ada kuotanya. Kuotanya itu se-Salatiga 20 dan Bethany itu hanya dapat 4 guru, 4 slot itu untuk ikut training itu, dan itu satu tahun. Sekarang Kiki ngajar berapa kelas berarti? Awalnya aku ngajar kelas 2 kelas 3, tapi pararel. Jadi 4 kelas, sekarang juga 4 kelas. Karena Inggris itu satu minggu 6 jam mbak, jadi 4 kelas itu dah 24 jam, jadine memang ya ya gitulah. Mulai tahun ajaran baru itu kamu sudah menerapkan classroom management yang dari training itu? He‟em iya ya udah dari awal aku memang sudah harus punya cara sendiri gitu lho mbak, jadi cara-carane aku sudah harus…. Ohya jadi aku reflect dulu, dari kemaren masak aku ya mau kayak kemaren gitu. Bener-bener mbak berat banget, kalau pulang tuh mesthi wes capek, anaknya nakal, adminitrasinya segitu banyaknya. Khan dulu waktu dulu tuh mikirnya anakanaknya yang nakal karena mereka ga bisa diatur, tapi dari training yang aku ikuti ternyata bukan anaknya yang nakal, tapi there‟s only a bad teacher, bad students tuh ga ada … ya teachernya yang harus apa ya…. Maksudnya harus menggunakan apapun caranya biar anak itu bisa, gitu. Karena, anak-anak tetep aja, powernya ada di bawah kita gurunya gitu lho, tinggal kita caranya gimana. Berarti dulu Kiki menganggap sumber permasalahannya itu ada di anaknya? Iya… He‟e ini anaknya yang salah jadi anaknya yang nakal, anakanya yang ga mau dengerinlah… tapi setelah ikut training itu kayak diputar balikan sebenernya ga ada lho anak-anak yang bermasalah, yang ada itu karena kamu, persepsimu tentang anak-

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anak itu seperti itu, karena kamu apa ya menurutmu anak-anak itu nakal, cerewet, nah persepsi itulah yang membentuk mereka kayak gitu. Jadinya kalau apa ya kalau kamu mau mengganggap mereka sebagai partner juga pasti enak gitu lho mbak. Sekarang classroom management yang kamu terapkan dari semester baru ini apa aja? Itu aku saat mereka enggak duduk mereka harus C-O-C-O itu tadi coconut itu tadi. Kalau mereka ngomong pake Bahasa Indonesia di kelasku, itu mereka juga ada nyanyian gitu mbak, kayak banana milkshake gitu mbak, nyanyiannya. Itu kalau mereka ngomong pake Bahasa Indonesia lebih dari satu kata, karena mereka kalau mereka ga ngerti mereka masih pake quotation mark (memeragakan tanda kutik dengan kedua jari) aku masih ga papa. Tapi kalau sudah dalam bentuk kalimat mereka akan nyanyi banana milkshake itu. Tapi kalau mereka masih terus ngomong pake Bahasa Indonesia mereka akan pergi ke kantornya kurikulum dan mereka nyanyi itu juga dan mereka harus memeragakan dengan tariannya, dan mereka biasanya malu. Ya kalau terakhir paling parahnya, tapi ga pernah sih, ya mereka akan pergi ke kantornya Mr. Kukuh, kepala sekolahnya. Sekarang hasilnya sudah terlihat dengan classroom amanagement yang sudah diterapkan itu? Iya better, ya jauh… jauh lebih baik. Jadi anak-anak udah apa ya… udah bener-bener aware gitu lho, saat aku masuk ke kelas gitu mereka udah siap-siap gitu, langsung prepare themselves. Tadi Kiki cerita kalau kadang ada reflection itu berarti informal, hanya kaya mikir… Enggak tak tulis mbak, jadi cuman tiap kali pulang aku mikir, aku harus gimana ya…. Cuma kayak gitu. Dulu khan ada to kalau waktu kuliah disuruh buat reflection gitu-gitu khan, ga usah tak reflect gitu aku udah tak reflect sendiri aja…. Dari dalam diri kamu tuh ya ada rasa pengen tau kenapa gitu ya? Iya mbak dari dalam diriku sendiri. Pasti ada yang salah gitu lho mbak, kok tiap kali ngajar pasti kok kayak gitu, padahal kalau sama guru lain enggak. Khan kita bisa tau mbak kalau sama guru lain mereka bermasalah, kenapa kok di pelajaran Bahasa Inggris pasti bermasalah. Pasti khan ya udah yang salah ya itu tadi tidak lain tidak bukan khan pasti yang salah gurunya. Jadi gurunya yang harus mikir, harus diapain ya harus diapain ya gitu… Berarti waktu dulu kamu jadi assisstent kamu tinggal di kelas, terus kamu observe guru lain gitu? Enggak, aku enggak observe guru lain. Kalo jadi guru kelas itu cuman jagain kalau morning service, snack time, sama lunch time gitu lho mbak. Tapi kalau misalkan waktu guru lain ngajar khan kita lewat khan kita bisa tau, oohhh…. Kok sama sekali nggak ada suara kegaduhan yang diciptakan mereka waktu 128


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pelajaran Bahasa Inggris. Tiap guru baru pasti gitu mengalaminya mbak… Terus tadi Kiki cerita yang buat PROTA sama PROMES itu belajarnya dari contoh? Waktu itu ada coordinator kurikulumnya mbak, jadi kayak coordinator kurikulumnya itu menunjukan kalau PROTA itu kayak gini kalau PROMES itu kayak gini. PROTA itu semacam program tahunan yang isinya indicator terus materi pembelajaran sama alokasi waktu, kalau itu adalah gambarannya jadi adalah ya bisa gitu… kalau untuk PROMES pun ooohh…. Ya itu sama indicator, lalu alokasi waktu tapi lebih rinci gitu, maksudnya kelihatan gitu bisa tau, tapi itu ga pernah diajarkan. Lalu syllabus, bagaimana mengembangkan syllabus, itu khan juga ga pernah belajar kita. Yang kita tau dulu khan kalau mau ngajar itu syllabus udah ada kayak gini… Tapi bagaimana dari sesuatu yang ga ada…. Istilahnya kayak gini mbak… soalnya di Bethany itu khan eeee…. Bahasa Inggris itu khan perlu banget gitu ya… kaya… mmmm…. bener-bener harus ada tapi syllabus mau dikembangkan seperti apa tuh terserah gurunya. Nah aku tidak mempelajari bagaimana mengembangkan syllabus to what extent gitu lho itu bisa dikembangkan, istilahnya yasudah kalau ada syllabus kayak gini yaudah kita ikut aja, padahal kita punya kebebasan untuk tidak mengikuti syllabus yang dari pemerintah, karena kita swasta dan kita mulai Bahasa Inggris saja sudah mulai dari pre-school udah ada Bahasa Inggrisnya kayak gitu lho. Nah kayak gitu tu lho mbak yang dulu nggak dipelajari. Jadinya akhirnya belajar dari mana? Ya dari buku itu sendiri, terus akhirnya tanya sama coordinator kurikulumnya enaknya dibuat gimana. Dia khan juga dari FBS mbak, jadinya dia juga tau “Ooooo…. Kalau Bahasa Inggris, enaknya dibuat gini Miss…” Dan dia juga sudah S2 gitu lho jadi dia lebih tau “Ooooo enaknya dibuat gini dibuat gini.” Tapi ya akhirnya belajarnya ya kayak sendiri gitu lho… Ooooo dari kayak gini bisa dibuat kayak gitu ya… kayak gitu mbak…. Jadi coordinator kurikulum itu perannya dalam bantu Kiki gimana? Temen sharing aja atau mentor? Bukan mentor sih mbak tapi kayak sharing ke dia, enaknya dibuat gimana ya, ooohh enaknya kayak gini kayak gini jadi nanti serempak ya nanti kita ini, jadi lebih kayak guru-guru Bahasa Inggrisnya itu ya di … di … kumpulin jadi satu ini mau kita buat begini begini setuju atau enggak ya begitu Berarti di sekolah ada meeting subject teacher? He‟em…… Itu meetingnya rutin? Enggak, enggak rutin, itu cuman tergantung kalau ada masalah atau ada kebutuhan tertentu atau enggak, kalau kurrikulumnya 129


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oke-oke aja maksudnya kayak ooh… masih bagus kok, masih belum apa ya… tidak terlalu harus ada eee….. penambahan ataupun pengurangan, yaudah kita pake yang itu Kalau buat syllabus itu kamu liat dari contoh atau gimana? Kalau syllabus yang terakhir kemaren itu aku buat sendiri mbak, karena apa ya karena materinya ya memang udah tau PROTA PROMES nya sama pasti tapi dari silabusnya kita kembangin sendiri ya itu aku kembangin sendiri. Pas pertama kali ngajar masih inget ga ngajar apa? Topiknya? Tentang apa ya….. ini “How Do I Wear?” topiknya tentang itu, pokoke tentang ya pakaian apa musim apa untuk musim apa gitu Sukses nggak waktu itu? Enggak sukses, mbak waktu itu…!!! Kenapa? Jadi gini mbak… materinya itu tentang yaudah pakaian-pakain gitu khan… Aku berfikirnya, anak-anak itu belum tau … belum tau tentang itu, jadi aku hanya … akan … apa ya … istilahnya pertemuan pertama itu ya aku akan mengenalkan bentuknya dan nama pakainnya kayak gitu khan … tapi ternyata mereka sudah tau. Jadi kayak mereka sudah tau, yaudah… aku mikirnya kalau mereka sudah tau padahal harusnya belajar vocab dan itu di monthly schedule juga itu belajarnya vocab khan mbak, ya akhirnya aku tetep aku review tapi akhirnya anak-anak itu akan merasa bosan, memang jadinya yaudah mereka bosan “I have already known that!” Kayak mereka udah bener-bener nggak menikmati pelajaran itu khan, karena mereka sudah tau… kayak gitu. Dan waktu itu, karena mereka…. aku berfirikir mereka sudah tau, aku reviewnya cepet dan aku langsung moved ini… ke next material gitu khan. Materi itu juga tapi beda, tentang grammarnya atau apanya. Ternyata waktu kuis… mereka dapatnya jelek semua mbak… Padahal mereka waktu di ini bisa gitu lho…. Tapi pas aku buat kuis, nilainya tuh jelek semua, nilainya tuh 70 berapa dan itu banyak yang 70 berapa dan sebagian itu di bawah KKM. Jadinya aku berkali-kali aku buat kuis, buat monthly test hampir setengah kelas tuh pasti remidi mbak…. Jadi kayak… mereka itu sebenernya kayak kalau mereka bilang mengerti sebenernya mereka tuh belum mengerti. Jadi aku sekarang udah tau, kalau mereka bilang gitu, pasti mereka tuh belum mengerti. Jadi sekarang kayak aku bolak-balik pake pertanyaan lain atau aku buat exercisenya bentuk lain. Mereka tuh belum tau, hanya mereka memang sudah tau oohhh ini hanya kayak gini tok, tapi kalau aku suruh hubungin sama apa pasti belum tau. Misalkan mereka tau nih, itu jacket namanya jacket, tapi kalau dihubungin sama musim apa kamu bisa pake jacket atau waktu keadaan cuaca kayak apa kamu pake jacket dia ga ngerti, ya kayak gitu-kayak gitu mbak… Ohhh…. Aku baru

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ngerti toh setelah itu oohhhh kok nilainya jadi kayak gini. Waktu itu khan kalau setengah kelas remidi itu khan kegagalan guru to mbak …. Berarti learning outcomesnya khan ga kecapai sama sekali. Yaudah akhirnya aku mau ini, mau ngerti atau ga ngerti, meskipun ga ada pertanyaan sekalipun aku mengulang pertanyaan itu berkali-kali, aku pasti review dulu, aku reviewreview-review gitu. Kamu begitu tau hasil kuisnya itu separo lebih dapat jelek gitu terus gimana? Ya waktu itu aku cuman sharing aja sama guru-guru sama wali kelas “Miss, ini masih satu kelas, setengah kelas ini remidi.” Terus ada guru yang bilang “Berarti learning outcomes mu ga tercapai, seharusnya kamu ulang materi itu.” Nah waktu itu kalau mau ngulang materi itu enggak memungkinkan mbak, karena waktu itu … apa ya kepadatan jadwal yang sudah aku buat itu padat banget, jadi nggak mungkin diulang. Jadinya yaudah aku ngulangnya pas mereka mau mid-semester. Jadi aku ulang yang bagian itu yang mereka waktu itu gagal banyak banget itu aku ulang waktu jatah review di mid-semester itu. Aku review benerbener dari awal gitu mbak. Hasil kuis yang separo kelas dapat jelek itu di dibagikan ga? Iya mbak. Orang tua ada komentar ga? Komplain kok bisa separo kelas remidi? Enggak mbak, mereka nggak komen gimana-gimana. Mereka ya cuman mikir anaknya ga bisa gitu. Tapi aku merasa kok nilainya bener-bener ga ada yang dapat 90 tuh ga ada gitu lho mbak, 80 aja ga ada kok. Jadi kayak orang tua tuh mikire “Ooohhh anakku ki entuke elek.” Karena litanya satu tok, ga liat keseluruhan. Lha kalau aku khan liat secara keseluruhan dan sudah jelas-jelas antara banyak yang di bawah KKM gitu lho… Dan waktu itu memang permasalahannya waktu aku di … ngajar kelas 2 kelas 3 waktu tahun itu, itu tuh kita masih pakai kurrikulumnya My Pals itu tapi yang untuk local Singapore, jadi kayak yang biru ….. Ya sekarang kita pakenya yang International setelah ada evaluasi karena jaraknya, waktu aku ngajar kelas 3, materi kelas 3 itu dikuliahan aja mungkin ga bisa lho… yang di ini di IC itu mungkin ga bisa. Aku ngajar kelas 3 pas itu, nah itu khan ga mungkin pada saat nanti mereka SMP nya mau kayak gimana? Yang di dalam kelas 3 aja materinya udah kayak gitu. Makanya ada evaluasi dari seluruh sekolah bagaimana tentang materi Bahasa Inggris, makanya kita pake yang edisi International Edition. Masih dalam bentuknya sama tapi range nya ga terlalu tinggi. Itu evalusi waktu akhir tahun ajaran? Iya sama sekalian rapat kerja itu lho mbak, raker.

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Kiki ada pelajaran yang bisa diambil ga dari pengelaman ngajar pertama yang ga sukses itu? Iya yang materi ternyata anak-anak kalau kayak gitu dah tau, berarti aku kayak harus punya banyak apa ya mbak ya… kayak bank data atau bank apa ya, maksudnya kayak pembelajaran dari satu topik ini sudah bisa aku harus kayak apa gitu lho… nextnya, jangan terlalu terpaku sama RPP yang sudah dibuat, materinya kayak gini enggak gitu, bahkan kalau RPP ini nggak jalan kamu harus ada RPP RPP yang lain, istilahnya ada aktifitas-aktifitas lain di dalam kelas, jadi anak-anak tetep mendapatkan exsposure, dengan learning outcomes yang sama tapi caranya beda. Kayak gitu-kayak gitu sih. Berarti kalau yang dulu kamu masih nurut yang di buku begini… He‟em mbak… ooohhh kalau di buku gini, RPP nya gini, khan pikirnya RPPnya udah dibuat pasti aman nanti learning outcomesnya tercapai, ternyata enggak gitu lho… Dan dulu khan kita nggak diajarin mbak, saat RPP nya gini gimana…? Jadi situasi-situasi yang nggak terduga itu belum belajar mbak… Sekarang kamu juga kalau mau siapin materi pertimbangan muridmu seperti apa juga ya? Iya mbak, karakter anak, mood-nya, apakah mereka capek atau enggak, jam belajarnya di jam berapa, aku harus mikirin mbak, kalau sekarang aku buat RPP, aku dah tahu RPP ku dari satu kelas khan pararel mbak, ada Sparkling, ada Glowing, yang RPP aku buat dan aku terapkan di Sparkling itu bisa aja beda dengan yang di Glowing dengan learning outcomes yang sama. Karena yang glowing itu selalu di jam siang mbak, jam terakhir itu ga mungkin mbak pake RPP yang sama dengan Sparkling yang belajarnya di jam yang pagi yang masih fresh. Di jam terakhir itu anak-anak udah waaahh…, ga kooperatif, apalagi kita khan belajar sampai jam setengah 3 mbak. Kiki kerjanya 5 hari kerja? He‟em. Senin sampai Jumat. Jam kerjanya? Dari jam 7.00 – 7.30 itu aku briefing pagi mbak sama morning service. Trus jam 7.30 itu usher sampai jam 8.00. Usher untuk apa … untuk greet anak-anak. Jam 8.00 – 8.30 itu morning service untuk anak-anak sama wali kelas. Jadi mulai pembelajaran itu dari jam 8.30 – sampai jam 14.50. Terus Kiki masih ada office hour setelah itu? Nggak ada mbak, cuman sampai itu 15.15 kita pulang mbak, karena kita harus jagain anak-anak sampai mereka pulang. Lha terus itu kamu kerjain administrasinya in-between? Iya, berarti khan aku ngajar sehari 5-6 jam. Ada sekitar 3 jam yang aku harus ngerjain administrasi. Ya itu, apapun itu, RPP, soal, koreksi, apa-apa itu ya 3 jam itu, dan itu tidak 132


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memungkinkan. Pasti ada yang harus dibawa pulang ke rumah. Ga mungkin buat RPP selesai dalam waktu segitu, ya masih ada aktifitas-aktifitas ya natal, ya valentine, apa… apa… Kiki, koreksianmu banyak ya? Iya, worksheet, quiz ini sebulan sekali mbak. MOS sebulan sekali. Summary sebulan sekali. MOS itu apa? Monthly schedule lalu ada summary itu juga sebulan sekali. Khan tiap bulan kita buat summary untuk itu yang diberikan kepada orang tua. Monthly schedule itu seperti sebulan dia belajar apa aja, terus summarynya itu yang tentang materinya itu mbak. Kiki kalau assessment ada apa aja? Aku ada listening, speaking iya, sama itu tertulis itu jadi yang kognitif itu. Itu sudah peraturan dari sekolah begitu? Iya itu sudah aturannya sekolah. Jadi kalau Bahasa Inggris itu memang harus adakayak gitu nya. Tapi sebenernya ada kebebasan mbak untuk speaking itu mau dibuat kayak benerbener speaking test atau assessment secara keseluruhan gpp, khan assessment secara keseluruhan khan kelihatan oohh… anak ini gimana, cuman dari observasi gitu lho… nggak perlu ada bentuk tertulisnya speaking kayak gini kayak gini enggak. Kalau Kiki biasanya gimana? Aku speakingnya block waktu sendiri mbak, misalnya kayak role-play Keluarga di rumah tau nggak tiap kamu pulang kerjaanmu banyak gitu? Terus tanggapan mereka gimana? Mesthi gini kerjaane akeh pulangnya sore dan itu masih lembur, kayak gitu khan kok nganu ga ada liburnya, pasti bilang gitu. Apalagi kayak kemaren akreditasi itu mbak, Sabtu khan juga masuk. Jadi yaudah to, kalau aku, aku ga akan mengeluh. Kalau aku nggak mengeluh di depan Bapak Ibu, pasti mereka yaudah pasti mereka ga akan bermasalah. Tapi pasti saat aku mengeluh kayak tahun-tahun awal aku mengeluh, yaudah mereka khan pasti mikirnya kenapa nggak nganu, kerja di tempat lain aja kayak gitu. Awalnya gitu, karena aku selalu mengeluh. Kalau aku pulang aku selalu mengeluh, pulang mengeluh. Tapi lamalama itu bukan lagi mengeluh, biasa diatasi kok asal yaitu management aku sendirinya ya bagus pasti ga mengeluh. Berarti dalam diri kamu ada keyakinan kalau aku tuh bisa menghadapi ini? Iya … Aku selalu mikir kalau aku tuh pasti bisa cuman kadang waktu awal-awal itu khan anak-anaknya udah pada ga bisa dihandle. Aku ga bisa nih sama anak-anakanya. Tapi ternyata kalau anak-anaknya itu menyenangkan ngajar itu pasti 133


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menyenangkan gitu lho mbak tiap kali masuk itu menyengankan. Tapi kalau kita ga bisa memange anaknya, anak-anaknya bikin ulah, keluar kelas tuh nanti pasti wes males mau ngerjain administrasi apa-apa gitu Keluarga support gimana? Bantuin Kiki apa gitu… ? Nggak, mbak. Ya doain aja mbak. Kalau situasi di tempat kerja gimana? Lingkungan kerja itu enak mbak, karena temen-temennya tidak ada usianya yang jaraknya terlalu tua, kecuali kepala sekolahnya. Jadi kayak apa ya enak aja, apalagi banyak yang anak-anak FBS. Jadi enak khan ngasih supportnya, suka bercanda gitu-gitu jadi enak mbak. Hubungan Kiki dengan kepala sekolah gimana? Iya di awal itu support mbak, kepala sekolahnya itu dulunya itu gini, ga tau ya… karena misalkan aku peganggnya Bahasa Inggris, semua kegiatan Bahasa Inggris jadinya ke aku, kayak misalkan extra curricular, jadinya kayaknya aku… Tapi akhirnya aku dibilangin “Ki, kamu jangan jadi kayak yes-person.” Jadi kalau misalkan dikasih kerjaan ini ya, ini iya. Akhirnya aku sebagain aku tolak, jadi kayak jadi guru untuk English Club aku tolak mbak. Kalau buat aktifitas di kelas pasti jalan? Atau pernah ada pengalaman yang ga sukses dengan aktifitasnya? Pernah… Kenapa kok bisa gitu? Ya itu, karena ada anak yang misalkan game gitu ya, anaknya itu marah karena dia kalah atau karena dia belum kalah tapi scorenya udah dibawah temennya itu ga mau, “I don‟t join!” kalau dia udah ngomong gitu, wah udah… mbak… Dulu kalau ada anak yang kayak gitu, aku ga berani mbak … Saat anak bilang “I don‟t join!” aku ndak memiliki apa ya… kata-kata lain untuk gimana-gimana. Kalau sekarang aku kalau ada anak yang bilang “I don‟t join!” yaudah tak bilang aja kalau I don‟t join sekalian aja nggak usah join kelas sekalian. Tak gituin aja. Sekarang aku kayak gitu mbak. Tapi kalau dulu aku kayak takut gitu lho mbak. Nanti kalau anaknya marah gimana. Dulu tuh masih yang “Ayo to ikut… gpp…” kalau sekarang yaudah lebih tegas aja, kalau misalkan anak ini udah dari awal kita ada aktifitas yang kayak gitu kalau ga ini harus gimana. Sekarang udah terbiasa gitu lho mbak, kalau mereka melanggar ada consequences nya apa… Berarti sekarang jauh lebih settled ya? Iya aku udah bilang di awal procedure ku untuk belajar Bahasa Inggris aturannya apa aja. Jadi sekarang kalau aku masuk kelas mereka langsung switch ke English khan sebelumnya pelajarannya bukan Bahasa Inggris. Mereka sekarang udah 134


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automatically switch ke Bahasa Inggris, karena mereka sudah tau apa consequencesnya kalau ga pakai Bahasa Inggris. Kiki dulu pas awal ngajar kalau angajar tipenya kayak gimana sih? Aku masuk kelas, aku suka ngajar pake pictures, apa gambar sendiri apa ngeprint pake pake AVA gitu mbak.Ya cukup effective sih anak-anak cukup tertarik, tapi lama-kelamaan khan itu memakan waktu mbak, makanya sekarang aku berubah ke LCD, video, aku udah ga lagi kayak yang dulu karena sekali pake aja yang dulu kalau gambar. Kiki kalau ngajar urutannya sama kayak di My Pals? Mulai dengan reading dulu trs baru apa gitu? Oh kalau topik sama nurut My Pals tapi aku ga selalu reading dulu. Ga pasti reading dulu, aku ide sendiri mbak. Pertimbangannya apa? Susah atau enggaknya materinya mbak, kalau readingnya susah yang nggak aku pakai. Misalkan belajar food and drink trs ada poemnya yang menjijikan itu lho mbak, yang nenek-nenek masak masukin kaos kaki itu lho mbak, aku ga pakai Kenapa? Soalanya mereka itu orang tuanya sensitive. Makanya menurutku itu ga mendidik terus aku ga masukin aja, 135ang a begitu member support untuk tema utama. Kalau readingnya ga bagus, ya aku cari yang sesuai atau aku buat sendiri yang sesuai Pernah ada masalah sama parents ga? Dulu pernah itu waktu My Pals nya masih susah. Ada yang datang kalau anak-anak kesusahan. Mereka bilang “Miss Kiki ini khan ga mungkin anak-anak mengerti seperti ini” Tapi aku ga ada jawaban lain ya selain memang materinya itu memang bukunya itu dan itu keputusan dari sekolah seperti itu. Tapi aku mencoba untuk menyederhanakan materi itu, jadi itu masih pakai My Pals yang dulu mbak, readingnya susah-susah mbak. Karena aku meminimalisasi biar ga ada lagi complain seperti itu, agar anak-anak mengerti. Tapi jatuh-jatuhnya tetep ada yang ga mengerti ya karena memang buku itu susah mbak. Kiki sampaikan ga masalah ini ke guru lain? Ya aku cerita ke guru-guru lalu aku certain ke kurikulum dan ke kepala sekolah, karena itu tanggung jawab mereka. Karena mereka yang set kurikulum seperti itu, jadi kalau ada complain apa-apa pasti yang kena khan gurunya. Ya akhirnya diganti itu mbak. Di sekolah ada guru coordinator subject ga sih? Ga ada mbak, ya itu cuman kurikulum untuk semuanya dia yang koreksi semua kayak PROTA, PROMES, silbus, soal, MOS, summary dia semuanya… Tapi dia bukan mentor ya? Cuman sharing aja? 135


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Iya jadi dia lebih kayak sharing enaknya gimana ya. Nanti dia kasih saran enaknya dibuat gini gini….

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Interview Transcript 4 Day and date : Wednesday, February 19, 2014 Time : 06.00 a.m. – 06.30 a.m. The interview was done through chatting on WhatsApp A : Adesia K : Kiki Interview 4 A1 K1

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Text Kiki, khan dulu cerita sebelum kerja di Bethany, sempat nglamar kerja di perusahaan. Itu apa aja ya? Udah sampai tahap apa? Perusahaan Penata Future di Semarang udah sampai interview dan diterima, tapi aku nggak ambil mbak… Terus Daniel Creative School Semarang, aku ditolak karena alasan agama. Terus sempat juga ikut psikotes di perusahaan batik di Solo. Yang di Penata Future kok nggak diambil kenapa dek? Karena perusahaannya nggak beres mbak… nggak nggenah gitu dan aku cuman coba-coba. Sekarang Kiki ngajar subject English kelas berapa aja? Ngajar kelas 3 dan 4 pararel. Selain jadi guru subject ada tugas lain ga? Wali kelas atau PIC apa? Kalau tahun lalu? Sekarang aku wali kelas 4 tahun lalu assistant wali kelas 2. Aku juga coordinator pengembangan Bahasa Inggris beberapa guru.

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Interview Transcript 5 Day and date : Wednesday, February 23, 2014 Time : 07.00 p.m. – 08.30 p.m. The interview was done through chatting on WhatsApp A : Adesia K : Kiki

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Text Kiki di Salatiga tinggal dengan siapa saja? Bapak sama ibu, mbak. Terus kakak? Sudah berkeluarga mbak, jadi rumah sendiri. Pekerjaan orang tua apa ya? Bapak kerja di DLLAJR, kalau ibu jual snack-snack gitu mbak. Setelah lulus kuliah pernah kerja part-time nggak? Misalkan ngelesi? Dulu ngelesi di Global Vision, mbak. Aku ngajar sekitar 5-10 anak. Kelas berapa murid-muridnya? Kelas 2 dan 4 Kiki, aku mau confirmasi ya dek pas interview kemaren kan Kiki cerita kalau jadi guru itu bukan cita-cita utama karena orang menyepelekan profesi itu, tapi sekarang setelah kerja jadi tau dan sadar kalau guru itu kerjaannya banyak dan pekerjaannya bukanlah hal yang sepele. Bener ga dek? Iya mbak, dan aku bangga bisa jadi guru yang melakukan pekerjaan yang semestinya. Kiki, dulu waktu proses nglamar kerja ke Bethany ada micro teaching dulu nggak? Apa langsung dikasih tau diterima atau enggak? Ada mbak. Waktu itu aku disuruh ngajar tentang road safety kelas 3. Terus habis selesai ngajar, aku cuman dikasih tau kalau bagus gitu. Terus habis itu baru dihubungi diterima atau enggak? Terus dijelaskan ngajar kelas berapa dan tugas-tugasnya apa aja? Hu‟um mbak. Waktu itu aku ikut training seminggu untuk materi pembelajaran math and science sama administrasi. Tugas-tugas administrasi guru apa aja? Tugas-tugas guru itu, PROTA, PROMES, lesson plan, monthly schedule, summary, analisis ulangan bulanan, kisi-kisi, soal-soal. Di tahun pertama kerja sudah jadi coordinator pengembangan

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Bahasa Inggris? Itu tugasnya apa ya dek? Dari pertengahan tahun pertama mbak. Itu tugasnya ngatur jadwal guru yang ngajar Bahasa Inggris sama jadi trainer Bahasa Inggris untuk guru-guru lainnya. Kiki pas tahun pertama khan ada kesulitan dengan pembuatan silabus, terus akhirnya gimana buatnya? Tahun pertama aku sama ngikut My Pals gitu mbak… tahun ini baru buat sendiri. Di tahun pertama ada problem ga dengan L1 dan L2 di kelas? Anak-anak suka ngomong pake Bahasa Indonesia mbak, tapi aku tetap jawab pake Bahasa Inggirs Karena mereka suka ngomong pake Bahasa Indonesia itu buat kelas jadi rame ga sih? Maksudku mereka jadi suka ngomong sama temannya, khan bebas tuh mereka suka pake Bahasa Indonesia? Sebelum kamu terapkan classroom management itu? Mereka emang rame mbak. … kadang ramenya bukan karena ngobrol tapi banyak tanya terus sahut-sahutan gitu Ooohhh jadi ibaratnya lalu-lintas komunikasi di kelas itu in chaos? Iyaa…. Terus kamu apply classroom management mu itu, terus mereka udah ga rame lagi? Sudah enggak mbak, rebut pun terkontrol dan focus. Startegy classroom management apa yang mbok aplikasikan untuk hal ini? Aku Cuma strict aja mbak… kalo rebut ya stand in the corner … Eh, GLDPN itu kepanjangan dari apa sih? GLDPN itu global literacy professional development network. Dari training itu selain classroom management kamu dapat ilmu baru apa lagi dek? Diagnose teaching methods mbak … Banyak banget method baru yang aku pelajari. Kiki mulai menerapkan diagnose teaching method itu di tahun ajaran baru ini? Dari tahun sebelumnya pertengahan udah aku coba beberapa method yang aku pelajari. Ohhh yayaya…, kalo kamu terapkan method itu jadi lebih baiknya gimana? Yang jelas materi kayak reading gitu jadi lebih menyenangkan karena metode nya lebih variatif dan fun. Lebih bisa menarik perhatian anak buat belajar ya? Hu‟um mbak karena ga monoton methodnya. Kiki dulu khan pas baru mulai kerja rasanya berat sampai ada rasa pengen resign, tapi itu pas di awal-awal aja khan? Apa sih yang membuatmu bisa melewati itu dan bertahan sampai

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sekarang? Iya mbak, di awal itu rasanya berat, serasa pengen resign … tapi ga bener-bener pengen sih… Aku sampai sekarang masih bertahan karena aku suka ngajar mbak, aku juga suka teman dan suasanya kerjanya. Eh sebagai novice teacher dengan semua yang sudah kamu lewati, Kiki ada harapan apa ga? Harapan misalnya ada training lagi ada support yang membantu mu to perform better? Atau mungkin berharap ada kenaikan salary hehehehe….. Kalau gaji pasti pengen ditambah mbak …. Pengen aja dari yayasan memberikan beasiswa buat sekolah lagi … atau mungkin training yang berkelanjutan kayak GLDPN Kiki, mulai ikut training GLDPN itu mulai kapan ya? Sampai kapan? Mulai satu tahun yang lalu mbak… lupa aku kapan? Itu biaya dari sekolah? Iya aku enggak bayar. Terus itu dipilih dari sekolah? Iya dipilih dari sekolah Kiki kalau sama anak-anak berarti udah ada kayak rasa sayang ikatan gitu ya? Iya mbak apalagi anak-anaknya lucu-lucu jadi itu juga yang membuat aku tetep ngajar. Ada cerita nggak yang misal Kiki nggak masuk kerja terus anakanak kangen nyariin Kiki? Ada mbak. Pernah waktu itu aku nggak masuk seminggu … terus mereka buat ucapan selamat datang dan kasih aku surat gitu mbak.

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APPENDIX 3 Jalu’s Interview Transcripts Interview Transcript 1 Day and date : Saturday, February 1, 2014 Time : 10.23 a.m. – 12.47 p.m. The interview was done through chatting on Facebook A : Adesia J : Jalu Interview 1 A1

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Text Jalu, aku mulai pertanyaan yangawal2 dulu ya... Kamu dulu dari SMA lulus memang niatnya masuk UKSW FBS? Trus lulus FBS juga memang pengen jadi guru? Khan banyak tuh anak-anak FBS yang lulus ga pengen jadi guru... Lulus SMA dulu memang FBS pilihan utamanya… kalau jadi guru sih bukan pilihan pertama (meskipun S.Pd.) bukan karena gak suka jadi guru, tapi pengen coba kerja yang lain... tapi dari sekian banyak proses seleksi kerja kemaren yang bisa lolos sampe diterima ya yang jadi guru ini... Sebenernya pengennya jadi apa? Trs, sebelum akhirnya kerja di Bethany daftar apa aja? Kalau yang sbenar-benarnya sih akhir2 kuliah punya visi jadi dosen tapi begitu lulus pengen coba kerja kantoran sempat daftar di beberapa perusahaan dan lolos beberapa tahap tapi gak lanjut... Perusahaannya bergerak di bidang apa? Ada yang di bidang makanan, ada yang di bidang kosmetik Jadi dosen berarti dosen FBS gitu? Ngajar English? Ya entah di FBS atau dmana aja, yang jelas ngajar English.. Ohh gitu... Alasanya memutuskan untuk terima kerjaan jadi guru apa? Soalnya gini mbak… aku juga suka mengajar, mumpung ada kesempatan bekerja di depan mata dan itu jadi guru, ya tak ambil… yang kedua... aku juga gak mau kalo seandainya udah lulus lama tapi belum punya pengalaman kerja seandainya harus cari kerja lagi Terus kalau ngajar memang suka ngajar di SD? Atau sebenernya pengennya ngajar di kelas yang lebih besar (usianya) atau kelas kecil? Waktu nglamar di Bethany aku masukin buat SMP... tapi waktu 141


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dipanggil memang yang kosong SD aku ambil aja sebagai tantangan baru karena pengalaman PPL dulu memang ngajar SMP dan SD belum pernah sama sekali kalo kelas yang lebih kecil dari SD (TK) malah pernah Sekarang ini kamu ngajar kelas berapa? Ngajar kelas 2, 3, sama 4 mbak Kamu dulu milih sendiri mau kelas itu atau ditawari dulu atau ya langsung dikasih kelas itu? Langsung dikasih... karena yang kosong ya kelas itu Kamu guru subject aja? Apa ada jabatan lain? Kayak home room atau asistent? English sama Christian Education kalo jabatan lain sementara ini belum ada Pas pertama kali kamu mulai kerja gimana rasanya? Excited, nervous apa piye? Nervous… karena belum pernah ada pengalaman ngajar anak SD yang pemahamannya belum seperti anak SMP Pas pertama masuk kelas gitu piye ceritane? Ya cukup rame... aku berusaha biar pelajarannya semenarik mungkin aja buat anak-anak Kamu ada kesulitan ga pas menghadapi mereka? Anaknya rame gitu kamu piye? Ya itu dia kesulian utama untuk anak SD mereka masih sering rame sendiri tapi ya kalau rame ada beberapa cara yang tak pake bisa tak diemin dulu sampe sadar sendiri (buat kelas yang sudah agak gede), bisa tak peringatkan secara halus ataupun tegas, bisa tak ajak maen games juga… tergantung kondisi dan sebab mereka rame mbak… Pas menghadapi anak-anak yang rame gitu stress ga? Pernah juga sih, tapi gak sampe stress trus gak ngapa2in… aku tetep cari cara saat itu juga biar anak2nya gak rame lagi

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Interview Transcript 2 Day and date : Monday, February 17, 2014 Time : 04.50 a.m. – 06.00 p.m. Location : Jalu‟s house Jl. Nakula Sadewa, Taman Kembang Arum, Salatiga. A : Adesia J : Jalu Interview 2 A1 J1 A2 J2 A3 J3 A4 J4

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Text Mulai dari nama lengkap ya… Nama lengkapnya? Febriyant Jalu Prakosa Tanggal lahir? 28 Februari 1992 Dari kecil di Salatiga? Asli Salatiga? Iya…. Jalu, lulus kuliah langsung kerja di Bethany? Apa sempat kerja atau lamar kerja di tempat lain? Sebelumnya sempat kerja juga, jadi khan Juli 2013 itu lulus diwisuda it terus dari Juli sampai September awal itu cari-cari kerja terus pertengahan September itu dapat kerja di itu di sana di Salatiga Lab, tapi aku ambilnya part time dulu khan ditawari full timer tapi aku tetep ambilnya part time soale mau cari kerja di sekolah formal entah di Salatiga pokoknya di Jawa Tengah lah. Nah itu juga sempat sambil volunteer di SWCC itu… Di Salatiga Lab, ngajar? Ngajar English juga mbak… Usianya? Usia variatif sih mbak, ada yang paling muda itu kelas SMA, terus kuliah itu untuk yang specific purpose, mereka ada yang mau S2 juga, gitu khan English buat yang mau nerusin itu juga, terus TOEFL. Pernah juga ngajar Kasatlantas. Tapi Kasatlantas nya masih muda sih mbak … masih umur 30. Terus yang di SWCC itu? Itu ngajar anak-anak TK mbak. Ngajar apa? Cuman jadi assistant teacher sih. Jadi assistant nya Ms. Sus sama Ms. Andri. Mulai kerja di Bethany kapan? Itu bulan Oktober tanggal 21 Berarti itu malah enggak pas tahun ajaran baru ya? Endak mbak. Jadi itu ceritanya aku sudah nglamar di beberapa tempat yang tanggal, eemm … bulan Agustus itu aku masukan di

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2 tempat, di Kievid sini sebenernya, itu khan nggak … nggak apa teaching to… nggak tentang education, terus sama di Bethany. Pertamanya dua-duanya dipanggil tapi Kievid dulu, Kievid udah lolos-lolos tapi nggak ada kabar lagi, sementara aku dah masuk ke Bethany gitu. Berarti sekarang Jalu udah berapa bulan ngajar di Bethany? Mm….. ya 4bulanan lah mbak…. Berarti udah lewat satu semester ya. Pas di awal itu ada observasi dulu atau orientasi tentang sekolahnya ga? Kalau dikenalin sih… Bentar tak ingat-ingat dulu mbak. Soalnya aku lebih kayak eee… waktu yang pertama datang itu khan aku kayak interview khan, yaudah interview aja, terus kalau sudah lolos nanti baru dikasih tau kapan praktek ngajar… micro teaching gitu terus ya setelah itu micro teaching itu tanpa diperkenalkan tanpa observe. Jadi langsung dek…. Kayak gini nih anak-anaknya, jadi aku ga tau anaknya seperti apa, perilakunya sperti apa. Dan aku ga tau approach nya harus gimana. Yaudah aku siap dengan materi yang mereka berikan aku buat lesson plan ku sendiri, belajar, terus praktek ngajar. Eksekusinya langsung. Yaa… lancar sih waktu itu. Masih ingat ga waktu itu ngajar apa? Ngajar English buat kelas 2 sama kelas 3. Waktu itu disamaain sih mbak, memang bukan materinya mereka tapi aku disuruh ngajar tentang itu, tentang World of Plants, jadi tentang tanaman. Setelah diterima dikasih tau nggak job descriptionnya apa, tanggung jawab administrasi dan sebagainya? He‟e… iya itu di hari dimana aku dikasih tau aku diterima, ada janjian waktu itu sama Waka Kurikulumnya, beliau bilang nanti kamu gini… gini... gini… ini yang dikerjakan membuat misalkan ada yang namanya daftar nilai, analisis nilai test, terus kayak rapor checklist yang per-anak, per-mata pelajarannya gitu. Kayak syllabus itu pasti, RPP, terus PROMES, PROTA. Itu kamu diajari apa cuman dikasih contoh terus disuruh belajar sendiri? Eee... karena keterbatasan waktu. Waktu itu khan bener-bener butuh guru, guru yang untuk masuk langsung kerja itu. Aku nggak diajari mbak. Jadi cuman dikasih tau job des nya itu terus ya udah aku learning by doing. Hehehe….. Terus kamu pinjem dari guru lain biar tau kayak apa sih contohnya. Apa kamu dikasih ini lho contohnya begini? Eee…. Untungnya begini mbak, pengarsipannya di Bethany itu kebetulan agak… agak lebih baik mbak. Soalnya beberapa dari guru bahkan guru yang tak gantiin ini, itu ada arsipnya. Terus aku nyonto yang punya dia terus tak buat-buat sendiri. Kaget ga harus bikin kayak gitu? Ya sebetulnya pertamanya sih bener kaget. Waahh ternyata 144


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banyak ya…. Dulu ketoke kalau di sekolah-kolah lain ga sampai kayak gini sih …. Gitu. Dipikir-pikir lagi ternyata jadi guru itu nggak segampang yang kita pikirin, ga cuman tinggal ngajar ternyata masih banyak tanggung jawab yang lain, tapi asyik sih ... pertama memang shock cuman. Pertama kali waktu buat PROTA, PROMES, syllabus ada yang ga ngerti ga? Maksudnya ternyata yang aku pelajari waktu kuliah itu ada yang kurang untuk membantu aku buat ini. Kalau yang PROTA, PROMES ga terlalu bermasalah soalnya tanya cara buatnya gimana terus bisa buat sendiri dan contohnya ada. Tapi kalau syllabus sampe sekarang sih masih bingung, hehehehe Masih bingung mbak… Yang kalau PROTA, PROMES memang ga belajar waktu kuliah tapi itu sudah ada banyangannya karena ternyata simple kok kayak buat plan pembagian jam mata pelajaran sama per materinya per KD sama per SK nya… ya akhirnya mudeng sih. Cuma kalau silabus khan ee…. Kemaren aku copy-paste, jadi dari yang tahun lalu tak ganti tahunnya aja. Kemarin kalau Mbak Kiki cerita dia itu taunya kalau silabus itu sudah ada ternyata eh harus buat sendiri. Dan dia bingung harus mengembangkannya seperti apa dan bagaimana. Kamu sama ga? Merasa bingung juga? Iya mbak sama mbak sama itu. Jadi gini mbak, tak ceritani ya. Aku khan ngajarnya dua English sama CE (Christian Education). Nah kalau CE ini ada bukunya, ada buku panduannya to… terus di buku panduannya itu ada PROTA, PROMES, silabus itu bahkan ada. Jadi aku kayak… apa ya aku ketik ulang aja biarpun agak konyol gitu, kayak merasa nggak berguna po piye terus wess… tak ketik ulang wae. Cuman kalau Bahasa Inggris mesthi mikir soalnya khan cuman dikasih tau bukunya My Pals. Jadi khan kita cuman dikasih tau kompetensinya apa aja terus kita khan harus bikin, terus aku mikir ini sesuai nggak ya sama standard kompetensi yang dikasih pemerintah. Terus yoweslah teko mbikin aja. Setelah itu kamu serahkan ke kurikulum, ada feedback nggak? Mmm…. sementara ini belum mbak, karena kemarin itu aku membuat silabus, PROTA, PROMES itu demi keperluan akreditasi mbak. Nah, karena untuk itu makanya administrasi harus ada dulu, dikejar dulu. Katanya buat Bahasa Inggris harus semeyakinkan mungkin dan harus berdasarkan buku… yaudah aku buatnya gitu, tak kebut. Waktu proses buat PROTA, PROMES, syllabus, Jalu tanyatanya ga ke temen atau ke kurikulum, atau yaudah selesain sendiri aja? Aku ya tanya nya ya sama…. Sempat sih nanyanya ya sama mbak Kiki juga itu to… Kebanyakan ya tanyanya sama Waka

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Kurikulumnya itu, soalnya khan beliau juga ngajar English, jadi mending langsung tanya sama beliau aja. Pas tanya, terus dapatnya apa? Saran gitu? Iya, selalu kasih saran. Sekarang ini, Jalu ngajar kelas berapa aja? Kelas 2, 3, 4. Yang ngajar Bahasa Inggris kelas? Kelas 2 aja. Berarti total ngajar Bahasa Inggrisnya berapa jam? English itu berarti 12 jam. Jalu berarti di sekolah jadi guru subject aja. Ngajar subject English sama CE sama kerjain administrasinya? Itu sama swimming mbak. Jadi aku bukan coach, karena ga bisa renang. Ya renang bisa sih, tapi ga bisa ngajar gitu. Cuman jadi kayak PIC nya di sekolah, mereka khan renangnya di Laras Asri. Jadi, aku PIC nya aja yang di sekolah`. Jam kerjanya Jalu, bisa diceritain ga? Mulai kerja jam 7 mbak, morning service guru sama briefing sampe jam 7.30. Terus nanti kalau piket usher, ya salaman itu sampai jam 8. Masuk kelas, morning service murid dipimpin home room teacher, terus nanti 8.30 baru mulai pelajaran. Sekarang Jalu udah jadi home room? Belum mbak. Waktu pertama kali ngajar yang pas udah diterima. Masih ingat nggak ngajar apa? Tentang apa? Itu materinya “A Day at the Zoo” Jadi itu tentang animals, ada beberapa tentang grammatical functions yang dimasukin di situ juga, kayak ee…. Present continuous terus itu has/ have ya kayak gitu lah… Sukses nggak? Sukses sih, cuman waktu pertama masuk itu mbak, bukan ngajar. Aku disuruh ngasih kuis. Jadi aku yang buat kuis berdasarkan apa yang sudah diajarkan sama guru yang lalu. Itu yang benerbener pertama sih mbak. Jadi aku bukan langsung ngajar tapi bikin kuis. Ya agak kerepotan sih. Sempat ada beberapa orang tua yang protest juga. Kenapa protest? Karena… “Lhoh Mr ini gambarnya kurang jelas...” atau gimana terus tak jelasin juga to karena aku cuman ngikutin polanya dari teacher yang sebelumnya juga to. Tapi terus akhirnya aku dari situ aku memperbaiki lagi, model aku membuat kuis itu seperti apa, akhirnya aku bisa punya kayak semacam template ku sendiri. Kalau yang bener-bener ngajar materimu sendiri yang nggak melanjutkan dari guru sebelumnya?

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Mmmm… “A Day at the Zoo” itu melanjutkan jadi guru yang sebelumnya itu kemarin sampai setengahnya, jadi aku tinggal melanjutkan aja dan review lagi terus test yang bulanan itu. Pas buat test susah ga? Ga sih soalnya udah sempat kuis itu terus ada kayak pebendaharaan soal juga dari guru sebelumnya terus tinggal aku bikin gitu. Kalau dengan anak-anak kelas 2 ada masalah ga sama anak-anak yang rame? Sampai sekarang sih masih ya mbak. Kadang-kadang ada masalah ya mbak, soalnya mereka itu gini, aku seringnya dapat jam pelajaran English itu setelah lunch atau menjelang lunch. Jadi itu mereka pas ngantuk-ngantuknya atau pas rame-ramenya. Jadi khan beda kalau misalkan pagi itu… Pagi, ngajar mereka pagi itu cuman Kamis dan Jumat dan itu pasti beda banget mbak. Kalau Kamis sama Jumat itu pasti mereka diem, dengerin, terus aktif. Afktinya tapi bukan rame, tapi terus involve gitu khan terus mereka bener-bener pay attention. Cuman kalau misalnya masalahnya kalau menurutku tuh cuman karena dasarnya jamnya ya memang jam-jam yang kurang mendukung untuk pembelajaran sama khan butuh istirahat ya kali ya mbak ya… Mereka khan masih kecil, kelas 2 disuruh pulang sampai jam 3 itu capek. Chaotic mbak jadinya. Ohya… chaoticnya gimana? Kiki cerita ada anak yang pegangin kakinya terus jilat-jilat kayak anjing. Kalau kamu gimana? Iya sama, aku ya pernah mbak kayak gitu. Cuman ga sering sih mbak, cuman 1 atau 2 kali itu ada anak yang kayak gitu dan kebetulan ada anak di kelasku yang gini… emmm… Ada 2 kelas to mbak, yang Sparkling sama Glowing, yang entah pembagiannya kayak gimana pembagiannya aku belum tau gimana mbak. Cuman kecenderungannya tuh gini, cuman yang di Sparkling ini kebanyakan yang bright brighter gitu lho yang nilainya cenderung standardnya lebih bagus tapi lebih ramai juga gitu dan di kelas Sparkling ini ada satu biang keroknya terus satu yang susah diatur karena dia kemampuannya berkomunikasi, berbahasanya itu masih kurang akhirnya dia susah diatur terus dia males. Jadi 2 anak ini yang jadi apa ya, yang kayak membuat kalau komplikasinya gitu. Jadi apa ya… Kalau yang satu provokator, kalau aku ngurusi anak yang ini belum kelar yang ini jadi tambah ramai tak tinggal jadi parah. Ada ga masalah dengan anak ini yang jadi pengalaman tak terlupakan? Apa ya…? Ee… pernah belum belum lama sih. Bisanya oke oke aja sih terus bilangin oke manut. Cuman kemaren itu sempat bulan lalu, dia ambil remote LCD terus dikasih di sakunya terus dia tak

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ambil lagi itu nggak mau, akhirnya terganggu khan pelajarannya terus kacau, temen-temennya juga ya makin ramai karena aku sempat ninggal mereka karena ngurusin anak itu tadi buat minta remote LCD nya dan dia ga kasih, akhirnya dia ya tak tinggal aja. Aku ngurusin temen-temennya aja, terus ya sempet agak lama, berapa menitan ya itu, kira-kira ada 10 menitan. 10 menitan itu ya sempat bolak-balik dari dia ke temen-temenya, dia ke temen-temenya. Berarti kalau ada masalah gitu seketika kamu selesaikan dengan anak itu, terus yang lain ditinggal dulu? Iya mbak selesaikan langsung dengan anak itu. Menurutku gitu sih mbak, daripada kayak membuat si ini wah… Kalau dia dibiarin ramen anti yang lain protes kok itu boleh rame terus. Nah nanti kalau udah rame baru semuanya. Aku terus bisanya pake itu namanya “lomba diam”. Lomba diam itu gimana? Ee…. Aku bilang, kalau misalkan pas rame ya pas rame… terus aku bawa hasil test mereka terus aku bilang “Oke, I have your test result. Do you want it?” “Yes, Mr… “ wa…wa…wa gitu to mbak terus rame khan… aku bilang kalau yang paling tenang paling diem, itu nanti yang paling dapat duluan, itu yang paling manjur kalau di kelas 2. Habis itu sampai pelajaran selesai juga aman terkendali? Hemmmm… enggak, soalnya kalau aku dulu pernah dibilanginm entah itu theory-theory dari siapa tapi kayaknya bener-bener terbukti. Eee… konsentrasinya seorang anak itu umurnya ditambah 3, itu jumlah menit konsentrasi anak, gitu… Nah, dan kayaknya memang terbukti mbak, jadi aku suruh mereka diem gitu cuma bertahan beberapa menit, terus aku jadi harus ada semacam hook lagi untuk menarik mereka lagi ke pelajaran dan itu sing waahhh…. Luar biasa susahnya cari kayak games, ice breaker dan sebagainya. Kalau mereka ga suka ya mereka benerbener ga suka. Pernah ga mereka ga suka sama aktifitas mu itu? Pernah, itu pertama-tama tapi. Akhir-akhir ini udah enggak. Waktu pertama itu gimana? Waktu pertama itu aku belum sempat punya games yang banyak gitu belum khan. Aku cuman punya games terbatas dan sempat kehabisan akal terus mereka ini lagi ini lagi “Boring!” sempet ada yang teriak seperti itu. Terus aku aduh terus aku ya gimana ya… akhirnya ya tak jalani aja. Terus tak cari-cari anak-anak yang seperti ini itu sukanya yang seperti apa ya …. Ooo ternyata mereka sukanya yang seperti ini terus mungkin ada yang suka dengan semacam TPR tapi ee… beda-beda dikit, atau mungkin ada yang suka denga visualization. Dan itu manjur juga. Kayak lomba diem itu aku tercetusnya juga bukan karena aku mikir, tapi 148


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spontan aja, dan sampai sekarang masih mempan. Pernah setres ga sih di awal-awal gitu? Ternyata ngajar anak kecil itu aduuhhh…. Pernah mbak, aku pernah pengen sempat resign. Capek ek mbak… Wonge gedhe tapi kalahnya sama anak-anak kecil. Tapi ya akhirnya tak coba tak coba tak telateni, ya memang makan ati sih mbak. Aku mikirnya sih, aku memang suka sama anak-anak, di luar jam pelajaran yang nakal-nakal itu mereka juga sayang sama aku. Aku mikirnya gitu dan aku juga saying sama mereka ya tak tunjukin ajalah, tak terusin ajalah. Jalu pernah sharing ga sama teman kantor tentang masalah, kok anak-anak di kelas suka rame ya? Pernah tapi, cuman tanya caranya gimana… Khan aku satu kantornya sama cewek-cewek semua, soalnya khan itu guru yang di lantai 1 dan kebetulan itu cewek semua. Terus aku tanya gimana caranya enaknya soalnya anak-anakku kayak gini kayak gini… terus mereke cerita “Itu biasanya caranya, triknya gini… gini…” Ada juga yang cerita “Iya bener kok Mr. Aku dulu juga gitu… “, terus mereka cerita caranya begini… Akhirnya malah berbagi cerita malah dapat ilmu juga gitu… Setelah Jalu denger cara-cara dari teman itu terus langsung dicoba atau dipikir dulu? Kalau aku e... ada beberapa yang langsung tak coba ada beberapa yang tak modifikasi, ada juga yang tak pikir…. Ee…. Tak buat bahan pemikiran, terus habis itu tak sesuaikan… ohhh guru ini karakternya seperti ini… terus karakterku ga bisa seperti guru itu. Misalkan aku khan orangnya lebih cendurung kalem kan mbak ke anak-anak ga bisa galak, terus ada guru yang galak, bener-bener bisa galak dan aku nggak bisa kayak gitu. Terus caranya gimana ya, biar anak-anak mau. Kalau dia seperti itu, aku harus seperti apa. Terus aku tak jadiin bahan pemikiran, tak cari lagi caranya. Kalau di kelas anak-anak rame gitu apakah mempengaruhi planningmu, RPP mu hari itu? Beberapa kali… waktu itu di bulan pertama itu beberapa kali pelajaran yang ga tuntas goalnya itu karena mereka rame. Nah itu aku share ke Waka Kurikulumnya itu to … ke beliau terus … pas itu aku ngajar kelas 2 Sparkling yang ada 2 biang kerok nya tadi itu mbak, terus aku bilang “Saya ga tuntas Sir di situ ngajarnya…” khan Waka Kurikulumnya itu cowok to mbak. Dia cerita “Ooo… gitu. Saya dulu memang sempat ngajar di situ. Jadi guru subtitue guru matematika di situ. Dan saya juga ga tuntas ngajarnya di situ, jadi nggak papa. Memang ga seketika itu juga bisa menguasai kelasnya”. Dan aku mikir di situ dan punya sebuah konklusi kalau RPP itu bukanlah segalanya gitu. Dulu khan yang bulan pertama ngajar khan ini harus … harus tercapai

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RPP ku. Tapi ya intinya KD, SKKD sama indikatornya sudah tercapai ohh yaudah… Jadi ga usah terlalu yang idealis. Sekarang Jalu sudah settled dengan anak-anak, lebih bisa mengontrol atau belum, atau sudah tapi ingin lebih lagi? Masih pengen lebih lagi sih mbak, sudah lebih baik sih tapi … sudah punya cara-cara. Cuma kadang-kadang loss control gitu lho mbak sama anak-anaknya terus aku bingung mau diapain lagi ya gitu. Terus pakai cara-cara yang kemaren itu ada yang kurang mempan. Masa mau pake cara-cara yang itu terus untuk mengantisipasi anak-anaknya nanti bosen. Masih pengen bisa lebih lagi sih mbak. Waktu kuliah belajar ga sih how to deal with children? TEYL diajarin dan aku harus buka bukunya lagi dan bukunya di gudang mbak… Jalu merasa ga ngajar yang sebenernya itu jauh dari apa yang kita bayangkan waktu kuliah? Ternyata anak-anak itu ga gampang di taklukan misalnya…. Iya mbak … bener mbak waktu kuliah itu khan kita belajarnya anak-anak itu baik ya semua hal-hal yang ideal ternyata pas di dunia kerja itu anak-anaknya rame banget mbak… Apalagi dulu pas aku PPL nya masih aman, itungannya aman soalnya mereka sudah SMP dan itu SMP Lab masih mending ya nakal-nakal biasa tapi masih bisa diatur. Makanya dulu aku daftar pertama ke Bethany itu SMP. Cuman SMP itu penuh dan aku ditawari ke SD. Terus aku mau, daripada enggak kerja, hehehe…. Terus ee…. Sekalian tantangan baru, eh ternyata ya itu tadi… sama sekali huaaaaa……… Kalau mbak Kiki kemaren cerita kalau hal penting yaitu classroom management itu harus kita kuasai tapi malah kita tuh ga belajar dulunya. Kalau Jalu gimana? He‟eh bener mbak itu bener. Dan aku itu kewalahannya di situ. Classroom management ku itu masih, mungkin kalau dari skala 1-10 itu masih 4 mungkin mbak sampai sekarang. Jadi eee… Kalau untuk kelas 2 lho kadang-kadang bisa kadang-kadang enggak, dan sering-seringnya itu rame banget terusss dan habis itu kalau udah tak peringatkan aku harus menggunakan suara yang keras gitu, padahal aku paling nggak mau itu pake suara yang keras sampai bentak itu enggak mau. Jadi kadang mereka mau diem kadang enggak. Jadi mereka itu kayaknya moody gitu lho mbak… dan capek. Yaaahhh itulah mbak… classroom management itu mbak duuhh… Dari sekolah ada support ga untuk guru baru tentang classroom management? Emmm… Sejauh ini belum ada sih mbak, paling cuman disarankan sama ya beberapa guru dan terutama dari Waka Kurikulum itu di perpustnya Bethany itu ada buku tentang Nanny 150


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911, untuk meng-handle anak. Terus cuman disuruh itu, aku cari artikelnya di internet juga tentang tehniknya dari Nanny 911. Cuma ya belum ada yang bener-bener bisa praktis tak aplikasikan gitu belum ada yang bisa, tak apa ya… tak pake… karena pasti beda gitu lho…. Berarti sekarang masih berjuang untuk itu ya … Emmm… Jalu kau habis kerja gitu ada seperti refleksi ga hari ini aku gagal di mana ya, sukses di mana ya, apa yang kurang ya? Iya mbak, kalau itu aku biasanya habis ngajar sih mbak. Habis ngajar itu biasnya tak pikir, oohhh tadi itu harusnya gini, ooohhh tadi harusnya kayak gini, kalau aku pegang si anak ini harusnya bisa lebih baik. Ya kayak gitu sih mbak, sehabis ngajar, kalau pulang kerja malah biasanya enggak, aku udah nggak tak pikir lagi, aku mikirnya buat besok lagi mikirnya… besok gini ya…. Kalau ngajar anak-anak itu pernah ga ngalami, mereka ditanya sudah jelas belum jawabnya sudah tapi ternyata belum? Kalau murid-muridku ini cenderung jujur mbak. Kalau belum jelas mereka bilang “Aku masih nggak tau Mr”, gitu mereka bilang kayak gitu. Terus habis itu tak jelasin lagi. Cuma enggak ke semua tapi aku harus ke dianya sendiri soalnya kadangkadang gini mbak, kalau tak jelasin ke semua “Lhoh ini khan aku udah tau Mr” gitu yang lain gitu. Jadi aku harus jelasin ke yang sini terus yang lain tak suruh diem dulu tenang dulu, boleh misalkan mereka beraktifitas tapi enggak rame. Aku jelaskan ke satu anak ini baru nanti aku balik lagi ke semunya. Di dalam pikiranmu sebelum melewati proses ngajar beberapa bulan ini, harusnya kalau ngajar anak-anak itu baiknya yang seperti apa sih? Idealnya yang ngajar anak-anak itu yang fun, lucu, menyenangkan. Terus setelah beberapa bulan ini ngajar itu berubah nggak? Eee… berubah sedikit, fun tapi tegas… karena soalnya anakanak khan masih belum tau tanggung jawabnya mereka sebagai pelajar itu adalah belajar. Kayak anak kelas 2 itu masih pengennya main aja... Jadi harus selalu diingetin-diingetin lagi. Terus apalagi mereka itu anaknya orang berpunya semua jadi lebih ke apa ya respect ke orang lainnya itu perlu lebih ditingkatin. Tegasnya itu tegas di situ tapi harus tetap fun, nah itu yang susah. Pernah ga ngajar terus hasilnya separoh kelas ga begitu bagus? Emm… enggak mbak. Cuman paling satu dua anak mbak. Kenapa bisa dapat jelek? Emmm… ya itu tadi mbak anak yang nyembunyiin remote itu tadi yang itu dia itu males mbak, malesnya bukan main. Kalau udah tak suruh ngerjain itu seringnya asal-asalan padahal dia bisa. Misalkan dia remedial gitu, tak tanyain secara lisan gitu 151


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bisa njawab, dapat 100. Tapi kalau misalnya pas ngerjain test gitu, dia itu buru-buru mau ngapain gitu nggak tau… Terus ngerjainnya malah asal-asalan. Untuk anak ini, kamu pernah nggak ada komunikasi dengan orang tuanya? Belum sih, paling … soalnya itu kayak masih lebih berat tanggung jawabnya ke wali kelasnya. Jadi aku lebih sering komunikasiin ke wali kelas biarpun itu ee…. Seremeh apappun dan kalau itu crucial bagi si anak ini aku komunikasikan ke wali kelas. Jadi aku bilang “Miss, tadi si Ken anu lho Miss, tidur di kelas atau eee…. Sepatunya dicopot di kelas terus mengganggu temennya jijik”. Ya aku komunikasikannya lewat wali kelasnya biar nanti orang tuanya diberi tau, tapi ga pernah langsung ke orang tuanya. Jalu, berarti udah sadar ya aware sama dua anak yang suka buat masalah di kelas itu? Apa ada treatment khusus buat dia? Kalau khusus nggak sih mbak. Paling aku liat kondisinya dia gimana, paling aku mikir harusnya gimana. Oooo… tapi kalau learning ability nya ga ada masalah ya, ya cuman suka rame aja ya…? Iya mbak lebih ke karakternya itu. Kalau ngajar, materinya nurut dari My Pals atau kamu sesuaikan muridku itu kemampuannya dimana terus cari dari source lain? Kalau aku liat dulu dari materinya My Pals apa bahannya, khan buku panduannya itu, tapi aku buat sendiri. Kayak tadi membahas tentang things we wear on hot and cold day, jadi aku misalkan di My Pals nya ada gambar cewek pakai sun-hat terus aku cari gambar sun-hat terus tadi tak display tak jadiin buat teka-teki. Aku tanya “What is this thing?” terus urut absen tak suruh maju jawab. Terus kalau tentang L1/ L2, Jalu ada peraturan khusus ga untuk anak-anak di kelas? Aku selalu negur anak-anak yang pake Bahasa Indonesia, cuman anak-anak kelas 2 ini susah, masih susah untuk disuruh pake Bahasa Inggris, kayak mereka itu mmmm….. ada anak-anak yang memang ga mau. Dan kayaknya memang mereka belum bisa Bahasa Inggris gitu. Tak ingetin, “Speak English please! In English please!” gitu, terus ya kayaknya memang harus peraturan sih, aku khan masuk baru kalau misalkan di tengah-tengah ini nanti aku set peraturan kayak gini mereka ee…. Terus nanti “Dulu ga gitu Mr…. ga mau….” Kayak gitu. Jadi sekarang tak ikuti dulu baru nanti di tahun ajaran baru aku mau tak perbaharui semuanya tak kasih peraturan. Aku dulu pernah khan jadi substitute teacher di kelas 5 itu juga gurunya ngasih peraturan kalau ngomong pake Bahasa Indonesia itu di denda. Dan itu aku suka, jadi bener-bener malah tak buatin tak jadiin hal yang fun 152


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“Waaa… you speak Indonesian”. Kalau kondisinya seperti aku gini serba bingung mbak, masih mencari-cari. Berarti pernah observe kelas lain atau pernah lihat kelas lain? Eee… pernah. Jadi begitu lolos yang micro teaching itu terus masuk terus penjelasan tentang administrasi, aku disuruh observe kelas yang lain. Aku lihat CE sama English. Yang English ngajarnya tegas, yang CE ngajarnya alus. Bisa sih aku ngajarnya, cuman untuk yang kelas 2 itu waaaahhh susah banget. Aku pengennya tegas tapi fun. Jalu merasa berat ga sih, mesthi ngajar, ngurusin anak-anak yang rame, masih harus ngerjain administrasi? Cukup ga waktu kerja di kantor, atau pasti masih harus nglembur di rumah? Emmm… dulu waktu pertama protest mbak, tapi protest nya tak batin, kenapa kok gini… kerja itu kok kayak gini ya ternyata, tapi sekarang ya tak jalani aja… Malah aku bisanya ngerjain segala sesuatu itu bisanya di rumah, dulu. Dulu biasanya semua tak bawa ke rumah, tak bawa ke rumah. Terus, tak kerjain di rumah karena dulu memang aku nggak ada laptop, adanya PC jadinya tak kerjain di rumah. Jadi kayak kebiasaan terus lamalama nggak effektif kalau kayak gini terus nanti ketinggalan, terus makanya aku tak beli laptop terus kalau ada yang bisa tak kerjain di sekolah ya tak kerjain di sekolah. Nyatanta ya mulai bisa… Berarti sekarang sudah enggak pernah bawa kerjaan ke rumah? Ada sih yang masih kalau kepepet lupa ya masih tak kerjain di rumah. Kalau ngajar, Jalu kasih worksheet gitu? Endak sih mbak, aku pake workbooknya aja. Khan My Pals itu ada 2 Textbook sama Workbook, nah kebanyakan anak-anak itu cuman punya Workbook aja. Nah Textbooknya itu enggak mbak, jadi kadang-kadang aku mikir “terus gunane beli ki opo?” hehehehe... Jadi aku harus kadang-kadang… Ada anak yang beli Textbook, tapi enggak semua. Jadi di satu kelas itu cuman ada 2, maksimal itu cuman dua yang beli Textbook sama Workbook. Yang lain cuman beli Workbook, bahkan enggak beli sama sekali. Terus jadi aku, harus misalkan materi yang dari Textbook itu tak scan terus tak display di kelas. Kadang ada yang bilang “Lho… Mr ini khan ada di Textbook?” aku jawab “Iyaaa…. “ hehehehe… Kalau ambil nilai dari apa aja? Kuis, monthly test, test, sama mid-term test. Koreksinya banyak? Enggak. Suasanya lingkungan kerja gimana? Enak sih… Cuman eee…. Hehehe… ada beberapa hal yang lucu tak anggap lucu aja dari tempat kerjaku ini, hubungan personal 153


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sih. Itu mengganggu ga? Enggak sih mbak, aku cuman nganggepnya lucu aja. Oooohh ternyata di sekolah bisa kayak gitu ya… Tapi itu menyangkut ke kamu nggak? Ndak mbak ndak…. Hehehe…. Kepala sekolah support ga pas awal-awal kamu mulai ngajar? Support, sangat support. Seperti apa? Beliau observe yang waktu awal dia observe dan terus mengenalkanku ke guru-guru lain. Dia juga suka tanya terus perkembanganku, gimana betah apa enggak, pas awal-awal aku kerja itu beliau sering dating ke kantor guru. Waktu Bapak Kepala Sekolah observe, dia ngasih feedback nggak? Waktu itu….Ooohhh dikasih dikasih mbak… tapi enggak langsung sih. Apa feedbacknya? Suara yang keras, soalnya beliau suaranya keras banget… “Huaaaaa….” Gitu… Kalau aku harus bener-bener konsentrasi baru suaranya keras, soalnya khan suaranya keturunan mbak, ibuk bapak ku khan suarane ya kayak gini. Dulu waktu awal-awal kerja sering cerita ngeluh gitu nggak sih, sama bapak ibuk? Eee… ya cerita sama ibuk sih, seringnya sama ibuk, karena bapak khan kerjanya di luar kota. Ya ngeluh sih… Buk kerjane kok kayak gini… gini… ya Ibuk bilang “Ya sabar….” Paling ya kayak gitu tok, sama ngasih tau yang namanya kerja ya kayak gitu. Dikasih penguatan juga dari situ, akhirnya ya sampai sekarang ya nyatanya masih. Apasih yang membuat kamu masih bertahan? Apa ya…. Mmmm….. kalau yang membuat bertahan itu. Kayak, maksudku kayak pembuktian ke diri sendiri gitu lho mbak. Soalnya gini, di situ aku khan juga ada beberapa yang kenal kan kayak-kayak Dewa mbak Kiki terus ada beberapa yang lain. Mereka aja bisa, masa aku nggak bisa? Terus ya aku coba dengan caraku sendiri, setiap ada… setiap ada apa pemikiran untuk keluar, coba ah tak butktiin dulu sampai sejauh mana aku mau bertahan. Terus aku mikir-mikir gitu terus… ya sempat ada di titik terendah terus ya tak pikir lagi, ya pokoknya mbalik terus lah mbak… Sekarang ini masih ada fikiran untuk keluar? Sekarang sudah endak sih mbak, cuman kalau misalkan eee…. Misalkan ditawari di tempat yang lain itu ya misalkan apa yg load kerja yang ga sebanyak ini aku mau.

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Perasaan pengen resign itu ada di bulan-bulan pertama? Satu bulan di awal, 2 bulan itu udah nggak, udah ketemu fun nya. Fun nya itu apa? Ngajar anak-anak nya sendiri itu ternyata juga fun mbak. Waktu sebulan di awal khan anak-anaknya memang ga bisa diatur tapi dah ketemu kayak seninya sendiri, kayak gitu terus tementemennya juga asyik. Kayak diemong juga sih mbak aku, soalnya aku sekarang paling muda di situ. Jadi kayak punya banyak kakak di situ. Kalau ngajar seringnya pake method approach tertentu ga? Atau ciptaannya Jalu sendiri? Kalau aku sejauh ini masih dengan metode ku sendiri sih mbak, soalnya eee…. Pengennya sih kayak cooperative learning tapi nggak cooperative banget, karena yang kelas 2 itu masih apa ya harus bener-bener harus banyak lebih belajar lagi supaya aku tau metode apa yang tepat untuk anak-anak ini. Kenapa pengennya cooperative learning? Soalnya yang terbantu aja, nanti anak-anaknya lebih ee… lebih apa ya mereka kayak mengetahui sendiri dari materi pelajaran yang tak kasih itu, tiap anak ada kontribusi untuk itu. Apa itu beliefmu tentang learning? Enggak juga sih mbak, aku nggak saklek gitu. Aku nanti kalau menemukan yang baik lagi ya aku khan ganti. Dulu kalau dari sekolah khan sempat mau mengembangkan tentang MI, terus ada training-training tentang itu, sebelum aku masuk. Tapi sempat terhenti karena adanya akreditasi. Ya waktu aku masuk itu. Terus belum dilanjutkan lagi. Pemrakarsanya ya Waka Kurikulum itu, karena beliau percaya bahwa kalau setiap anak khan punya kecerdasan masing-masing di bidang masingmasing dan itu yang mau di gali dan caranya gimana biar ketahuan nah itu ada trainingnya cuman aku kemaren belum ikut itu.

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Interview Transcript 3 Day and date : Monday, February 24, 2014 Time : 04.45 p.m. – 06.00 p.m. Location : Jalu‟s house Jl. Nakula Sadewa, Taman Kembang Arum, Salatiga. A : Adesia J : Jalu Interview 3 A1 J1 A2 J2 A3 J3 A4 J4 A5 J5

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Text Dek Jalu anak tunggal ya? Ga ada saudara? He‟em… Sehari-hari di rumah tinggal dengan? Sama ibuk aja mbak… Kalau bapak? Bapak kerja di Semarang khan, di Kaliwungu deket Kendal. Minggu pulang mbak Pekerjaan bapak apa ya dek? Bapak kerja di PT. Kartabina persewaan alat berat gitu mbak. Dek, dulu khan pas interview yang lewat facebook cerita kalau habis lulus SMA, FBS itu jadi pilihan utama. Kenapa ya? Alasannya ya itu tadi mbak, karena kondisi itu tadi to mbak, Bapak khan mulai tahun 2009 khan pindah ke Kendal itu, terus otomatis aku di sini sama ibuk sendiri cuma berdua, ibuk khan juga jualan ini to… kalau siang jualan full, kalau sore ya cuman terima yang beli siapa gitu … kalau misal aku nanti kuliah di luar kota, ibu nanti sama siapa ndak ada yang nemenin nanti, alasan utamanya itu sih. Terus milih apasih yang cocok … ooohh FBS gitu. Kemaren khan juga cerita kalau dari bulan Juli sampe September itu cari-cari kerja, terus salah satunya khan nglamar kerja di Kievit, lainnya dimana lagi? Di Solo sempet daftar di mana itu namanya English One, tapi nggak jadi English instructure nya tapi nyoba jadi adminnya, adminnya juga harus full speak in English nyoba… ternyata udah lama itu mbak… ternyata kejadiannya sama kayak yang PNS itu mbak jadi setelah keterima di Bethany itu terus yang PNS itu khan lolos juga, terus kondisinya aku dah punya kerja di Salatiga enak, aku diterima di Solo, ya udah tak ambil yang Salatiga aja. Terus pernah nyoba PNS juga? Iya. Di?

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Jogja Jadi guru berarti? Daftar apa? Intruktur Bahasa Inggris. Yang di Solo itu sudah sampe proses interview dan lainnya? Iya udah interview pertama terus udah mau interview kedua untuk apa… mungkin gaji atau apa… sama yang punya, Bule juga yang punya tapi ya aku ga bisa karena aku udah keterima kerja di sini. Kalau yang PNS itu udah sampe mana prosesnya? Belum test, masih yang lolos syarat-syarat administrasi itu lho… surat SKCK dan sebagainya, tapi akhire memutuskan untuk nggak ikut. Itu jadi instruktur Bahasa Inggris jadi PNS untuk department apa? Di Disnakertrans mbak. Kalau yang Kievit kemaren itu sudah sampe tahap apa? Interview satu, interview dua terus katanya akan dihubungi lagi tapi sampai sekarang tidak dihubungi… hehehe…. Dulu khan di interview pertama juga sempat cerita kalau sebenernya jadi guru itu bukan cita-cita yang utama tapi juga bukan berarti ga suka jadi guru to… Nah pandanganmu tentang pekerjaan jadi guru itu gimana sih, sebelum kerja jadi guru ini lho…? Maksudnya yang dikerjakan gitu mbak? He‟e, jadi kalau kemaren Kiki itu cerita kalau kerja jadi guru itu dipandang orang sepele mbak… tapi setelah kerja aku sadar kalau guru itu pekerjaannya banyak dan nggak sepele dan aku bangga jadi guru yang bener. Kalau Jalu gimana? Iya, sih terlebih lagi kalau… perbedaannya setelah aku jadi dan sebelum jadi guru ya… Kalau sebelum jadi guru aku memandang wah jadi guru malah bukan sepele tapi aku khan kuliah pendidikan Bahasa Inggris, aku tau jadi guru tuh repot dan aku tuh orange bukan orang yang tipikal repot repot mau repot gitu nggak, aku orange yang praktis banget jadi pengen cari kerja yang tas tes tas tes gitu… yang di lapangan kek … apa yang dimana gitu. Pengen cari kerja yang kayak gitu terus ee… ternyata setelah jadi guru ya emang bener repot cuma tantangannya ada, dulu aku meremehkannya wah jadi guru kurang ada tantangannya nih … dan cuman pekerjaannya gitu tapi setelah kerja ini ternyata jadi guru itu asyik ada tantangannya juga ngajar anak, administrasi gitu mbak … Setelah jadi guru ini ada rasa bangga nggak jadi guru yang ngajar dengan tantangan pekerjaan seperti ini? Ya mbak bangga… bangga kalau rasa bangga itu ada rasa sendiri soalnya problemku masuk di satu sekolah yang aku rasa itu baru

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masih berkembang dan punya prospek yang cerah gitu. Dan guru-gurunya masih muda dan aku merasa ee…. banyak temennya, kecuali kalau misalkan aku masuk di suatu sekolah yang apa ya sudah lama berdiri jadi khan guru-gurunya lebih banyak yang sudah senior dari aku gitu khan untuk masalah pergaulan dan kayak semacam mentoring gitu itu khan kayak susah gitu. Kalau ini khan masih usia khan yaa… paling tua khan masih dua belas atau beberapa belas tahun di atasku khan ya masih deket. Dek, dulu cerita mulai kerja di Bethany khan 21 Oktober, proses sebelumnya itu seperti apa? Eee… waktu itu aku disms sama pacarku waktu itu bilang khan dia tau dari temennya kerjanya itu ngajar TK-nya. Terus waktu itu bilang SMP waktu itu… SMP atau SD membutuhkan, terus aku daftar yang SMP nya. Aku masukan lamaran itu 16 Agustus mbak, itu prosesnya lama, ya karena khan gurunya yang keluar itu baru bulan September. Soalnya gini mbak, belum tak ceritani ya mbak? Gini soalnya tiga bulan, dia khan masa percobaan kalau dirasa layak setelah itu dikontrak satu tahun. Kalau masih belum bisa tapi masih layak terus diperpanjang lagi 3 bulan jadi total 6 bulan to mbak tapi kalo nggak layak terus putus. Nah dia merasa dia layak kayaknya… nah aku… aku ga tau pasti ceritanya gimana pokoknya merasa layak kontrak satu tahun tapi dia cuman diperpanjang masa percobaannya terus akhirnya dia keluar, mugkin karena lamaran yang ada punyaku, terus dipanggil sekalian. Karena waktu itu memang waktu itu gurunya keluar dan lamaran yang paling baru eh paling lama itu aku terus akhirnya itu. Terys interview terus micro teaching. Terus dek, taunya kalau kamu ngajar kelas 2 itu kapan? Pas di tahap yang mana? Emmm…. Itu sehabis jadi aku ngajar kelas berapa itu waktu habis micro teaching itu sudah di kasih tau oleh kepala sekolah. Habis micro teaching khan langsung dapat keputusannya keterima atau enggak terus itu interview masalah gaji itu, nah waktu itu kepala sekolah, sekertaris sama ketua yayasan ketemu aku untuk membicarakan aku ngajar kelas berapa, tapi belum tau detailnya, cuman kelas 2, 3, 4 aku ngajar ini ini. Cuman dijelaskan… dijelentrehkannya itu baru waktu sama wakil kepala sekolah bagian kurikulum itu. Kalau yang PIC swimming itu tugasnya apa? Kalau PIC swimming itu tugasnya ya cuman… bukan ngajar sih, khan cuma ngumpulin kalau hari Kamis sama Jumat itu khan kita setengah hari pelajarananya dan sisanya jam 12.20 itu kita ekstra 12.20 sampai jam 13.00 itu khan mereka boleh main dulu. Jam satunya itu kita ekstra. Salah satunya itu kita swimming, swimming itu nanti sebelum jam satu aku mengumpulkan

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mereka dulu ke kelas-kelas habis itu “Who join swimming today? Siapa yang nggak?” terus nanti alasannya kenapa enggak. Terus sudah. Kalau sudah baru diingatkan nanti kumpul di biasanya di parking area, terus baru nanti kita dijemput mobil dari Laras Asri. Terus nunggu di sana sampai mobilnya dating, terus udah gitu aja. Yang cerita orang tua murid protes karena soal kuis yang gambarnya ge jelas itu gimana sih detailnya, anaknya ga bisa kerjain karena gambarnya ga jelas atau gimana? Emm… kayaknya iya, soalnya kebetulan temen-temen guru di sana itu sering mewanti-wanti kalau parents-nya di sana itu pretty demanding gitu lho mbak. Jadi kalau misalkan kalau ada sesuatu yang ga beres sama anaknya itu protes. Nah salah satu yang gap rotes ini biasanya anakku dapatnya 8 ke atas atau 8 bahkan waktu itu ada yang dapet 60 tak kasih itu karena memang ngawur jawabnya. Usut punya usut bisanya dia dapetnya 8 sama guru yang sebelumnya, terus protes, cuman ga protes sih cuman nanya “Mr, ini gambarnya kok kayak gini ga terlalu jelas terus soalnya juga mungkin anak-anak ga paham.” Aku jawab “Oh gitu ya buk ya…” aku cuman bilang “Ini sudah tak konsultasikan ke Waka kurukulumnya”, soalnya khan yang tugas untuk mengoreksi soal khan beliau. Itu satu-satunya pembelaanku dan aku khan masih baru. Aku enggak tau… eemmm… masih belum tau seberapa jauh konsep pemahaman anak-anaknya. Dari situ berarti ada pelajaran ya…? Oohhh kalau besok lagi buat soal berarti aku harus… He‟e kayak minggu kemaren yang tak sampein itu to mbak. Jadi pokoknya KD nya apa, standard kompetensinya apa, indikatornya apa, tak buat soal yang semudah mungkin kira-kira anak yang paling eee… pencapainya yang paling rendah di kelas itu bisa ngerjain, tapi juga ada tantangan juga buat anak yang pinter di kelas itu, jadi imbanglah. Yang ngajar di jam siang khan anak-anak suka rame, khan dulu juga pernah cerita ngalami sama kayak Kiki itu kamu serius diganduli gitu kakinya? Ee… diganduli gitu… kalau diganduli di kaki gitu enggak cuman ada anak yang sukanya gelendotan. Aku ga sampai separah itu sih mbak, cuman gelendotan terus tak peringatin terus dia kembali ke tempat duduknya gitu. Atau waktu aku lagi ngambil sesuatu di bawah tau tau ada yang lari kayak minta gendong di punggung mbak. Lhoh… apa ini hahahaha… tapi ya tak suruh kembali… Pas dari pertama ngajar masalah L1 sama L2 di kelas gimana dek? Masih banyak yang pake L1? Kalau sampai sekarang sih masih kadang-kadang perlu diingetin yang sudah terbiasa itu malah yang kelas 3 4 itu sudah terbiasa

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meskipun di kelas 3 dan 4 aku ngajarnya bukan Inggris. Jadi aku di kelas 2 ini cuman ngingetin terus “In English please. Speak in English please.” Kalau anak-anak masih sering pake L1 jadi rame nggak sih di kelas? Khan mereka bisa ngobrol sama temennya? Emmm…. Kayaknya lebih ke suatu ketika mereka ingin mengatakan sesuatu yang kelas 4 atau kelas 3 itu punya trik, mereka sebisa mungkin berbicara dengan Bahasa Inggris. Kalau ada satu kata yang pake Bahasa Indonsia mereka ada gesture nya gini (quotation mark). Tapi kalau yang kelas 2 belum bisa kayak itu. Jadi kalau mereka pengen mengatakan sesuatu dalam Bahasa Inggris tapi ga bisa, mereka langsung pake Bahasa Indonesia. Jadi effortnya mereka masih kurang, jadi ya tak ingetin terus tak ingetin terus. Di jam kosong pas ga ngajar khan ceritanya ngerjain administrasi, semua bisa selesai dalam jam-jam itu? Wah kalau mau diselesain yaa… tergantung pekerjaannya apa mbak. Kalau misalkan buat soal, terus kisi-kisi gitu ya kadang di bawa di rumah terus diselesaikan di rumah. Bahkan kalau mungkin misalkan pas ada tugas dari sekolah kayak kemaren beli bibit tanaman buat acara gowes itu khan kita harus ada sumbang sihnya ke departemen lingkungan hidup itu khan beli tanaman terus yaudah di waktu harusnya aku bisa ngerjain administrasi aku beli taneman. Yaudah kerjaannya tak bawa ke rumah. Berarti harus pinter ngatur waktu ya? He‟eh jadi ga harus selalu di rumah semua atau di sekolah semua itu sih. Bedanya dulu sama sekarang berarti jauh lebih rapi ya untuk mengatur waktu? Aku bukan lebih rapi sih mbak lebih fleksible. Jadi dulu khan pertama-tama masih idealis, ini harus dikerjakan di sini ini di sini. Sekarang yaweslah kalau ga bisa dikerjakan di sekolah ya di rumah. Kalau ditanya nih… bedanya Jalu yang dulu pas di awal-awal kerja sama yang sekarang itu apa? Mungkin apa ya? Yang jelas anak-anak lebih familiar sama aku itu jelas pasti dan mereka kayak lebih seneng juga sama aku. Bahkan kemaren sempat ada guru baru juga yang masuk, aku harus ngajar untuk promosi sekolah ngajar art, khan guru art nya ga begitu fasih Bahasa Inggrisnya, jadi aku ngajar art sama guru artnya tapi aku lebih yang Bahasa Inggrisnya jadi asistentnya dia buat ngajar art sama music. Terus ada yang gantiin aku di kelas 2 itu ngajar terus anak-anak “Lhoo Mr. Jalu kemana??” sampai kayak gitu mbak, aku ya kaget. Ya… gitu sih… lebih deket aja sama anak. Pernah ada masalah ga dengan assessment? 160


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Masalahnya ini mbak, ga pernah ada yang ngajarin cara apa bikin analisa nilainya, aku cuman dapat file excel nya dari guru yang lama itu untuk hasil test yang lama. Yaudah tak pelajari sendiri sampai puyeng pake rumus-rumus excel yang yang pernah tak pelajari. Akhirnya bisa buat sendiri. Dan itu rumus yang sama sebenernya ya cuman aku cari sendiri. Analisa nilai itu gimana sih? Jadi analisis nilai itu kayak misalkan kita punya 20 soal, emmm 10 pilihan ganda, 5 isian, 5 urain. Pilihan ganda itu pointnya berapa per soal, itu ditulis terus itu ada kolomnya untuk per-anak jadi anak ini di soal nomer berapa salah nomer berapa salah terus point totalnya untuk nomer ini misalkan di kelas 2 Sparkling itu berapa terus ada yang butuh remedial dan pengayaan itu khan ketauan dari situ, terus ada kolom untuk menghitung ini tuntas KKM atau tidak tuntas itu ada. Wow… detail sekali ya…? Nah itu makanya mbak, waktu bener-bener masuk situ tuh yang stress out gitu… Waktu kuliah ga dikasih tau kerjaannya seperti ini dan menurutku di sekolah-sekolah lain ga ada yang kayak gini. Tapi buahnya besok, itu malah membantu sendiri. Terus dulu yang cerita terakhir itu khan ga kerekam, yang mau test tapi malah workbooknya dikumpulkan itu, terus itu jadi belajar kalau culturenya di sekolah itu begini. He‟em mbak jadi belajar kalau ga semua anak punya textbook dan workbook. Setelah melampaui semua ini dari awal kerja sampai sekarang sudah masuk 5 bulanan. Ada wish ga? Maksudku harapanya kamu ingin apa, perlu apa to perform better? Kayaknya perlu training untuk ee… untuk classroom management. Soalnya aku merasa kayaknya ga cuman aku aja yang butuh tapi beberapa temen juga mengeluhkan itu. Jadi masih butuh. Apalagi kita masih muda khan kebanyakan dan masih sangat butuh kalau misalkan kita di training masalah classroom management khan kita lebih enak dan kita misalkan punya satu pemahaman yang sama ee…. untuk menghandle suatu kelas, jadi enggak tiap orang punya beda style sendiri, nanti khan anak-anak ada adaptasi sendiri kalau menurutku sih kayak gitu. Kalau kita punya konsep yang sama untuk menghandle kelas nanti kita lebih enak jadi nanti gayanya di sekolah ini tuh begini. Jadi kayak ada standardnya apa, jadi semua guru sama, dan nanti muridnya pun ga wah nanti kalau sama Mr ini bisa gini kalau sama laini begini? He‟em… he‟em… iya … iya… soalnya aku masih merasa di sekolah kayak gitu mbak. Wah aku kalau sama Miss ini kayak gini. Jadi style ku ngajar sama yang tak ganti khan pasti berbeda 161


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dan juga karekternya khan juga beda cuman kalau di sekolah ini ada suatu pemahaman tentang classroom management atau tipe pengajaran seperti ini nanti sepaham nanti lebih enak lagi. Apasih dek yang membuatmu bertahan sampai sekarang? Yang utamanya to mbak, aku juga ga terlalu apa ya … terlalu yakin apa sih yang mebuat aku bertahan, ya itu tadi factor-faktor nya itu tadi mbak yang kayak di interview kemaren, ya cuman mungkin kalau dipikir-pikir yang utam itu aku sudah punya satu pekerjaan di Salatiga yang itu bener-bener tak doakan selama ini terus minta sama Tuhan kerja di Salatiga dan ini aku dapet gitu lho… Kalau aku resign dan aku keluar berarti aku enggak bersyukur sama Tuhan soalnya ini satu-satunya pekerjaan di Salatiga yang menerima aku, berarti ini khan jawaban dari Tuhan udah gitu. Kayak rasa syukur ke Tuhan, jadi religious aku mbak. Menurut Jalu dan pengalaman sampai saat ini, komunikasi antara guru dan orang tua itu penting ga? Kalau menurutku penting mbak. Ya soalnya kayak dalam materi itu khan setiap bulan kita khan buat namanya summary. Summary itu isinya jadwal bulanan kita terus schedule nya bulanan. Jadi tanggal ini bulan Maret terus jadwalnya ini topik pembahasannya apa untuk kelas 2 Glowing dan kelas 2 Sparkling itu khan beda. Terus itu nanti disetor ke wali kelas nanti dimasukan ke jadwal kelas yang nanti akan di upload ke website. Terus nanti kita buat summary, summarynya itu ringkasan materi yang akan dibahas di bulan depan gitu. Nah kadang-kadang … eh… bukan kadang-kadanga sih kalau English itu aku mesthi scan materi dari buku cetak, nah di situ itu jadi polemic sendiri buat aku karena ada beberapa anak yang sudah punya buku dan itu cuman segelintir, satu atau 2 di masing-masing kelas, dan yang sisanya cuman punya workbook bahkan tidak punya buku sama sekali karena merasa sudah ada summary, biar hemat uang juga khan. Terus jadi akhirnya tetep tak scan aja. Suatu ketika aku mikir gini, kalau kayak gini terus kayaknya perlu ada deh koordinasi ke orang tua mengenai materi eee… aku ketemu orang tua sendiri menjelaskan materi yang akan tak pakai ke orang tua. Cuman itu kayaknya bukan hakku tapi wewenangnya wali kelas untuk menjelaskan itu semua.

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APPENDIX 4 Participants’ Consents

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PLAGIAT MERUPAKAN TINDAKAN TIDAK TERPUJI

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